Once married WOULD you...or HAVE you ever considered renewing your vows?
@Perspectives (7131)
Canada
September 23, 2008 10:40pm CST
This is a timely discussion for my hubby and me because we are renewing our wedding vows on the 27th of September. This is the third time we have done so since we were wed in July of 1991. In our personal and professional experience as life coaches and group leaders renewing vows is not something many do.
We have heard of those who have a re-commitment ceremony at 25 years but not ever 5-7 years the way David and I do. The reason we do it is we see how easy it is for couples to grow apart, take each other for granted or simple lose the "magic" they felt when they were first together.
As life and business partners David and I do celebrate the bond we have in large and small ways throughout the year. However, there is something really special about planning a re-commitment ceremony, standing before each other and reaffirming our love for each other in an intimate gathering of close friends and loved ones.
This event is particularly significant for us because a couple of years ago David worked through a variety of health challenges and it made us both appreciate the strength of our bond, love and support for each other even more than before. Now that David is healthy and strong again we have much to be grateful for. We don't have any family members left and our friends have become part of what we call "soul community." This gathering is celebrating our love for each other and the friends that have been there for us.
So that is part of the reason I haven't been around much the past couple of months. We have been busy working together to spruce up the house and yard for our Celebration of Love and Friendship gathering this coming Saturday.
I will respond to comments as time permits this week...but will be back with updates after the gathering on Saturday. I would love to hear what your views about our our idea of re-affirming vows whether you are married or not.
Is this something you would consider doing? If yes, why? If no...I'm curious why not if you'd care to offer you views either way...I welcome them.
Look forward to chatting with you again...I have missed being here and sharing ideas with the many valued connections I have made within Mylot Land.
Warm regards,
Raia
8 people like this
32 responses
@lexus54 (3572)
• Singapore
24 Sep 08
Greetings Raia, it's always great to see you around this forum. You have such a glowing presence here in the discussions you initiate that these discussions leave a lasting impression on us.
You gave us cause to celebrate this week. Not many people I know wish to celebrate and reaffirm their love and commitment or each other by renewing their marriage vows before their family and friends, and for you to make a commitment to do this with such regularity speaks of the great testimony of the bond and love you share with David. My wife and I are so happy for you both, and on this auspicious occasion, we wish to convey our heartfelt congratulations and wonderful wishes to you and David for lifelong happiness and togetherness. We will be together with you in spirit half way across the globe when you exchange your vows again on 27th August.
I have been married to my wife for 22 years. We have not gone through a vow renewing ceremony in all these years of our marriage, and not so sure if we will do so in the future. It may in part be due to the culture and practice here, where this is not commonly done. Regardless, we still strive to live our lives each day keeping our marriage vows close to our hearts, and observing them with all seriousness and sincerity. Each day we do this is a testimony of the breadth and depth of the love we have for each other ~ a love we discovered back in the early 80's in the years of our courtship.
So from us to you, our heartwarming wishes and heartiest congratulations, and may everyone who know you be touched and blessed by your lives.
Best regards,
Victor
2 people like this
@lexus54 (3572)
• Singapore
29 Sep 08
Dear Raia,
Thank you for your message, for which I have replied.
For my wife and I, it has been our pleasure to be sharing this moment with you and David in your re-dedication of love, albeit only in spirit. Your mention of the Valentine card I made last February evokes fond memories for me. In a sense, there is a common thread between the symbolism of your celebration this weekend and that attached to my making of the Valentine card, and at the very heart of it is the manifestation of love.
Yes, love is the greatest gift that anyone can give to another, and in our hostile world, it is such a vital ingredient in the lives we live both for ourselves and for the ones we truly love. That is why when you announced that you and David will be re-committing your love for each other at this weekend's ceremony, we are in unison with you in this celebration because it also reminds us that we should constantly be re-committing our love to those so dear to us, in whichever way that's meaningful and special to us.
Rgds,
Victor
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Hello Victor...how lovely to hear from you again. I just sent you an e-mail to acknowledge how much David and I appreciate your thoughtful and poetic addition to this discussion.
I also appreciate your acknowledgment about my presence here and the discussions I post. One never knows how things are being perceived and I am grateful to have such positive feedback. As I mentioned in my e-mail I value the connection we have made. You also add much depth and breadth to the subjects we discuss and I enjoy our on-line chats immensely.
I am continually amazed at how tangible the connections feel within this community. When I read your words..."We will be together with you in spirit half way across the globe when you exchange your vows again"[b][/b][i][/i]the strength of the connection resonated for me...and David when he read what you wrote.
When we stood in an intimate circle of friends in the garden David and I have co-created I thought of all the good friends I have made within this forum. Our gathering was a re-commitment ceremony for us...but it was also in celebration of the friends we value near and far...and that includes the wonderful bond you share with your wife.
I recall how delightful it was when you posted the discussion about the Valentine's card you made for her last year. I recall thinking what a statement that made to anyone privileged enough to read and see it.
For those of us who love and appreciate our partners the way we do I think it gives hope to others. There is so much conflict and polarity in the world. I believe that those of us who love with the kind of commitment, respect and honor we have within our marriages remind others that love is the greatest gift of all.
As you said of us...I am also sure that everyone who knows you and your wife is equally touched and inspired by your lives.
Thank you for the extension of your friendship and genuine exchanges. They continually enrich my life.
Warm and caring regards to you and your wife from both of us.
Raia and David
1 person likes this
@barehugs (8973)
• Canada
17 Oct 08
I've been happily married for 53 years on Oct 8th. My wife of 53 years is happy also. But we would not get married again, because we have no use for the wedding vows. Marriage is based on a Promise, and a Promise is an impossibility because Everything in this dimension is in a constant state of flux. In other words, 'nothing is permanent, except change.' If there is no permanence there can be no promise, because a promise surmises that nothing will change. This explains why more than 50% of all marriages do not last. So why Bother?
2 people like this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
6 Nov 08
Hi barehugs,
It has been awhile since we chatted being that I am not here very often anymore. Our business ventures are taking up more time but I do check in as time permits.
Your comments are always insightful and I appreciate them. I understand your position on the renewal of vows and agree with it in some ways. Yes, life and relationships are in a constant state of flux.
We accept that people come into our lives for a reason, season or lifetime. So yes, we agree and do our best to live in the now...but our renewals involve a celebration of how far we have come with the friends and loved ones who attended. It is also a great reason to gather and celebrate love, life and friendships with those within our soul community.
It is more about that..than kidding ourselves into thinking that what we promise may always work out. Having said that David and I have found that clear intentions do have a way of bringing things to fruition...even when they eventually change.
So for now we commit to each other and those we love and celebrate those bonds for as long as they are there...and it works for us and that is why We bother.
Cheers,
Raia
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
24 Sep 08
WELCOME BACK ! even for just a shory time!
I think it is great that you and David are doing this. SOmetimes I wish me and hubby did . But it never came up.
And he might have thought we did it once dont need to do again lol.
THere was different times in our lives that we did fal in love again wel for me any way lol.
After each time some thing happened we knew it was so great to have one another.
and I was hardly ever not by his side or him mine. Ya know even tho he has passed he was with me iun the operating room and after . Giving me that pat on the butt.
So glad that both of you have came along way on your lifes path hugs and blessings I will be there in spirit for ya know I cant make it up there hugs again!
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
29 Sep 08
Loved the pics and what you had to say to each other was very cool and really refreashing to read the love that you have shared and will share the rest of your lives!
As for me and hubby I think we have a timeless love that will live with me till I join him! hugs and blessings
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
2 Oct 08
Glad you enjoyed them. I know you were with us energetically and thought you'd enjoy hearing what we shared with those who were with us physically.
I absolutely know that you and your beloved have a love that does not need any outer ceremony to express the breadth and depth of who you are and how committed you are to each other...while he was here...and now into the next realm.
When it does come time for you to join him everyone who loves you will miss your presence here...but will also rejoice in the fact that you will be back in each others warm embrace. Hopefully though he and you will wait...you are so important to a lot of people and we love your presence in our lives too much to say "so long" anytime soon. However, life happens...and all any of us can do is "go with the flow" of it.
Anyway, David and I are enjoying some much needed down time. We are keeping our workload to a minimum other than commitments to clients. I check into Mylot for messages, do e-mails and respond to comments as I can. Will be more active here and finishing up the basement in the next couple of weeks.
Will keep in touch and arrange some time for a phone chat in the next few weeks. In the meantime...warm, loving regards...and thanks for being the great friend you are.
Raia
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Thank you for your big WELCOME BACK! Thank you...it is great to have some time to be here and chat with you again. Even though we keep in touch by e-mail it is fun to share ideas here as well.
From what you have told me about the bond you and the love of your life shared your bond is something that probably doesn't require the outward ceremonies. You and your hubby shared something many couples never do...and that love and support continues on as you have said here. With all the places you lived and ups and downs you went through the strength of your relationship lives on...that we both know for sure.
Thank you for your support, love and care for both David and I. I sent you updates and photos by e-mail today and trust you have received them.
I am busy catching up here and will be around more this week even though we still have a number of projects to complete. We are taking some much needed relax time before getting back at it.
I felt your presence at our gathering and that is why I sent you what we said and photos...you are a great friend and I luv ya!
Hugs to you..
Raia
@vanities (11395)
• Davao, Philippines
14 Oct 08
well i had renewed my vows 3 times i guess that is when i had joined a christian group and everything and the culminating rights was renewing vows..and i guess that one way that keep our marriage blessed despite of trials we had encounter we remained strong and fear in Him since we know what our responsibilities towards our family and the community spiritually and physically..its good to attend this seminar thing ..it keep us reminded our vows to each other..and our purpose of being married...
2 people like this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
17 Oct 08
Hello and thank you for offering your experiences and input to this discussion. I really appreciate what you are saying. My husband and I see our union as a way of growing spiritually and learning as well. He is my best friend, confidante and support and I am grateful that he has chosen me to spend his life with. Celebrating what we have with friends and loved one is something that works for us...and sounds like it does for you and yours too.
Thanks for sharing!
Raia
1 person likes this
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
25 Sep 08
Congrads! I think it great when two people still want to renew their vows.I think you are right, it is a great way to keep the " magic" alive.Me, I never wanted to get married. I didn't and I still don't think I could marry someone I love . Why? because the moment I say "I do, the magic would die. So , since I never wanted kids, why marry. I can see finding the eight guy and being with him for the rest of my life , but without a wedding or a marriage thank you. With that said , it is great to see there are couples that can mix love and marriage like you two. I wish you a smooth ceremony, fine weather, and a great honeymoon.Send my best wishes to David. Question.Will you separate from David the night before, so he can't see you or your gown?
1 person likes this
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
1 Oct 08
I am so glad everything went so well.What do you mean you don't have kids? 5 cats and one dog! To me that means you have 6!Say hello to David for me, and pet all the kids for me too. Talk to you soon.
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
2 Oct 08
Hi again...
Ah yes, a gal after my own heart. I agree with you our fur-babies are our "kids!" When the 5 cats are tearing around the house or all vying for our attention at the same time it definitely feels like a house full of children. They add a lot to life and being able to work from home they love having us around all day. I have included a photo of the five of them lying on our bed. Not often we can get them all at the same place...at the same time for a photo op. There is also one of Cherokee. Do you have any pets?
We have a large multi-level house with two separate stairways up to each section...so they all the animals have a lot of room to run around. Our dog Cherokee is a husky/shepherd cross and enjoys being out in the yard and go for walks. When we lived on an acreage we had 4 dogs...and now that the other three have passed to the next realm Cherokee is picking up on the cats' behaviors. Resonances...odd how they work out at times.
Anyway, I did pass your well wishes on to David and the pets and they all send their regards back. David has become quite familiar with the friends I make on Mylot...especially those that include him in their responses. So thank you for that.
It is good to be back in touch and hopefully I will be around more as we move into Fall and Winter here.
Take care...and thanks for dropping back I enjoy chatting with you!
Raia
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Hi again..
I enjoy our chats so much. You have a great attitude and inner confidence that I really respect. From your comments on this topic I value your ability to live life on your own terms and I agree with much of what you say. Before meeting David I felt the same way about marriage and kids. We don't have any either and never will...for a lot of reasons that I won't go into here.
Thanks for your acknowledgment about our bond. Yes, we are partners in life, business and love and we are together almost 24-7 being that we run our businesses from home.
Thanks for your warm wishes...all of which came true. We did have a smooth and meaningful ceremony, fine weather...and our honeymoon started today with us unplugging from the phones and spending quiet time together with our 5 cats and 1 dog all of whom felt very short changed because we have been doing so many home and yard projects this month. Having breathing space, listening to favorite music, looking at the photos of the event and taking in how blessed we feel is what we plan to do for the rest of the week. We are going out together Tuesday and will eat out. So our quality "connect time" without the hustle and bustle we've had will be our "honeymoon."
In regard to the separation...no we did not choose to implement that part of the tradition being that this is a re-commitment rather than the first time. We held the event in our garden and it wasn't a very formal event. David wore a sports jacket and I had on a lacy top, hat and jacket with black pants and very high heels that I kicked off after we ate.
Thanks for your interest and wonderful comments. I appreciate you!
Raia
1 person likes this
@markroderick (888)
• Philippines
17 Oct 08
Of course if we'll reach the 25th years of marriage i would renew our vows. Though im not married as of the moment but i'll probably renew it when the time comes and for me its a sign of real true love.
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
17 Oct 08
Hi and thanks for sharing your viewpoint. It is great to hear from people who are and are not married and hear what they either do...or would like to do in their respective situations.
Just one of the many reasons I love Mylot and all the people within this community!
Raia
1 person likes this
@jeweledbluerose (3061)
• United States
26 Sep 08
This coming October, my husband and I will have been together for 14 years (married 8 of those years). On October 14th, the day we met, we plan on having a small get together to celebrate not only the love we found for each other on that day, but love in general. Don't think it would necessarily be considered a re-commitment ceremony, but same in nature I guess.
We have often thought about a full blown ceremony a time or two, but never went through with the idea, since we have always found ways to keep the "magic" and "wonder" that is love, alive without having to go through that dreamy sense of reality that such ceremonies can bring about.
I cherish each day that I have with my husband, cause I know that at one point his time on earth will be over, and he will be called home. Sad to think of, but that's why I make it a thing to cherish every second I have with him, even the bad moments we have had, has only made us stronger bonded.
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Hello...how is your arm doing...hopefully better.
The event you are planning does have a similar flavor to what David and I intended at our gathering. This one was as much about the celebration of the bonds we have with our friends and community as the joy we have in each other.
As life and business partners David and I cherish the bond we have and feel fortunate not to have to work outside the home. Even though our offices are on two different levels of the house we are within shouting distance of each other. Being together 24-7 has kept the magic very alive and whenever we renew our vows it is to commemorate major milestones in our lives. With the return of David's health and well-being and an improvement in our finances we feel deeply grateful to all those who were cheering us on through our most daunting times. Our friends are our "soul family" and we wanted this gathering to acknowledge that...and we did.
So yes, like you we know our marriage is a gift that keeps on giving...and hopefully we will all have that experience for many years to come.
Wishing you and your husband advance wishes for continued health, happiness, peace and prosperity at your coming Anniversary date...and beyond.
Raia
@eaforeman6 (8979)
• United States
24 Sep 08
I dont think I will ever do that. I took them one time and meant it and dont think I will ever do it again. I think its beautiful for those who choose too. I just live the commitment to my vows everyday and never felt that I had a reason to repeat them!
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
24 Sep 08
Hello and thank you for offering your views in such an honoring, respectful way. Wonderful to hear that you are happy with the one time event. I also value your comment about "living the commitment to my vows every day."
Delightful addition to the discussion I appreciate it!
Raia
1 person likes this
@xiaomingzhang790822 (10)
• China
24 Sep 08
It has been three months since we married .To be frank ,I am satisfied with my life although we are not affluent enough to afford a big house or a car. Three humble meals a day didn't upset us .In my point of view, mutual respect and sincerity are much more important than anything else in maintaining the harmony between husband and wife.Obviously it is next to impossible for the people to resist the lure which includes the spiritual enjoyment as well as material enjoyment, therefore in order not being afflicted by the funny pursuit we had better purify our heart each day and prevent the dust from blinding our eyes .Happy marriage doesn't need any empty vows but commitment to our dear family members are indespensible , otherwise , the souce of happiness will be dried day by day .
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
I appreciate your opinion and the points you put forth. I am unclear what you mean by "empty vows." Could you please explain before I comment on that.
Raia
@GloomCookieLex (6073)
• United States
25 Sep 08
Yes, I fully intend on have vow renewals. Several in fact. First and foremost, my wedding was a complete disaster and I want "my wedding day" so to speak. Secondly, I want a 10-year anniversary renewal at DisneyWorld. And lastly, weddings can be so vastly different and fun and I'd really like to try them all. I had so many vastly different ideas when I was planning my wedding that I want to try them all. Also, my husband and I read that the record for most vow renewals one couple had was 86 and
we want to try to break that record! lol
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Hi and thank you for your uplifting, fun and very informative addition to this discussion. I love your enthusiastic approach to the idea of renewing vows...you bring a whole new dimension to the subject!
A re-commitment ceremony at DisneyWorld sounds fabulous. I also am blown away that the record for renewals is 86. Great that you and your hubs plan to break that record...go for it!
Cheers and all the best to you...and him!
Raia
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
26 Sep 08
Hi Raia,
We haven't really thought about it actually but I don't think we would. We have been married 7 years and it's still going strong. Umm we might take a romantic vacation when we hit 10 years since we never had a honeymoon but in terms of renewing our vowels, it's not on the cards :)
Nice to hear from you again :)
Rachel
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Greetings Rachel...great to be back in touch with you as well. The summer has passed so quickly. Hopefully now that a lot of our major house and garden projects are complete I will be able to Mylot more.
I miss hearing from you and others within this great community. Hope everything is good in your world as well.
I value your opinion on this topic...a romantic vacation together sounds great..hope it happens!
Take care and we'll hopefully be more in touch.
Raia
@ailema4ever (2668)
• Finland
24 Sep 08
Hmmm...I've never thought about this, actually, since we've only been married for almost 2 years. But I think it's a good idea, since it IS true what you say that we tend to lose the "magic".
But then again hubby and I don't like ceremonies like this, so maybe a private ceremony would do...just the two of us renewing our vows to each other he he he...
Have a WONDERFUL Celebration of Love, Raia!!!!
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Hello again...
Great hearing what you think about the idea. The gal who responded before yours has been married about the same length of time. David and I waited until our 5th wedding anniversary for the first one.
The other one was when we returned home after living out in the bush for a couple of years and we had been out of touch with a lot of our friends. This one marks a significant celebration because of all we overcame in the last few years. Also as the gal above said...it is a great reason to have a party with friends.
So thank you my friend...we certainly did have a WONDERFUL celebration of love and friendship. Good to be back in touch.
Big hugs and warm, caring thoughts!
Raia
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
17 Oct 08
Hello again..
Your new Avatar is soooo cute...just like you! Thanks for your happy thoughts and words. Yes, I did receive your e-mail and I responded but haven't heard back. Did you receive it OK? If not let me know and I will resend it.
I am happy to be back in touch...and let me know how things are progressing with the special plans you and your hubby are making and working on. (wink wink!)
Big huggers,
Raia
@ailema4ever (2668)
• Finland
29 Sep 08
Yes, it is a great reason to party with friends! ;-D I think it's hard for me to think of doing this celebration with my close friends as they're far away from me (in Indonesia, Germany, Holland, USA) he he he...
Glad to hear that you had a WONDERFUL time, Raia!!! I sent you email the other day. Hope it arrived safely!!! :-))))
Love,
AMEL
1 person likes this
@zigzagbuddha (4601)
• United States
24 Sep 08
I have never even considered getting married once, let alone twice to the same man! Hahahaha, have fun just the same!
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Hi again.
Never once...so twice would not be an option...very true. Thanks for your fun filled wishes. We did have fun. I sent you our sugary event and photos by e-mail. Hope you don't gag! (chuckles)
Raia
1 person likes this
@zigzagbuddha (4601)
• United States
29 Sep 08
Hi again back to you!
Nah, I wasn't gagging, hehehe, I wasn't even rolling my eyes! It was very nice, and I share all the sentiments in that 'what we have learned' section!
It's been so long since I've talked to you here on MyLot I don't know how to act! 
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
2 Oct 08
Hi again,
Great to be back in touch and chatting here...as well as our musings by e-mail. I appreciate your input...and glad the sentimentality of the day did not create a gag reflex. A few of our guests said they were tearing up...ah yes, hopeless romantics are alive and well in our little corner of the universe. David is going to compress all the photos we took so I can pick and choose what I want to share with friends by e-mail. We haven't forgotten...just busy. Mingling photos of guest to follow later this week. Although the week is going fast...hard to believe Survivor is on again tonight...felt like we just watched it a couple of days ago.
Some who attended admitted they would love to be able to get up in front of others and share their feelings but they cannot...but they delight in being able to see us do it. They say it reminds them that love, respect and speaking it out loud is a good thing. It was a great day and would love for you to have been there. As I have said before..we really do "get" each other..and I respect you and your opinions...even when we disagree. Mark of "authentic" relating in my view.
I am perplexed about your "how to act" comment. Just be yourself...that is what I love about you...upfront, open, expressive...you go girl!
Raia
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
27 Sep 08
I just wanted to say congratulations your reaffirmation ceremony. I think that that is a beautiful idea and you seem like a real great person. My fiance and I are not yet married but will be in the next year as of yesterday. We are happy together and do intend to have a more extravagant ceremony later when we have more money. I think that I would consider doing this as a rekindling every few years, and if not going to such extravagance we would atlest spend our anniversary together and in a special way.
I hope that you had a very great day on your special big day! Good Luck To You!
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Greetings Rachel...great to be back in touch with you as well. The summer has passed so quickly. Hopefully now that a lot of our major house and garden projects are complete I will be able to Mylot more.
I miss hearing from you and others within this great community. Hope everything is good in your world as well.
I value your opinion on this topic...a romantic vacation together sounds great..hope it happens!
Take care and we'll hopefully be more in touch.
Raia
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Sorry SomeCowgirl...something strange happened when I posted my comment to you. I always copy before posting and somehow the comments I made to Rachel...#29 ended up where yours should have been.
So ignore that first one...and let us try this again. First up, thank you for your positive feedback about how you perceive me. I also value your input on the idea and how you shared where you are and what you and your fiance would like to do.
Good to hear you are happy together...that is the most important thing. The ceremonies are great...but only if they truly represent the joy couples feel within their bond. I watch some of the Bridezilla reality shows and cannot fathom what is going on with some of their strange dynamics.
Thank you for your well wishes. Our event was wonderful. The weather was warm enough for us to renew our vows within the privacy of the garden David and I worked so hard on together. We had an intimate circle of friends there and we truly did have...A Celebration of Love and Friendship.
May you and your fiance manifest whatever you wish for yourselves and hopefully a long, happy, healthy life together.
Best regards,
Raia
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Hi and thanks for your comments. Our approach is something we enjoy...but it is not something that appeals to everyone. We live with the belief that everyone has the right to do what feels right for them.
Raia
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Ah Polly...I know you of all people know that life and love are so precious. Thank you for your warm wishes...we appreciate the heartfelt way you send them. We had a lovely day, great weather, a lot of fun and laughter and we feel very blessed. The number of genuine wishes coming from Mylot land confirms that we are all connected in this One-Song called life.
I am so happy to know that your life is going so well. May the happiness you are feeling right now also continue for many years into the future. Great to be back and chatting with you...big, warm energetic hugs coming your way.
Raia
@Celanith (2327)
• United States
25 Sep 08
My husband and I would like to renew our vows and have never had the opportunity or finances. We have been married for 39 years and our wedding photos never turned out taken with a dysfunctional camera. We only have one that did. We wanted to renew on our 25th and daughter and son both Got married that year so the money was not there. Maybe for our 40th and then 50th. I want to dress as a real bride again but oh I neeeeeed to lose 190 lbs. What a struggle. Hubby said he loves me anyway but it is causing health problems. I have too much stress and life keeps throwing things at me beyond my control. Hubby and I need some our and me time. We have not had our home to ourselves for 9 years or most of 9 years. One person moves out another in of kids, or siblings. Also have grandkids. I have hypothyrodism. Fibromyalgia and arthritis. I want to go dancing and swimming. Both cost money we have not got.
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Ah...my goodness you certainly have a lot of daunting challenges. From the sound of it you and your hubby share a wonderful bond and go through life's ups and downs together...and that is a true blessing.
David and I have found that our joys are brighter and our burdens lighter because we have each other. Whether you renew your vows publicly or not...it would appear that you renew them every day in large and small ways by facing what comes along together.
I sincerely hope that your health and financial situation improves so you and your hubby can have more of what you wish for yourselves.
Warm regards,
Raia
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Thanks for offering your views and experience. Different strokes for different folks is what keeps life interesting.
Good to know you and your hubs and happy in the life you have created. May that continue for many years to come.
Raia
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
24 Sep 08
Hi Raia, I know one couple who renewed their vows after 5 years and another who did it after 25 years, so you might say that it isn't very common in our neck of the woods. I like the reason you give and would agree that many couples do seem to drift apart after a few years. I think that anything that helps keep a couple together and 'happy to be together', is a great idea. Blessings.
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Hello my friend,
Great to have your input on this topic. I enjoy your reading about your views and this one is no different.
Our events are usually as much about our appreciation for friends and loved ones as it is about us...and this one certainly focused on that theme. We had a great day, wonderful weather and feel blessed by the bond we have with each other and everyone who participated.
The many warm wishes from our Cyber friends within the Mylot community really confirmed that friendships from the heart span time and distance. Thanks for your wishes...we are definitely "happy to be together" and hope we are blessed with many, many more years of togetherness.
All the best to you and yours,
Raia
@moneyandgc (3428)
• United States
24 Sep 08
My husband and I have both been married once before and had weddings then. When we got married it was just the two of us and the Justice of the Peace. It wasn't a very good day for us.
My husband has wanted to have a real ceremony to create good memories of our "wedding" for some time now. I told him that maybe we will do it for our 5 year Anniversary. I would like the baby to be old enough to be a part of it. She is only 2 now. We will be married 4 years in February.
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Hello,
I appreciate hearing your viewpoint on this subject in combination with your personal experiences. It seems very romantic to me that your hubs wants to create good memories of a wedding.
David and I had our first re-commitment ceremony at five years too. We only decide when to have another through the outworking of events in our lives. We are in a really happy, healthy, grounded place at this stage of life and maybe we will go with that from now on...and just have fun gatherings.
In any case I wish you, your hubby and baby the best life has to offer. If you do decide to do a re-commitment ceremony I wish for you all that you wish for yourselves.
Best regards,
Raia
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
Well that is an honest response...thanks for offering it. Welcome to Mylot as well.
So long for now.
Raia
