Is a marriage that important? Its a piece of paper....

For me , I believe it is hard to mix love and marriage and I never wanted to try.I never dreamt of the wedding dress and the rest of it.Besides I have a very, very old fashioned view of marriage . I don't want to be owned or told what to do.I prefer being loved and respected and I fear that would never happen if I marry the guy.

Marriage is more than a piece of paper. In the Church, marriage is considered sacred, and has God's blessings and before when one faced the justice of the peace, or the civil magistrate, it too had a sacred ring to it. I blame the "marriage is just a piece of paper" on the lack of ceremony done by many civil ceremonies. If you watch the old movies, they went to the justice of the peace, the girl had flowers, the justice of the peace's wife played "Oh Promise Me" on the organ or piano. The ceremony had the "do you take this man," or "woman" and so it was rather like a non-denominational wedding ceremony except that the couples were not members of a particular church or temple. Now they just have you sign a register, get some witnesses, and it is just as if you live in Russian during the Communist regime.And marriage has lost its beginning. No wonder many civil marriages break up. They do not feel they are really married. It is not the walk down the aisle, it is the wedding music, the words spoken that makes it special. You do not need to spend a lot of money on a big wedding, have it in your home, have it at the park. Just have a few friends and family. Have a simple ceremony, then work at staying married.

After three marriages that ended in divorce......no I don't need another piece of paper. I have been living with my s/o for a little over 3 years now. We are happy, we live as a couple, treat each other with respect and love, and we share in the bills, and everyday living. He has also been through 3 divorces. Neither one of us are in a big hurry to go down that aisle again. We did agree that we would get married, if we were still together in 30 years, and considering we could make it to the church and still hear the preacher LOL

Some people are brought up with many ideas about marriage is. For me, I know that marriage is a sacred bond between a man and a women in the site of God. It is outlined in the Bible and it is something that He wants to bless on everyone who would like to recieve it. You mentioned spending big cash on a wedding. But there is a big difference between a wedding and a marriage. A wedding in the 1-2+ hour party where a marriage is everything after the ceremony is complete. I have to agree with you concerning spending the big $ on a wedding when it could be used to stregthen the marriage! I think you really should take a look at what the Bible says about the connections between 'marriage' and just 'happiness'. It is not the same message society will offer you!

I see your point dloveli. You said you are still getting married anyway?,then try to look at it like this(if your gonna do the wedding thing).You get to enjoy one big special day,with all your loved ones to celebrate your happiness and love for one another!Put the "piece of paper" in a beautiful plague and look at it for memories sake!Everytime you look at it, think of it as a day you'll always remember,let it stand for love and happiness, instead of it just being a piece of paper! I myself, got married to my first husband(we are happily separated now!) at the local magistrates office!haha.But, you know, it was still a special,memorable day for me to celebrate each year. I suppose the whole marriage thing was meant to unite under God,see I dont even look at it like that myself! Well, that is the upside, but there is the downside too. If it doesnt work out, you have a big mess with divorce and all that! Happy Mylotting

hmmm.... i think it is important, infact very important religiously.. because it keeps you away from adultry and such bad things.... u can ful fill your demand thru a legal channel.. every one wants a person a companiion, esp in old age...

Its a promise that we take befor GOD , if you think its waste then the deal is between you and GOD.. We due to legalise marriage we do have all paper stuffs if you have really want your guy to be your hubby then make a covenant with GOD that is what BIBLE speaks about.. I will surely marry my guy in church only if atleast i will legalise it

I never really had much respect for marriage "as an institution"...it really is just a piece of paper. If you love someone, it's not really important. I personally find the things people used to do to be "officially committed" couples BEFORE churches much more meaningful and spiritual. But you know.. I don't think it's for me either, to be honest.

well, that depends on how you or we choose our partner.. it depends upon the choice. that is why when choosing someone whom you are marrying, be sure that you are certainly and absolutely sure about it.. there is no turning back to it.. commitment for a lifetime is really needed in here.. and for me, marriage is as important as food,. we could live without food, but not that long.. hehe

Hello there my friend, dloveli. I think this topic has been discussed many times, but the interest surrounding it will always be there. I have always looked upon marriage as a consensus of 2 persons and to get married, one must be very stable in mind, heart and financial. Once these essences are there, then marriage would be something satisfying. But I do take note of some marriages starting out in happiness and ending in devastation. And I must say that my heart goes out to all these people. It's a 2 way road and throughout the journey of marriage to make it work, it needs these essence still as well. The best is to stay away from marriage until you are very prepared in any aspects. That's my opinion. Here is a bit of an information that I have put up in my discussion before. You might want to take a look at it: http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1451583.aspx

Im now 27 and in a relationship of 4 years. We settled down in our house 2 years ago but I am in no hurry to marry him due to the fact that most people I know that have been married have split up including my parents!! I would love to marry him one day but at the moment we are happy as we are!! I dont think many people are now into getting married and having a family. They just have the family instead. Maybe because they cant afford the wedding or they arent into the big commitment thing!! Thanks for sharing!!

me marriage is not important to me well i don't care what peole tell me but i'm leaving with my boyfriend without marriage. I just dont like to promise god to say those marriage vows but in a years after things wont work.. will getting married is a lot more responsibility. once you say yes resposibilities are like your tails..well but if you actually tought and find out that his the one for you and you could actualy spend your whole life with him go for it. me I don't want to get married because i don't want to get hurt, i don't want to get divorse. what i'm doing living with the man which I thought i could marry him in the future and trying to figure out things. if it works well maybe someday well get married.

I don't think that it's important.. now days people just don't get married to advoid spends that will become in nothing after a divorce.. I do think that if someone wants to spend the rest of the life with the persons that loves is no need to get married.. it's just a piece of paper that will bring more problems that anything else.. that's what I think

Ive been married for almost two years in a civil rite. if you ask me if I still want to get married in church, well, of course yes. Its not because of the paper but it's more on that. As Catholic, its still so special to be united with the man you loved and be blessed. Of course there are a lot who felt discouraged that after spending a lot of money for the wedding, you will end up with divorced. But what important is you had a good memory to cherish.

Actually to me, a piece of paper is not that important. Love and commitment shouldn't be based on a piece of paper. I believe my husband and I already has the commitment far before we signed on the paper. But one thing in my country, if we do not get married, then it'll be really difficult for our children to get the birth cert and also enter the school later.

WEll I was married to my ex and despite physical and mental abuse did all I could to keep the marriage alive until eventually I managed to walk away and give my son and myself more stability. My partner and I have been together 11 years this week and have been engaged almost as long! I do want to marry him eventually but it is not the be all and end all and if it does happen it will be at least 9 or 10 years away as we want our kids to be our witnesses! As for the piece of paper , well I think the comittment to each other is more important than that , it takes 2 people to make a marriage/relationship work and my partner and I have that whereas my ex didn't! I think different things work for different people and we should all do what works for our relationship! xxx

The meaning of marriage is far different in different areas of the world. If you think you can live together without having a piece of paper and there is no problem with society, you can just live together. However Marriage is most important people like us (India, many part of Asia). Because There are no other relationship and living together than marriage. If one live together without getting married is bad in our society and wrong as per our morals. To get as a partner we should marry. Otherwise we can be just only lovers, over night staying and much outing with lover before marriage is against our morals. I support the marriage, It is not just a piece of paper, it is a tight bond and an institution of building our family, our future, growing kids, educating them, etc. That paper is a certificate of marriage to show for some official records only, but our life is the married life. Marriage give more close relationship while living together is a loose relationship and it is like "I don't care". Married are agreed to live with them in their life, by accepting, adjusting, advising forgiving etc. Divorce is not a normal thing to be done for silly reasons, nowadays people do not understand the value of a relationship. Also as per my belief(Islam) that I love, We can find our own partner but do not engage in any physical relations, the actual relationship should only be a married life, without marriage they can't unite to live together. You may find difficulties in understanding my words if you think from your point of view, but if you can think from some other point, you can feel the beauty of family values and relation via marriage.

Marriage is more than just the wedding. I don't think a person has to get married to be committed in a relationship. The government and the laws should not dictate that people should get married. I don't need that piece of paper to tell me I am in a committed relationship. I have been married once and that didn't work out and I had to pay a big price to get a divorce. My next relationship, serious, we didn't get married but just lived together. I felt that I was married even though we didn't have that legal document that says we are a couple. In our hearts and minds we are married. Alrighty then, talk to you later my friend, Have a good mylotting day, Chris

The marriage certificate is just a piece of paper. Marriage should be of the heart. I have known people that been together for life time had children and grandchildren and great grandchildren with out the certificate. In my eyes they are totaly married. I have known many more people who go for the certificate. Their many marriages were just that, certificates. Many of them being married w/ certificate every time, more than once.

Marriage is sacred and relationship too, if you haven't married yet,. be sure you have right to choose a partner that will spend your life forever. Know her feelings,favorites or this person is very strict? Or maybe she is a patient person. Divorce is very forbidden in the Bible as Jesus said to the followers of moses that they change the law of having a divorce.