No wedding
By Mare73
@Mare73 (1335)
United States
June 5, 2008 8:27am CST
Yes, the wedding is still on, HOWEVER, we're doing things SMALL how we originally planned it. It'll be us and that's it. I'm thinking of somewhere nearby to have something romantic and intimate. We're losing just over $700 in deposits, BUT, it's better than needing to dish out another $5000-6000. My fiance said "let's write on a piece of paper what we REALLY want to do and we'll switch papers and go from there that way the other person won't feel that the one person is changing their minds for the other person". Both of our decisions were to scrap the wedding and go with our original plans - just us!
We're relived and calm and excited and can't wait! We may do it sooner rather than later also :-)
Thoughts? Feelings? Opinions?
1 person likes this
9 responses
@Timothy31 (649)
• United States
6 Jun 08
I think whatever makes you two happy for your wedding is what you should do. Its your special day it should be exactly the way you want it and not the way others want it. So if the way you are doing it is what you two really want to do then thats all that should really matter in the end.
1 person likes this
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
5 Jun 08
Ya know Mare I have to say that doing a small intimate wedding is the best IMO...As you know we went to Jamaica to get married and it was just the hubby, myself and the kids and we pulled two ppl off the beach to be witnesses LOL...I wrote our vows if you remember and the whole thing was perfect as far as I'm concerned (except I was REALLY fat LOL)..so simple, gets the job done, its personal and you dont have to worry about pleasing everyone and their mother AND yourselves ya know..
GO TEAM! Bottomline IMO is whatever is going to make YOU TWO happy then THATS THE WAY TO GO! and if anyone b1tches about it..tell them to shut the hell up cause you didnt hear them offering to cover all the expenses of a larger wedding 
@Mare73 (1335)
• United States
5 Jun 08
You are absolutely right!!! I would love it if we could go out of NYSTATE and do it. Doesn't have to be an island or anything - heck even the American Side of the falls - he can't cross the border as he doesn't have a passport and he's a german citizen! Actually...hmmm...let me look into if he can enter Niagara Falls with me driving...He has his green card, birthcertificate and NY ID. Thoughts? Suggestions?
@meljessxena (2315)
• Australia
6 Jun 08
i like the idea of small weddings, they are so romantic, we are hoping to get married at the end of this year and its only going to be small. its good that its what you both want. its so hard when one wants something and the other partner wants something else altogether. good luck, all the best...
@Liasonfan (1702)
• Canada
10 Jun 08
Good for you, Mare! It is your day, do what you two want and what makes you both happy. I can't see the point in spending all that money and making other people happy, whem it it really not what you want. Glad to hear you are more relaxed and excited and that is as it should be. Best of luck to you!
@Liasonfan (1702)
• Canada
10 Jun 08
Well I am getting excited for you. This is going to be beautiful for the two of you. I hope we get to hear all about how it went!
@Mare73 (1335)
• United States
5 Jun 08
Ok, our original plans were to elope to Vegas in November 2008 then have a big reception in February 2009. No one knew about those plans. THEN we went to church and the pastor was preaching on the meaning of water baptisms and he said they are like marriage ceremonies; not necessary but important as it shows others your committment. SO we changed our elopment plans and started to plan this huge wedding. The decisions were made together. We sent out "save the date" cards.
What about the ppl we've invited...well when we do, do this...we're having some nice pics taken and make some Announcement cards and we're sending those out with a nice message:-)
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
5 Jun 08
You could still do Vegas on the cheap ya know...and it coudl be like your wedding and honeymoon rolled into one...Of course you can do that with the falls too (either side though naturally I recommend the Canadian side LOL)
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
6 Jun 08
Yeah, that's a great plan though. I have always thought about that sort of thing to do if I got married. Where you just have a 'party' afterwards, no frills, just a get together to show them the pictures of your wedding. Plus, it gives you the time to bond with them, unlike when you're in the ceremonies.
Good luck!
@athinapie (1150)
• Philippines
6 Jun 08
I think that it is wise to be practical nowadays considering that inflation is kicking in. And a big wedding is not really necessary. What's important is you guys get married and have a like together. Now that's what you should be saving for.
@prasanta (1948)
• India
5 Jun 08
I suggest you to be determined in your decision. Planning something, doing another thing and ultimately ending up with a bizarre thing -- people turn into laughing stocks. Becoming reasonable from the beginning is always good. But walking half way along a road, then turning up and walking in another direction, make no sense.
Any decision must be taken in cool brain, before starting working on it. Once something is decided after examining pros and cons, which is very important too, people should follow that. Otherwise, they lose their reliability in the society.
Sorry, in any case I wish you all the best for the coming days.
@ravinskye (8237)
• United States
5 Jun 08
You should do whatever makes the two of you happy. whenever my husband and i decided to get married, we wanted a small wedding. when my mom started planning it seemed like it kept getting bigger and bigger. We both are shy and really didn't want to stand up infront of a bunch of people. so finally we decided to scrap our wedding. My mom wasn't thrilled but she supported us. We just went to the Justice of the Peace with our immediate family and got married. This July will be 7 years. I don't regret doing it that way at all. The only thing I miss is there are no pictures of me in a wedding dress with my husband.
@Mare73 (1335)
• United States
5 Jun 08
Yeah, the more and more we talked about it and thought about it, the more we realized, all we want to do is be married. We both have been married in the past and have had the big hoopla; we're committed to each other and that's all that matters. Wherever we decide to do it, I would like a photograher - as I love pictures :-)
@jonesy123 (3948)
• United States
5 Jun 08
Good for you! Those who wanted to pressure you guys into a big wedding may be disappointed but they'll get used to it, lol. After all, it's YOUR day not theirs!
