Question for women...

The fact that your dad's wife accepted your father inspite of the fact that he has a child is an indication that she loves him a lot. But I do understand that you have some negative feelings for her because you feel that she has taken your dad away from you, or maybe broken your family. This is the normal reaction. However, since they are together now and obviously your father also has strong feelings for her, it would be better for you to accept that fact so you can move on. To answer your question, yes I will accept a man who has responsibilities and I already did. His kids also hate me but I have already accepted that. But since I love him so much, I just bear it and hope for the best. He also accepted me who has more responsibilities but my kids (might) have learned to accept him. I really don't know their true feelings but they have stopped making a fuss about it which is good because it was such a burden on me at that time. I do know that whenever you express your hatred to the current wife, it affects your father who will be put in the middle.

If my fiance would have had a child when we met, I would have stayed with him. I love him dearly and just because he had a child I wouldn't turn him away. I agree though that the child's feelings need to be addressed first and fore most before any relationship is contribed. I think that if the prior relationship is over, and the child is aware of that then I wouldn't have a problem having a relationship with him.

well, for me your dad deserve's to be happy to.. are you mom and dad really married? do they have a happy relationship together? well, i dont know, if that happens to me and the guy has a child and he has a wife, of course, i wouldnt accept him. but if he has a child and he loves me so much and his relationship with the child's mother didnt work out and if i love him too, then there should be no reason why i wouldnt love him and accept him.. your dad loves you, it's just that he wants to be with somebody else, and if he doesnt have a healthy hapy relationship with your mom, then he will get that love and affection from somebody else..

It depends. It depends on whether the man is divorced, a widower or still single but have a child. If he is a widower, I might consider but it depends on how much I love him. Anything other than that, I will not consider. To get myself involved with a married man or a flirt is something I will not allow to happen.

Yes I would. My husband married me and I had 3 children already. My kids became his kids too. We talked to them alot to see how they felt and they didn't think of it as him taking me away from them. They saw it as gaining a whole other family because his family accepted them as their own too. How was your step-mom with you when you were growing up? My husband is the same to the 3 older ones just as he is to the 1 child we had together. He loves all of them the same and they are all treated the same. BTW, his grandpa told him that he was lucky cause his grandpa raised 7 step children but always called them his own.

Why not? If I love a man and he has a child I will have him and the child, that is what you mean? Or stealing a man from wife with child? That is a no no!

If I were in love with him, and he loved me back, then yes, I would take a man with responsibility. My boyfriend has a sister who is special needs, and he has to take care of her a lot, and I knew this when I decided to get involved with him. I do not regret being with him at all.

I hope my response doesn't offend you PurpleHyacinth, but your whatever feelings you're having or had should be directed at your father not his wife. I'm divorced and responsible for an 8 year old. I'm very much involved with her and there's no way in hell ANY woman is going to deprive her of that. Actually I never have given anyone the option of trying. I've just focused on my daughter for the past 6 years. Cheers, Stan

I personally wouldn't because I don't like kids, don't want kids and therefore wouldn't be with someone who has kids.

purplehyacinth hi your father must have had his reasons for remarrying and its silly to hate the woman he married,you were just a baby and you did not know why the adults all did 'what they did so forgive and dont let it make you sour.Why should an innocent child hate the woman your dad married? dont you feel that your dad had a right to be happy again? forgive and forget, grow up, no selfishness there. yours is selfish my friend.

I did accept my husband even if he has a child already. But the difference between our situation is I accepted the child also. My stepdaughter was only 5 years old when my husband and I got married. Since then, the child stayed with me and we treated each other as real mother and daughter. It's just a matter of acceptance on my part. I love my husband so much and same goes with him, why wouldn't I accept his past? Now my husband is working abroad, my stepdaughter who's in college now, is staying with my in-laws but on weekends she stays with me and his brothers.

it depends to the person. in my own point of view. i dont think i can. but im nothing against it. it just that i dont want a man with responsibility already. but im not closing my doors on to that situation. maybe, if im inlove with the guy and the guy is responsible, loving, matured and supportive. maybe i can. who knows.

Im sorry I can hear the hurt in your words.. All children no matter where or how they are conceived are gift from above. So yes a man or a women that has a child would be fine. When you love someone you accept all of them.. and if a child is part of the package...well more faces on the table and love in the house. I child will not hate you if you love him and let them know you are not trying to replace their mother.... You know that their daddy love you in a different kind of love. Be honest kids...can pick up on that really good. Remember children are innocent...Adults make choices whether they be good or bad.