What makes you send a friends request - and do you accept all of them?
By Emiese
@Emiese (994)
Sweden
May 18, 2008 6:57am CST
One thing that I have realized now since I joined here, is that it seems I am getting several friend's request from people that I have never come across before. As far as I can see they haven't responded to any discussions I started and I do not recollect seeing their names around. (Sorry if I just have a bad memory!)
It is always fun to be welcomed like this and I generally accept all of the requests, but the unanswered question is still why they sent it to me of all people? I haven't even found a function where you can search for friends, let alone "pick" them?
So how do you do it, what do you base your friend's request on? Do you have thousands of friends here or do you just have a few that you constantly talk to? Do you accept anyone's request, whether you recollect every have come across them before or are you strict with whome you "connect"? I assume there are plenty of different philosphies here so tell me your view!
6 people like this
12 responses
@webeishere (36313)
• United States
19 May 08
Well when I first joined the site the first thing I did was send out friends requests as I knew that I needed friends to reply to my upcmoing discussions. So that is why I accept a lot of 0 point members. They need to get started as well don't they? I try to help them learn how the site works et as well to get them started in the right direction. Now if they turn out to not abide by the guidelines or send spam etc then they are gone.
HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB !!~
@Emiese (994)
• Sweden
19 May 08
But I don't think you need to have friends here to reply to discussions. When I started a week ago or so I just started by browsing around, doing a few comments on discussions here and there, and starting a few of my own, regarding what I am interesting in.
First after that, did I see who responded and seemed to be an interesting person or who made interesting discussions and I started sending a few friends requests. I think this is a bit better when you are new, then just to randomly send friend requests to people you do not know if you share anything with.
@anweshadas (372)
• India
18 May 08
I generally send a friend request from my side when I answer around 3-4 discussions of the same person.I feel I can connect to this user and his/her discussion will be the kind I am looking for or this person is someone with whom my thoughts match.I also send a friend request when I see an awesome reply from a user in any of my discussion.And the friend requests I get I just accept them without wastign much time lookign at their profiles and wonderign why they added me because I heard the more friends you have in mylot the more is the chance of having a large response to a discussion you have started.But yes I must accept of late I am getting too many friend requests from unknown people who seem to have just joined mylot.Must be some kind of spam users.
2 people like this
@Emiese (994)
• Sweden
19 May 08
It is true that you get more people reading and responding to your discussions, because your friends see that you have started a discussion. I hope you don't get to many of those spam users. Maybe it is a good idea, like someone else suggested, that one should see if it is a new user and wait a while before accepting their request, until you have seen their activity.
@wayz12 (2059)
• United States
18 May 08
I have to admit when I first started on mylot, I was stricter in accepting friendship requests. I would visit their profile first, read some of their responses before I press the accept button. Now, anybody who sends me a friendship request I just automatically accept.
As for me extending a friendship request, I usually based it on people who have answered a discussion of mine. Sometimes if I answered someone else's and they would write back a comment, I would also invite them as a friend. Sometimes, when I'm browsing around and somebody's response caught my eye, I also invite that person. So I guess in the end, there is really no rhyme and reason on how I picked my friends. But it sure is great that when I go to "discussions my friends started" section, I have plenty of options to choose from.
Hope that answers your question.
1 person likes this
@raijin (10345)
• Philippines
19 May 08
I still receive quite a few, but I just let it hang there for a while as I would also check and visit their profile if I have a time. I don't add them that quick, because I have set-up a minimum requirement for them to be added on my friend's list.
I believe that it is normal for people to make a request for them to be a part of our "circle of friends" here, but I like to keep mine in a low number because I believe most of those who makes a request are only looking for potential referrals on their other affiliated sites where they would PM and send to you. When that happens, I would remove and delete them in an instant. But I do not consider all of them, because there are still a few GOOD members here who are up to sincere friendship and as well as for them to respond to or be responded..
1 person likes this
@Emiese (994)
• Sweden
19 May 08
There you said something. I haven't checked many profiles of the people that I have gotten friends with. Normally it has been through realizing in discussions that I want to discuss something in a private message, or because I want to keep track of their discussions.
But you are right, since I didn't start by sending out friends request, but only did it after I had been here a while I have now people that I consider true friends, whereas the ones that I didn't know from the start and that I referred to in the beginning of this discussion are only a name on the list.
1 person likes this
@Emiese (994)
• Sweden
18 May 08
Hope you find some people that you would consider to put on your friends list. It is really good in the sense that you can keep track of discussions they start and respond to etc.
On a completely different note, you have a pretty picture. Almost looks as mine, although I suspect they are from very different places. Mine is from a visit in Finland, of the Finnish archipelago!
@ynigz1 (472)
• China
19 May 08
Thanks.
This photo is took from a small bay of China. I like take photos of beautiful sence. I was once lived closed this bay, and often walked along the bay after supper, looking at the blue sky, blue sea, green grass. Everything is beatuful there, and my life.
@webeishere (36313)
• United States
19 May 08
I send requests to members that have shown an interest in my discussions. I do not accept all requests sent to me though. I look at the members profile to see if we share any common interests. Also to see what type of discussions they have started as well. Some newer members send out a lot of requests to me as well. They need to get a start as well so I will accept them ever so often trying to help them learn more about this site and the way it works etc. I have over 400 friends. A lot are inactive though so I need to clear a lot out.
HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB !!~
@webeishere (36313)
• United States
19 May 08
Let me tell you it is not easy in the least.
But it is fun and challenging to me.
I am here about 10 hours a day though.
HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB !!~
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
18 May 08
I accept all the request's I receive with the exception of new users with (0) beside their name (but I wait to see if that number increases before denying them).
I too have many requests from people who I have only seen a glimpse of and have not always been in my discussions. I think they are enthralled by something I say 
or visit my profile and want more information.
If after I accept them they send links to sites without introducing themselves or at the least a simple 'Hi' then they will be short-lived on my list. I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and try to comment on their discussions - but that is not always possible especially during the week when I work away from the computer 
or visit my profile and want more information.
If after I accept them they send links to sites without introducing themselves or at the least a simple 'Hi' then they will be short-lived on my list. I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and try to comment on their discussions - but that is not always possible especially during the week when I work away from the computer 
@paid2write (5201)
•
19 May 08
I have only ever made two or three requests and those were to people who started discussions I liked.
I always accept requests but I do look at the profile to see why they may want to be my friend. Usually I find it's because I responded to their discussion or we have responded to the same discussion.
If there is no apparent reason I think they may have read one of my responses or seen me in someone else's list of friends.
I think some new members choose me because I have a high post count, so obviously I am someone who makes a lot of responses and has been a member for some time.
@Emiese (994)
• Sweden
19 May 08
There is another thing I haven't thought about; the fact that people might choose friends from the rankings! (I learn more every day about people's tactics!) I am sure you may be right, but that still doesn't explain why I got them then.. since I had about 10-20 or so, and still don't have a very high count.
@hcpoirot (1562)
• Indonesia
19 May 08
I do not think that adding friends increased our earning but then what did i know cause I am a newbie myself. I ask people to be my friends based on thier discussion here and also their response to the discussion.
For accepting friends, I had to check them if they were a newbie : the post below 10, I need to see if they continue to post here or just adding me as friend in random.
@freeservice (111)
• India
18 May 08
I can say that this purely depends person-to-person. For Eg: I would'nt accept anyone untill I know them or have discussed something with me or is of my interest. However, I have found that unlike other community sites, it does harm you to add friends in MYLOT.
Take care,
