parents should not suck the life out of you

Wow, I better take note of the author. I am all eyes and ears when it comes to any tips about child rearing and more. Yes you point is perfect reason for me to remember PAC. As parents we always have conflict with our children. Just like as a child (which I am to my parents) we always have conflict. Except now I am an adult and a mother to my children, yet they feel It is still their say how my kids should be raised and whom I should be friends with. Psychology is complex- is so true. I always wanted to read more books on psychology and children in particular Any other books you have in mind that can keep me in loop and be a good parent or at least passing. Thank you for your response.

HI thanks. I will be checking out these books. Hopefully Barne and Nobles carry them. Thanks

Yes friend, the book with 192 pages 'Games people play' The basic handbook of transactional analysis by Eric Berne,M.D is the one book from which I can quote even now, I will recommend you to read and read and understand. That is enough to understand others and to live peacefully by understanding ourselves. I have done my master degree in psychology due to my passion toward that subject, but never tried to practice professionally. My profession is Fiber optic technology, but still psychology drives to read more books. There are many books on psychology, but one more book you have heard about it is 'I'm OK, You are OK' and one more 'Understanding Human Nature' by Alfred Adler. These three books will give you more insights about you and the relationships. If time permits, I am thinking of starting a blog where different psychological issues will be discussed. Best of luck and happy myLotting!

Interesting phrase Prov 22:6 I hear that alot from other relatives and sometimes this exact belief is what put many children and their parents at war because parents get too caught up in the training and not realizing that it is not training but just an opinion and they need to let go and realize their children also has the right to accept or not accept the opinion. I have friends who is in their 30's and have not dated yet because of those surrounding them. I agree with you train up a child in the way he should go but not dictate what he should do. It should be guidance when neccessary and not a judgementtal one. Thank you for your response. Hope all is well with you my friend.

Thanks for that, and true it is! I'm doing very well thanks!

Right on! Sheepie. I got the same answers, except mine was more direct. They tell me "I am your parent, I know better. Don't make friend with so and so..." So it really made me think that my judgment was horrible, my choice of friends stinks, my self esteem GONE! I learn that when I grew up and had kids, I would not let that happen. I want to them to discover the "growing pains" because it is part of life. And make mistakes and learn from them. If we parents shield them too much, they never learn and expect us to do that for them for the rest of their life. Happy Mylotting. It is end of the month! Happy posting.

Hi rocket, I agree with you. Some of her answers are rudely expressed and she don't listen to you when you try to explain something. But i still listen becuase some of her answers are really good.

yes it is sad. This very same belief is what put a lot of stress and tension between my parents and I. My parents grew up in a generation where arranged marriage was the practice all over that they expect the same from me. When I grew up and refused to accept this, we had huge fights. Then, my children are granted alot of decision making power and choices for themselves that once again my parents say "I should just tell him what to do" Which I don't want to tell him what to wear or who should be his friends. Long story short, for the sake of my kids future and their ability to learn to make decision and understand their opinion are respected and heard I had to tell my parents to back off. And that has hurt my mother, she says I hurt her terribly.

Chabawel, Wow you word it just right. This happens all the time and you are so right to say that parents should be responsible for their decision and put aside their dreams for the sake of their children too. Great response Thanks

Yes “freedom” is the word. I once was a teenager and their advice was annoying, but now I am an adult and their advice has turned into Commands, not advice anymore. I agree with you, a annoyed child should not be neglected just because he/she does not like your advice. I just need to learn how to draw the lines between the two, when to step in and take charge (when he needs it) and when to let him try and learn from his mistakes.