19yr old male neighbor has interest in 13 yr old neighbor female...
@10fingaz2getha4eva (287)
United States
May 14, 2008 11:58pm CST
i have a 19 yr old guy that lives a few houses down from me who recently started seeing the 13 yr old girl that lives next to me.if that isnt enough of a problem her parents(real father,stepmother) only act like its a problem when someone ie:me says something im vocal about them allowing the two to hang out in her bedroom or his house alone or the fact they are all up on each other when at her house i disagree with it i have a neice and cousins that age and know that i wouldnt nor would the parents allow this to happen he has a girlfriend his age with a child who is 3 that calls him daddy not his child but he is very sexually active the 13 yr old had a crush prior but at 13 they have crushes on half the boys i guess what really bother me is the fact they arent stepping in making more of a effort to control the sitaution and ive spoken with both the boy and girl and explained why it isnt a good idea of course she doesnt pay it no mind because her parents dont no really that is what she said they act like its ok so why shouldnt i do it and the boy who fancies himself a friend of mine says that he is playing with her and that it isnt goin to go any further than a kiss or words ive tried to tell him thats unfair to her and stupid on his part hes goin to hurt her and end up in trouble...anyone think of a better way to prevent this? im not being nosey they bring this to me she talks about him non stop and he plays it up but says its a joke
3 people like this
8 responses
@liquorice (3887)
•
15 May 08
Hi, I can see that it must be hard for you to stand by and not do anything. I've made a few posts on here in different discussions saying that age doesn't matter in a relationship, but obviously when one of them is thirteen this doesn't really apply! She's just a child and doesn't need to be involved with someone like this, and it's unfair that her mum isn't guiding her well in this. Even if this guy is 'just' playing with her, that's hardly fair. She's at an age where she's feeling some very confusing emotions and it's just cruel to lead her on like this. And if he does take it further then obviously it's illegal and hopefully he realises that he could get arrested for it.
1 person likes this
@10fingaz2getha4eva (287)
• United States
16 May 08
yes see thats exactly what im saying im all for dating more mature men or even women but when the age diff. is between a 13 and 19 yr old its wrong no matter how its looked at shes fresh from barbies and plastic dolls hes into career choices and awaiting the bar sence
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
15 May 08
Maybe you can relate a story to them, I have a now 23 year old nephew that at the time was 19 and he moved in with a friend that had a 14 year old daughter, the friend would leave him there and the daughter that was to babysit her brothers and sisters, I noticed my nephew getting close to her and pointed out how wrong it would be for him to get involved, well even tho the girls mom kinda pushed the relationship, to make a long story short, she got pregnant and he has been in prison for the last 3 years, so..... if this girl says she really cares about him tell her to care enough to wait till their older, if the boy really cares about her tell him the same thing. It may or may not help ulimately the decision is up to them, but at least you have done what you can to keep them both out of trouble.
@10fingaz2getha4eva (287)
• United States
16 May 08
he says there isnt any real feelings there where as the girl being that young thinks she knows its love
i know crazier things have happened and heck i might even be less vocal if i thought maybe it was more than just lust on both parts misguilded surely but the whole thing is just twisted to me thanks for commenting
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
15 May 08
Sometimes you just need to let it be, and let the parents deal with it. If they see nothing wrong with it, there is nothing you can really do, unless the girl ends up getting Raped, abused, or pregnant from this man, and then probably someone besides you would have to make charges from it. Sometimes in this day and age, girls are not shown enough Love and appreciation at home, and go searching for it elsewhere. Then it is up to the man what he does from there. Just my thoughts.
1 person likes this
@10fingaz2getha4eva (287)
• United States
15 May 08
true but im 24 and both consider me a friend tho i feel im more the cool adult who offers good advice and a ear less the type to actully hang out with them nothing like that but i just feel like maybe i should say or do more to prevent anything bad from happening i too was a wild girl but alot of hard lessons put me in my place i dont want her to get hurt and him to get in trouble all because of this but you are right i need to let them learn..thanks for commenting!!
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
15 May 08
This is an unhealthy situation and the parents should
know better as the kid at nineteen is much more likely
to already be sexually at his ag e than a thirteen year
old girl even if she's precocious. as I read this I can see
just how active he has been. what on earth are her
parents thinking? It only take one time for the thirteen
year old kid to become pregnant. I am sure he thinks its
'a joke as he has a girlfriend his own age and with a baby
that is supposedly his child. Talk to the parents and then
talk to your own and see if they will talk with the
girl's parents. Someone needs to stop the nineteen year old
now.
@10fingaz2getha4eva (287)
• United States
16 May 08
his father is crazy not willing to get into it hers like i said act like it worries them when im around but then i hear this and that along the lines that they dont mind if and when it happens she stays out with him well up untill 1 am but when im around and say things like "why arent you at home?" then they are like get home or go in your room get ready for bed they play it in front of company and if i sat and acted like i was ok with it i know they would too.i mean we wont get into the inappropriate things the father says and does
@Gesusdid (1676)
• United States
15 May 08
wowo thats kinda nasty 19 year old and a 13 year old like what good is if anything going to come outta of this ? very disturbing and yet again disgusting if her parents dont care than dont worry about it its not your problem , once the girl gets pregnat before her first year of High School then its a problem for them , and youll be right there saying i told you so
1 person likes this
@abdulmajeed (75)
• India
15 May 08
In our country girl's age should be 18 years at the time of marriage.They are loving each other means they are understanding each other in each and every aspect. Parents from both side should convince them to attain the age of adults.Till then both of you are best friends.
@k8cath (341)
• Philippines
22 May 08
I think that age would be too young for the girl to have a sexually active guy friend because their friendship might lead to something undesirable in the future. What I suggest is that teens about that age should be more engaged on extra-curricular activities so that they won't be having time for other things (like boyfriends)..-_-
@Cloud475 (5)
• United States
16 May 08
At 19 he can no longer play the kid card. It is time for him to grow up. I had a college friend who was dating a high school girl but only a couple of years separated them. My friends and I found that teasing and making fun of him was a good way to bring the disparity to light. 2 years later she now goes to college and they are still dating, but he did spend lots of time thinking over his intentions.
Also a little punctuation might help a bit in your post.
