Should older children still have a curfew?
By goodhappens
@goodhappens (671)
United States
August 13, 2008 7:52am CST
My 19 year old had moved out a when he was 16, living with other friends, then his dad, he had dropped out of school,call me silly but I feel if you are grown up enough that you dont think you need school then you are too grown up to live at home.
Well...the 4 months ago asked if he could move back, of course I said.
Well he thinks I am treating him like a child since I told him with school starting for the other boys, during the week he has to be in and doors locked at 10.
He seems to think I am being unfair and unreasonable, says adult children live with their parents all the time now and I should let him do what he wants.
I may be old school but I told him this is my house and during the week if he cant make it home by 10 then the doors are locked and find somewhere else to sleep. He started to argue and I told he could find somewhere else to live if he wanted to do that, but this is my home and if he lives under my roof he has to follow my rules. Which include going to school, and being in at 10 during the week, so he has enrolled in a learning center to go to after work in order to get his diploma.
I do like to state things in that manner but to me that is just plain respect, and if he cant have the respect for me then he can move on.
I do not charge him rent or anything else for that matter. What is your take on "adult" but not so "adult" children living at home and rules?
2 responses
@juliefaye (1214)
• Philippines
13 Aug 08
What you did is just right! His being adult is not the issue here but there were house rules that he has to adhere or else he should look for his own if he doesn't want to be controlled. We parents wants all the best for our children and they won't realized it until they have their own kids too. Just be firm with your rules and i can't see anything wrong with it.
@juliefaye (1214)
• Philippines
13 Aug 08
They just can't realize that we are the one who is affected the most when something will happen to them outside the house.
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
13 Aug 08
No it is all about him right now, and how can I treat him like a child. Oh when he has his own, then he will realize how a parent thinks and feels
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
13 Aug 08
That is it exactly, didnt want to be harsh with the my house my rules but I cannot sleep unless I know everyone is home and where they belong so I can lock up and rest easy.
I had just had a sudden pang of wow was telling him to leave a too much, but if he wants to be so "adult" then he needs to be an adult and do it at his own place.
thanks, I'm good now and will keep firm :)
I have 4 other teenage boys that he is setting an example for and I cant have being in a bad way.
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
13 Aug 08
I must be doing something right, he just came home at break and apologized and said he understood as long as he was here he had to follow the rules and he is ok with the, hummm may help that his boss is my brother, think they must have talked, lol