should i still feel like this?

You have every right to feel like you are not being loved like you should. I would have a serious talk with your father and tell him that it is bothering you that you do not get the attention you feel you deserve. If he does not listen, then I would stop communicating with him. I can understand that this may be easier said then done, but if he will not be a father to you then why should he be a grandfather to your children? I hope you sort this out, and Best of Luck in this situation. Have a Wonderfully Beautiful Day!

While it's not healthy for you to live your life that way, it's completely natural. My father left when I was 7 and has been trying to "make it right" ever since. But I still feel that I don't want anything to do with him, and I still don't want to be who he was. The best thing you can do is learn from your father's mistakes, don't be like him, and try to forgive him everyday. You don't need to forgive him, but letting go is often healthy and lets you focus on more important things: like your family.

You can't escape the fact that as a human being you have emotions and those you will never escape. I'm not an expert but it seems to me the best thing to do is to try to get as close as possible to him from where you are and see how that goes. There will be hurtfull times and other disappointments but you cannot predict how far this will go until you get there. The only way to compensate yourself for your childhood is a relationship with your parents in spite of the fact that you are now an adult. So, got for it, remembering that when you least expect you will probably get a fantastic reward if you are sincere.

Should you still feel like this? YES! and you may always feel like this. A part of a love you never got to nurture is still lying dormant in your heart. The things that you and your father could have shared stand out in your mind. Just remember, he may be going through some of the same things too. How many times have you heard the saying, "Reach out and touch somebody's hand, make this a better world if you can"? Let today be the day that starts the relationship between you and your dad. Talk to him as much as possible and share the thing you wish the two of you could have had. You never know, the two of you may fill in the gaps and build an awesome relationship. Go For It! Make the first move, time passes by too fast to miss out on love.

First let me start off by saying I am very sorry that this happened to you... now, I do think that it would be natural to have feelings like this towards him, especially since you said your step father was not the best father figure for you... Maybe you should talk to a therapist about it, I know they can be expensive, but they may help you to unravel your feelings towards your father... Or maybe you could just tell your father how you feel.. just be open and honest with him, and maybe he will come to realize how much he has hurt you by choosing the path that he chose... I hope things get resolved for you soon!

I hate to tell you this but I dont think you will ever get over it. When you experience a tramatic situation, you never forget it. Sometimes, when time passes, it starts to get easier to put those feelings on the back burner but your case is different. You have a constant reminder right in your face and it isnt going to allow those feelings that you have to subside. I dont see how a parent can think that they can just disappear and then walk back into your life and say im sorry with 5 million excuses for them not handling their responsibilities and then act like everything is ok. i am going through this with my sons father. He wasnt paying child support but I kept letting him see my son just for my own conscious and for my son but not that my son is older, (he was 10 at the time) I told his father that he cant see him unless he started helping me care for him. he hasnt called my son since. Thnakfully, I am with a man who loves my son and my son calls him dad. If the sperm donor (that is what I call my baby's daddy" ever calls me back, someone is going to have to pray for him because I am going to give him the tounge lashing of his life. My son is emotional enough and he has to deal with that? Are you kidding me? I dont know if I could ever get along with a parent that left me. I would harbor too much anger and resentment for me to able to enjoy myself around them and why should I compromise my happiness because they finally had a stroke of conscious? Anyway, I feel like if it has been 2 years and you still have the same feelings, it is only going to get worse over time. Maybe you would be happier without him in your life because it doesnt seem like you are happy now. Life is too short to be trying to please other people. you have to put yourself first because he did when he made the chioce he made and he found happiness. It is your turn.....

Hi graceandowen, If I am in your situation, honestly, I will write him a letter telling him all about what I feel and what I want to experience from him..You do not know that he is also waiting you to do the move, like acting like his daughter...Because of his absence in your life, you do not know that he is also shy to show to you his feelings as a father because he doesn't like you to reject it nor be insensitive about it.. Just try it, who knows both of you are just waiting to be treated the way you want!

Id my dad did that too me and suddenly came back into my life 2 years ago I'd still feel like that. I think anyone would. Best thing I can think of you too do is talk too him. Tell him how you feel and that you feel like your missing out on everything.

Your feelings are very normal and justified. Not sure if you will ever be able to get over this feeling without some therapy. I was blessed to have an amazing father who loved me and spoiled me. My mother always gave priority to my older and younger brother, because she was so in love with their father (we had different dads). I'm 28 years old now, married, and have a beautiful daughter but still feel that I missed out on times with my mom. There's nothing better than the connection a mother and daughter could have. My advice would to seek some therapy but also have him be more involved in your life. Make new memories with him and let him be a terrific granddad to your children. Give yourself time to come to terms with your feelings and then discuss them with him. Let him know that you want to be treated in the same manner as his other children. He might feel odd doing this because you have grown up. He might not know how to treat you this way because you are older and he has no experience. This is something that will take a lot of work and time. Be patient and understanding, but don't hold in your feelings, no matter how harsh you think they are. Best wishes to you.

I think you should still be feeling this.. If my father left me it 2 and i missed out on having a father i wouldn't want anything to do with him... I think it is perfectly normal that you are feel this way toward him...

im in the same situation dont cave in i show no remorse to be honest! he left when you wer 3 and now he doesn't have to pay bills etc so he decides to father you now.....thats completely sick i wouldn't let him back into my life neither should you!

I never realized there were so many people in a similar situation. I didn't meet my biological father until I was 18 years old. At first I was exstatic to meet him because I had these huge dreams growing up that he would be so much more than my Step father (who ended up adopting me). You could write to him, but the best thing to do is, sit him down, face to face and tell him how you feel. And tell him exactly why you feel the way you do. It will be one of the hardest things you will ever do. You don't know what his response will be, but you are his daughter and you deserve answers. Once it is "on the table" and out in the open, he will be forced to discuss this with you, and if he walks away, you now have your answer and will be much easier to move on with your life.