I have a sad story,and need advice please help

I'm wondering if living with your or your sister would be an option. This way you can keep an eye on him, and maybe that will limit his drinking. He really shouldn't be alone and the drinking does not help either. Maybe he can get a room mate to live with, someone who does not drink and can probably keep an eye on him too. This is hard, I do not think you should move him into a home against his wishes. He may hold that against you, as desertion. My prayers are with you and your family, in hoping that the right decision will be made that is suitable for everyone.

I think your Uncle is lonely. Why don't you invite him to live with you in your house. So that he doesn't feel alone all the time. He needs help and his relatives alone including you who can help him. I'm sure you can find a way to help him. I wish you good luck Marlena.

if he doesnt want to go into a home then dont put him there it will make it worse for him. now i agree something needs to be done though he cant keep going like he is. you should look into like peach tree, jordon health care etc. they are places to where a nurse comes in and cooks, cleans, and just spends time with them and take them places they need to go etc. that would at least give him a chance to be with others besides family too. try talking to him and see if he will go get help in a rehab maybe. all you can do is give the advice and try to be there and hope he takes it. he is an adult and he can still take care of himself so you cant make him do what he doesnt want and if you try it could make things alot worse. he needs a hobby that he can go to the cumminty center and do. or maybe join a club if he likes fishing or something. he needs to get out of the hosue and do things with people other then just family. if he doesnt want to go to rehab maybe see if you can get him to go to some meetings or something. he needs help i agree but it has to be his choice.

marlena I have two friends who had toput their mom in an assisted living facility as she was nearly blind and needed help with p reparing her meals and she likes it and her two kids also like it. they see her all the time'and she has a lot of freedom there but also there is someone there when she needs to take her pills she is diabetic also and as Isaid she is legally blind and now a widow. her two daughters come to see her daily plus she has a ton of different activities she can do every day and she has her own two bedroom apt so she can have a guest. she really is very happy there. before she fell at home and nobody was there for several hours . this way she is supervised and still has some freedom also.i think you and your sister should insist your uncle go into an assisted living place.he would learn to like it i am sure.

I'm sorry to hear of your uncle's condition and can understand how worrying it must be for you. I dont know how things work where you are buy, would he consider someone going in each day or a couple of times a week as a carer?perhaps they could ensure he has a hot meal and maybe tidy/clean for him a bit? Do you have a doctor or some other health professional you could discuss the situaton with? Would he consider attending a daycare centre once or twice a week to give him some interest and companionship? How would he feel about some sort of counselling (I would guess he wouldn't be keen but...) I hope you are able to help him and that you will not let your own health suffer. Take care.

First i feel sad that such a situation has happened to you. I would suggest two ways. One is that you do something to keep him engaged all the time. that may be by asking him to do things for you, or care your children or you can also arrange for picnics and take him out so that his mood changes. take him out of that mood or depression whatever u call it. and the most important thing is don't treat him like a patient. keep him happy and keep him engaged. by this you can slowly get him out of trouble zone. this is the simple and straight forward way. best might be keep your children around him. usually no body wants to be bad in front of children. children can give the most pure love and affection which can make somebody happy. the next would be the shock treatment. you and your family can plan a small drama. might be you put in his mind that you have some problem. it could be financial or health or ... related. by this he should start feeling more about your problem than his. thats is if somebody jabs you with a small pin it will pain. but when you have a cut in your hand and somebody jab a pin on your skin it will not pain. this is because the pain in the cut is more that the other. make him feel that you are in much worse situation that him. this will make him think outside what he is presently thinking. thus u can slowly bring him out of that situation. after all these make him understand that you love him so much and you need his morale support for the rest of your life. then he will surely change. act fast... i am saying all these because i lost someone i liked most. i wish and pray that you solve yours. don't forget to tell me once your problem is solved.

hi marlena,I feel sorry for your uncle.Why not try finding him a companion. May be with someone willing to share his loneliness, he might change his habits. May God bless you and your uncle.

I don't think he will be more happy after live with others. I know that one like to live in his own house and he can do anything he want. If he move to other's house, something may make him nervous. Although he may live a comfortable and safe life with you, you can't get rid of the depression in his heart. Aged People tend to live in his own house until he can't take care himself completely.