The truth is revealed...
By cream97
@cream97 (29086)
United States
June 16, 2008 6:54am CST
Well, some of you at myLot know the story about my sister-in-law trying to break my marriage up.. Well yesterday, my husband and I had a long talk. He told me the reason why he has taken the old numbers out of his cell phone, is because of this .... He said that someone called up the women or woman on the phone,and they were asking a lot of questions, about my husband.. The thing is these females are people that he network with over the Internet.. He has his own business and many business associates, which are females.. Sometimes, he helps them out with their problems, kind of like mentoring.. So, as of now, I myself, am clueless on whom had called this woman.. I know it was not me.. I believe it had to been my sister-in-law or my brother-in-law... Maybe my husband left his cell phone down by accident, and they went through it... That is what the both of us are assuming.. I really believe my husband.. I know that it sounds crazy. What his sister has is many motives that links him to cheating.. Therefore, she uses these things against him.. But like I told my husband, I love him and I am no fool.. If I ever find out if he is cheating, he knows that I am gone and we are through. So, I have a question for you here at mylot.. My husband asked me this question, and it made a whole lot of sense.. He asked me, if he really was cheating, why would he even have those girls names in his phone? He said he left his phone out in the open... I have looked through his phone before, and I told him about it... No, I dislike the fact that he has these numbers, and they make me feel insecure of my love for him.. But to be honest with you, I don't believe he is cheating at all.. When I first met him, all I could see was the love, that we know have.. It has just grown.. My husband adores me... Last night, I woke up, and I came into the kitchen, and he comes down the hallway, saying..Oh, the lady of the hour is awake... Plus, when I was asleep, he fed our kids dinner.. When I woke up they were eating.. Plus, he recorded us on his webcam, as a home video. I was not dressed, my hair was messy, and he still was trying to get me into the camera.. He told me that I looked beautiful.. I kept saying negative things, and he keeps on saying positive things.. He shows me love everyday... He knows that his sister and brother are up to know good, but he handles them like he does not know hat is going on.. He warned me of my sister-in-law, but I just would not listen.. So, I guess, she is trying to really get me to believe that he is cheating.. I have come to the conclusion, that from now on in my marriage, I am going to trust God, to trust my husband.. God will tell me the truth! If he is being faithful then, he will tell me.. If he is unfaithful then the truth will be known..
7 people like this
26 responses
@spalladino (17891)
• United States
16 Jun 08
Cream, did he mention where the phone with the women's numbers is now? I agree that you should trust your husband until you have solid reason not to and, geez, I feel for you with a sister-in-law and mother-in-law like the ones you have!
@sweetdesign (5142)
• United States
16 Jun 08
That was my question why hide the phone if there is nothing to hide? I mean it doesn't make sense to hide that other phone if he is being totally honest with you. Another question (and I hate to bring up doubt in you) If these women were business associates why take thier numbers out of his business phone and put them in a phone he supposedly never uses and is now in fact missing?
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29086)
• United States
16 Jun 08
No, that is what I am still trying to figure out, It is no where in sight.. It makes me wonder why I just can't find it.. If he has nothing to hide, then that phone too will be out in the open.. His other cell phone, his main one is sitting on top of the shelf container, right above me.. The other phone, I have no clue where it is..
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29086)
• United States
16 Jun 08
No, it does not make any sense if I can't see the phone in view.. I believe that his sister may be the one that has called up the girl, and then the girl contacted him... Well the way that I see it, if he has nothing to hide, then he won't need to hide ho sold phone.. Not unless, he thinks that I called those girls..
1 person likes this
@kwenge (2487)
• Kenya
16 Jun 08
Hey Cream, I think your husband is trustworthy and he adores you soo much according to what i have just read. Not many men can allow their phones to be viewed by even their partners. I can see he says positive things about you and he helps you around with house chores like feeding kids. I think my dear you should focus on making him happy as he does you. Learn to trust him and let everything that is in darkness remain there until the time God decides to reveal them unto you.
Let me ask you a small question! Why is your sister in-law soo concerned about your husbands affairs? Doesnt she want the two of you happy?
@sweetdesign (5142)
• United States
16 Jun 08
I am glad you are putting your trust in god. Pray every day that God will reveal the things kept in secret to you. Good luck.
1 person likes this
@Shawchert (1094)
• United States
16 Jun 08
This is something that is hard to explain, because the situation is hard to manage.
But the way it seems, he still loves and cares for you. So it may not be likely he is cheating on you. Not to make you feel bad and all, but people do tend to show love but do things behind their loved ones backs. I know I've had it happen to me.
Best of luck anyways I'm sure he's faithful or else he wouldn't have talked to you the way he did.
1 person likes this
@sweetdesign (5142)
• United States
16 Jun 08
I have to agree that just because someone shows you love and affection doesn't mean they aren't cheating on you. It is part of the nature of cheating. It is part of the game for them.
1 person likes this
@WATARIKENJI (1534)
• Philippines
16 Jun 08
Its a good decision to trust God. You have a better grasp of the situation. mylotters will be here for moral support.
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29086)
• United States
16 Jun 08
Thank you.. I appreciate it...Although the information that my sister-in-law is telling me sounds true.. I have to go with my own gut.. And my gut is telling me that he is telling the truth, and that it just looks like he is up to no good, but he really isn't..
1 person likes this
@nilzerous1 (2434)
• India
16 Jun 08
It reads from your candid depiction that there is no problem between you and your husband. Both of you are going great towards maintaining a healthy family relationship. However, behind the screen someone is playing unethical role to induce a sense of distrust in your mind... and that is the real cause of worry. I suppose if such attempts are being made persistently over a span of time, some sort of distrust/disrespect might creep into so sweet relationship. So better try to figure out who did all those calls, or better even, keep the phone in a safer place.
And believe me, trust your husband. Your voice reflects a great sense of respect and love that you have for your husband. Besides, it reflects how much caring he has been for you and your kids. So, do not pay any heeds to those evil acts of some bad elements surrounding you. I have also come to the conclusion that they will be there to try doing all the damages, and I agree - truth will be revealed someday.
1 person likes this
@subha12 (18441)
• India
17 Jun 08
i think really your sis in law is the main culprit. what she did was not acceptable at all. but it is so sad. why she is doing so with her brother? i do not know her motive. in all these episodes its great that your trust for your hubby is intact. so its good and best. all the best.
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
18 Jun 08
Hi cream, that's good that you were able to talk and clear out things...And TRUST in the relationship is very significant and both of you need that, it will be very frustrating if you will know that your partner never trust you, so, since he is showing you his love everyday, there is no reason for you to doubt in his love! Just avoid entertaining rumors created by your sister-in-law!
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
17 Jun 08
I oculd sit here and play devils advocate or I could sit here and tell you everything is ok this is but part of the story in your relationship. I don't see how the two of you interact day in and day out. I don't know the dynamics of the brother and sister in law. I don't know their character and how trustworthy they are. The only advice I can give you is that trust your insticts and then just take it in stride. Meaning if you think he is cheating find out if you don't then put the notion away from your head. He is your husband you should be able to judge from his actions what he is doing by comparing them to when you were dating and first married. Just relax and take care.
@cream97 (29086)
• United States
17 Jun 08
Yes, this is what I will do. He says that his sister and brother are conniving. They can't be trusted.. I just did not know that she would go so far like this. I trusted her friendship.. That is where I was wrong at, from what my husband says..
1 person likes this
@yogeshdhusa (2236)
• India
16 Jun 08
hi cream, sitting here far away from you and reading this i feel you should give time to every thing till the truth is revealed.. I think your husband is trying to comfort you and if he was cheating then he would be angry on you and would have said " dont interfer in my matters" or any thing... still i feel trust him.
@travibabiesgirl (1690)
• United States
16 Jun 08
I have real trust issues from other people hurting me in the past. So it is hard for me to give you advice. The only thing I can say is usually deep in your heart you know if your man is faithful or not. Listen to what you heart truly tells you. I have a wonderful man whom I know is nothing but good and faithful to me but the devil tries to creep in and give me doubts because he knows I am happy. Don't let the devil do that to you and keep your faith in God to help keep you strong. Best wishes to you and your husband for many happy faithful years together.
1 person likes this
@Elixiress (3878)
•
16 Jun 08
I think there is something odd going on, I don't think that your husband is completely innocent to be fair, but I don't believe he has cheated or anything like that. It seems as though you have decided to stand by him, hopefully you have made the right decision =D I think that if he has the numbers in his phone then there is nothing fishy going on, because if there was something he would hide the number where you wouldn't be able to find it. My boyfriend has loads of girls numbers on his phone, but since most of them are ex's I am not bothered.
@cream97 (29086)
• United States
17 Jun 08
Yes, that is what he tells me over and over.. He told me, that if he really was hiding something, he would have not left his phone out like that in the first place.. To be honest with you, I never believed that my husband would ever cheat on me.. Since, his sister starts to feed and fill my head with her evidence, then I start to believe it..
@Elixiress (3878)
•
17 Jun 08
Well if you don't trust him the leave him. You will not be truly happy until you can trust him and if you believe that he may cheat on you then you obviously do not trust him as he says he will never do that.
@jonesy123 (3948)
• United States
16 Jun 08
Okay, playing devil's advocate here, lol, he leaves it openly laying around because it looks more innocent if you stumble upon the numbers. And his business associates excuse works. Even if he hides numbers of 'girlfriends' among all the real business associates. And he showers you with attention to dispell any distrust you may have...
It's just to demonstrate, one can look at any action from both sides of the coin. That's the problem when you suspect somebody of cheating. Only you are there and can judge the situation, the way he looks at you, the way he treats you, whether he even has time to cheat, lol. Take your cues from that and enjoy life;)
1 person likes this
@julyteen (13252)
• Davao, Philippines
30 Jul 08
every marriage, good or bad, are always subject to trials. yours is not an excuse on it. it's now on the couples' hands whether the tough times will make or break them. in your case, what happened make your marriage stronger. before you go into marriage, i believe the trust is already established, and that you have known each other well. so it's not so hard for you whom to believe. and always remember that smoke will find its way out, no matter how you try to hide it.
@matola (32)
• Tanzania
1 Jul 08
cream29,mabe you dont know this but i learnt it through my 20+ years of marriage. sometimes they cheat and realize they have done wrong and come back with more love than before,so dont sweat,just love him when he is there and dont think about it when he isnt as long as he is trying to show you he cares.
@guybrush (4658)
• Australia
1 Jul 08
I believe you know your husband well enough to know whether he'd be capable of the things your SIL is accusing him of. If you trust and believe him, that is all that matters - your trust is stronger than anything other people can say. He wasn't trying to hide his phone, and he keeps telling you he loves you and proving it in the things he does. I think you are right - if he is unfaithful, then the truth will be known. Good luck!
@myhairbow (48)
• United States
1 Jul 08
ive been cheated on many times and in my exsperience with this the guy stopped showing his love towards me he also wouldnt let me see his phone eithor so i dont think ur man is cheating.just my oppinion.