Stay single or be in love?
By Paulyn Davis
@paulsy (1263)
Philippines
October 2, 2008 10:33am CST
I have heard some people say that for every man there is a woman, and for every woman, there is a man. I don't really know if this is true. There are some people who choose to be single for life, and others who don't choose to be single for life... buy they just can't find the right person to share their life with. I am the type of person who is truly happy sharing my life with someone I love. What about you, are you a person who prefers to remain single? Or do you want and choose to have someone to love and love you back in your life all the time? Why?
13 people like this
45 responses
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
2 Oct 08
When it comes to love, nothing really is final. I'm not trying to sound so negative in this sense, but I'm just trying to be realistic.
There are pros and cons to every topic, and here it goes for me:
If you're single the pros are:
a. You wouldn't need to rush home or worry about someone if you are having fun and they're away.
b. You need not ask for anyone's permission to do something nor would you feel the need to consult him whenever you need to decide on something.
c. You can have all the time in the world to satisfy your needs and desire, not that I want to be selfish or something, but the mere fact that when you want to be alone, you can do so, without anyone worrying for your sake.
as for the cons of being single:
a. You need to consult that someone always. If you don't want misunderstandings to arise.
b. At the end of the day, when friends go home, you will be alone even if you don't want to.
c. When you need someone who you can just talk to (who would certainly want to listen without being forced), you can't always have your way.
Pros for being inlove:
a. You can share your life with that someone.
b. Days are much sweeter, knowing there's someone inspiring you to do things.
c. Happy times, and tough times will always be shared with someone.
Con:
a.b.c. You will always have the possibility and the chance of getting hurt.
So, there it is. There are a lot, but I just summed them up. But if I were asked which I would prefer. I'd actually prefer being in love. I'm the type of person who cannot live without talking, I need communication and conversations. I need the moments of listening and the moments of simply sitting down or lying down in bed talking nonsense. I thrive on those moments. Though there is a huge risk of getting hurt, I dare say 'at least I did all I could, the rest is now out of my hands'.
Good luck!
5 people like this
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
17 Oct 08
Hahahaha.. Of course everyone would like to be in love, but the question there is: "how long would you be in love?"
Life isn't always a bed of roses you know. And a relationship doesn't stop from being in love. There's a certain point in the relationship when struggles do come in, trials and everything. And most people I know (who are married) would always say that it's better to stay single, and those who are single would always say that it's better to fall in love.
So, in conclusion, no one would ever know which is the best actually. As they say a person's desire is insatiable. So regardless what you give or have, sooner or later you'd always be curious and have a lot of what if's. But, if you have no hang-ups before you did decide on something, then those what if's are just moments that are part of your life, and you would feel happier and content of what state you are in.
By that way, thank you for marking my response as best response. I truly appreciate it!
Have a great day ahead!
@w1986114 (158)
• China
2 Oct 08
I want to share my life with someone I really love. However, as a matter of fact, I am single, I even can't find my first love. It seems that love is far away from me. I hope the sentence that " for a woman, there is a man" is true. But who knows, maybe I will be single forever.
4 people like this
@THKOhio (329)
• United States
2 Oct 08
I truly believe that there is someone for everyone. Just because someone chooses to stay single, that doesn't mean there is no one out there who would be their perfect match. It just means they chose not to look...and that their perfect match will now have to settle for second best. As for those who don't want to be single, but just can't seem to find the right person, perhaps they just aren't looking in the right places, or it's just not the right time yet. I had to wait until I was 38 to find my one true love....and that was after mistakenly thinking I had found him a few times before that. I am definitely a person who chooses to have someone to love and love me back. I think that it just makes my life fuller and more complete.
4 people like this
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
2 Oct 08
Who says you can't have both? I'm single, but love my guy. We've been together 8 years, but choose not to marry. We were both married before and our marriages were nightmares, so we choose to stay together out of love, rather than out of marriage.
3 people like this
@bamakelly (5191)
• United States
2 Oct 08
I think that it can just depend on each individual and what they want out of their lives. I am a married woman and prefer to be with a partner who I can count on. I would rather not be back in the dating scene again. It seems like it could be a lonely life.
I have never really been alone. I have been married twice. This is my second marriage. I would say that to each his own preference. Some people might rather be single and not be involved in marriage at all. I enjoy having a man who loves me and accepts me and I know is coming home.
@tapnaroy12 (875)
• India
2 Oct 08
hi paulsy
i believe love is the most wonderful gift of the lord to the mankind. Obviously everyone isn't lucky to love or be loved because of different socio economic problems. But i guess everyone wants to enjoy the bliss of love. I also do and luckily for i have one to love and be loved. Those who are preferring to be single, they must have some reasons for that, i bet. But i'm happy to share my life with someone whom i love.
4 people like this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
3 Oct 08
hi paulsy!
before, i had this idea that i can go on living even if i only have a child and not without a husband. ^__^;; i thought guys were just good as boyfriends and not as husbands. but as time passed, i think i'm changing my mind about it. sometimes i think it would be nice to grow old with someone you really love. ^__^
i have always like the feeling of being in love and being single. even if at times, being in love means being hurt. its fun to be single because i am free and i can do anything without someone ordering me not to do this and that, not to go there, anywhere. but sometimes, i think that if i would find that someone meant to me in this lifetime, then i wouldn't mind sharing my life with him and grow old with him until we die. ^__^
1 person likes this
@paulsy (1263)
• Philippines
3 Oct 08
Well, Secretbear, enjoy your single life while you're young! When the right time comes, you will get to choose the right one to share the rest of your life with! Wish you the best!
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
2 Oct 08
[i]Hi paulsy,
I've been single for 29 years and I enjoy it very much but during those times, I know that I will be very happy if I have and find the man whom I will be with and whom I love and I met him! LOL!
I love to share my feelings, I love to have someone whom I can talk to and it's wonderful to wake up each day having the man that we love beside us...I know it's very satisfying..LOL!
But, I have friends who also choose to be single that because they are happy about it but until now, they didn't meet the guy whom they want to spend the rest of their lives with![/i]
3 people like this
@izathewzia (5134)
• Philippines
3 Oct 08
I think it is better to say that there are women who are cut to get married and still, there are women who are cut to stay single. Depending on what she believes in and on how she accepts it. I am one of those who were born to get married and have a family- because I already has.
@planeswalker (102)
• Singapore
3 Oct 08
haha, i am a person who dun wanna be single for life but not yet found the right person. currently in the process of getting 1 thou. i believe that every person need another person to be their some kind of soul mate. i believe it is good to be sharing a life between people.i would love to get my special someone some time soon.
1 person likes this
@yenwie84 (1344)
• Malaysia
2 Oct 08
If I want to choose either to be single or in love,I would definitely choose to be in love. I like someone cares and loves me. Maybe I am a very dependent girl,who always seek for attention and cannot live alone. Lol. I always enjoy the cares and loves from my boyfriend. I feel I am very blessed to have him by my side.
@AltheGreat2430 (2716)
• Philippines
3 Oct 08
Hi there! I prefer to have someone in my life to love and be love back. Share everyday life 'till both of you gets old. Go to bed together, take a bath together. lol. Someone to take care of you when you're sick. But, I prefer to stay single till I reach 32. That would be 10 years from now. I just love being single right now. LOL. Happy posting!!
1 person likes this
@smacksman (6053)
•
2 Oct 08
There is often too much 'Hollywood' and 'chic-lit' attached to love. Too often a true loving friendship is turned down because one of the parties does not match up to the clouded specification of the other.
In this world there are hundreds of people who could make you happy and provide companionship for life.
They just may not look like Brad Pitt or Catherine Zeta-Jones!
@DaddyOfTheRose (2934)
• United States
3 Oct 08
Well, there is a whole spectrum of attitudes on the issue. Commitment-phobic to commitment-obsessive. I think it is good to find someone to love and spend your life with. However, some people take things too far. They think there is 'one true love' for them. There isn't. There are billions of people in the world and likely a million or more whom you could fall madly in love with if you only met them. But, if you find someone whom you love and can share your life with peacefully, then you make a decision and move forward (never looking back.)
Sharing your life with someone is a great thing, for me. Other people don't share so well. Still others are always out looking for 'something better.' I know of one woman who is married but says (which I find terrible) that she knows her husband isn't her perfect match. She seems to be half-wistfully wondering who out there in the world was her 'true love.' I think that is a terrible distraction which keeps you from making the most of the marriage you have.
But, that's just my humble opinion from one limited point of view. Your results may vary.
@paulsy (1263)
• Philippines
3 Oct 08
I guess that's the point in being matured enough to choose the right person, and to make that firm decision to share the rest of your life with him/her, right? I mean, when you decide to get married, you truly believe that this is the one person you will share the rest of your life with, and nothing, not your past nor anyone else you happen to meet in the future, will make you change your mind about this decision. That way, there will be no regrets, and you both make the most of the marriage you have.
When parents say "you're too young to be married!", they do make sense, don't they?
@paulsy (1263)
• Philippines
3 Oct 08
I'm knocking on wood... I pray I will never have the need to say those words to my teenage daughter in the near future!
@DaddyOfTheRose (2934)
• United States
3 Oct 08
Yes they do, to a certain degree. Unfortunate that the kids in this equation can only think, "They just don't understand."
@nutanjain (898)
• India
2 Oct 08
well i think persns cant stay alone for a long time and there eventually a tiem come when you meet your mate and this is the most of the suprisingand graceful moments of ones life as it puts you into vibes and you just cant resist to be in his arms well in short i do not ant to reamin singel and i have met some guys but i am searchin for my soul mate and my search continues
@lanlan011 (701)
• United States
2 Oct 08
I believe there is someone out there for everyone. Some people are too impatient to wait for that special someone and they are in bad relationships. I dont want to be single all of my life. I do love the ability to flirt with guys but it would be nice to have that special someone.
1 person likes this
@jimssaftytips (507)
•
3 Oct 08
im 43 years old im tired of the single life. Im raising an 8yr old with the help of some close family and friends but i want to get married or a relationship. I feel that its time to find love