Do You Find It Hard If No One Talks To You?
By Brian
@wolfie34 (26771)
United Kingdom
October 4, 2008 1:23pm CST
For once I found it hard to come up with a suitable title for this discussion, so I thought I'd type it in afterwards and hopefully it will come to me, like the proverbial light bulb switching on!
I go to the gym 5 times a week and when I go training NOT one person speaks to me! I go there and do my cv (cardiovascular training) treadmill, bike and the cross trainer then I go upstairs and work on the weights.
I am there for about an hour and three quarters and for the whole period NO one talks to me and I don't talk to anyone! I get the 'vibes' that no one wants to talk
Could you go to a place where NO one talks to you? Would you find that comfortable or uncomfortable?
I am used to it now and it doesn't bother me any more, I can get on with what I want to do, but I guess the gym is not a place where people talk much
Do you go to a gym, is it the same as I describe it, or is totally different?
Do you think gyms in general are like this, or is this gym strange?
Nope still can't think of a catchy title sorry!
8 people like this
33 responses
@Humbug25 (12540)
•
4 Oct 08
Hi there wolfie34
How about 'Happy talky talky happy talk'? Bit late sorry!!
I don'r go to the gym but I used to work in a health club and generally people are busy working out and listening to their own music or the music was always too loud that people would have had to shout to be heard! I don't think people want to be disturbed whilst they are concentrating on how red they can make their face go, I am sure you are an exception to that though wolfie!! When my son first started school, I remember standing in the playground waiting for the bell to go and having no one to talk to now I think all the other mum's would wish I would go away!!
3 people like this
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
4 Oct 08
I had the same problem at school being a male teacher's assistant in a primary school none of the women felt comfortable to talk to me! Mind you the teachers were as bad too, why do you think I got out LOL! I think I should take my Ipod me thinks!
3 people like this
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
4 Oct 08
I think the women frighten the men off! I was the only male TA and believe me the children were wonderful to work with even the horrors, it was the adults that were the problem! I chose the 6 and 7 year olds because they were the best age to work with. I could put up with 30 of them compared to one adult!
1 person likes this
@Humbug25 (12540)
•
4 Oct 08
Yes I would take your ipod with you most definately. I think that is really cool that you were a TA I wish there were some male ones in my boys school. My eldest has a male teacher and I must admit I only talk to him if I have to because he is a bit of a dish and get embarrassed talking to him!!
2 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
4 Oct 08
Well to be honest it would make me feel uncomfortable because even in a Gym I have known People to talk now and again, maybe not all the time but at least a few Words so yes that would bother me
Gissi was back at Vet yesterday he was in a bad way but is better now and I think and hope recovering
Love you Sweetie xxxx
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
4 Oct 08
I loved the gym I was a member of in Essex, Gabs, it was privately owned and I had my own gym buddy there! This gym I go to is council, it's not the same and it's run by teenagers as well, or am I getting older LOL! Sorry to hear about Gissi, give him a big Wolfie hug and kiss from me please, love you both xxx
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (160978)
• United States
5 Oct 08
When I went to the Y before, in the swimming area, and water classes, people were friendly. If I went to the Universal Weights and cardio room, no one talked to me, but they talked up a storm to one another, to the point of being annoying, in my opinion. Kind of like when people are talking on their cell phone in public. I just do not like to hear all about it.
@seabeauty (1480)
• United States
4 Oct 08
I don't go to gyms anymore but when I did, I did find it hard. Then again, its hard to talk when you are working out. I joined not only to work out but to meet people but I find it is not the best place to do this. It is better to bring someone.
2 people like this
@elemental69 (1561)
• Ireland
4 Oct 08
To be honest wolfie, I think I would be grateful for the quiteness lol. It could all boil down to jealousy.... You look good with little effort..... other gym members are bound to get jealous!!!! :-)
@nannacroc (4049)
•
4 Oct 08
It depends where I am and what mood Im in. I don't go to gyms so can't answer you on the bit about whether all gyms are the same.
If I'm in a no speaking mood, it wouldn't bother me. If I wanted conversation, I'd start one. If there were still no replies I'd read a book.
2 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
5 Oct 08
Hi Wolfie,
I think what you experienced sounds perfectly normal to me.
In fact, it would only be strange if people start talking to you.
The reason is, no one talks to strangers here. If you talk with someone, it's because you need something or that person needs something or you both know each other. It is quite rare for 2 strangers to start talking barring several exceptions.
So if you want people at your gym to talk with you, first initiate the conversation and then you both will become friends. The next time you meet, then someone will talk to you.
Besides, the gym is not really a market. I much prefer to concentrate on my own exercises and enjoy the soothing music played. I rather talk with you all you want after the gym over some high-calorie food or coffee.
@thuhuong (823)
• United States
5 Oct 08
I have actually been to the gym a couple of times with my husband and yes, it seems to be quiet besides the sound of machines whirring or people panting. I guess the intensity of concentration is most active in such places and I found myself just putting on my headphones and listening away to my own rhythm rather than search around for someone to talk to. Then it somehow becomes this all-knowing hunch to just do what you have to do and go home.
No one seems to be interested in what you're doing besides the teacher or trainer who is speaking to you.
@gemini_rose (16264)
•
4 Oct 08
I do not go to the gym, have never stepped foot inside one at all actually, but just reading and thinking about what you said I would actually consider a gym to be like that. I think that if I went to a gym I would not want to talk, just go and get on with my thing, so I would find it quite comfortable. I would have to ask my mum what her gym was like to know if it is a normal thing.
2 people like this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
5 Oct 08
hi wolfie I wouldnt really like that either. I went to a gym that was also a rehab place for a few months, but people there seemed fairly friendly to me maybe because I was being pummeled andpoked and rehabbed like crazy. some of the routines were not withour an ouch factor. I was getting physically therapy as I had had a shoulder joint replacement which is a bionic devise of metal and plastic, and had to learn how to use my left arm again. anyway I think my groans and ouches helped to break the ice with others there.
@angelia286 (2029)
• Singapore
5 Oct 08
Nope, I don't go to the gym, and had never stepped foot in one before! So I have no idea of how gym-goers works. Sorry about that! Guess I am just too lazy to even considering paying money to people just to exercise. Lol. And gym memberships in Singapore is not cheap either! But I am thinking that for the money that people go to exercise, it would be definate that they are not there for socialising. So, I am guessing gyms in general are like that. Breathless people just don't have much energy to talk, don't they?
Well, i would still go places where nobody talks to me. To me, it is perfectly fine to be alone in my own world sometimes, with no worries about making topics up. For once in my life, i can enjoy the peace of being alone lost in my own thoughts. There are times when we just don't feel like talking, and times whereby we are just too lazy to talk. So to me, I don't mind that at all! Even sometimes, I welcome the silence of just going about doing my own stuff! It's real serene and nice.. Hmm.. Time to get lost to the unknown where nobody knows me!
If you want, you can always be the one to strike a conversation with the person exercising next to you? Sometimes people are just shy to talk to strangers, or they find it weird to make the first move (literally speaking!) and needs you to break the ice for them! You might be surprised to find a brand new friend just by a smile and a simple hello!
Hehe.. take care and happy mylotting!!
1 person likes this
@1hopefulman (45120)
• Canada
5 Oct 08
We have a little gym in my building and whenever I go and somebody else comes in most people will say a few words and then get down to business. But once in a while I'm able to have a conversation. Probably most people just want to concentrate on their exercises.
2 people like this
@Metalchick (1391)
•
5 Oct 08
For the last two and a half years I have been attending my gym as regularly as I can and I must admit the first year or so was very quiet no one said a word people just tend to get on with their workouts and left me well alone.
However a colleague of mine started going there so I started talking to him whenever I saw him down there...after this it sparked numerous random conversations with different people. Spoke to one woman once recently who had just joined and she was amazed at how long I was on machine for...an hour on cross trainer doesn't seem that long but to new comers an couple of minutes is a struggle to some on this piece of equipment.
The more I go now the more people I am beginning to know. There are a few odd types down there which never say hello they won't even smile when encouraged.
The only problem now is I find I work out much much harder when i'm not talking to anyone and this can get a little annoying when people come and chat to you and all you really want to do is get on. Remember I was chatting to one guy down my gym about a year ago and i'd just finished on the chest press. He was nattering on and not wanting to sound inpolite I listened know full well there was a queue forming behind him willing me to get off machine. So i'm in two minds it's good to talk to people down there but you have to get balance right or it will be more of a social gathering than a workout.
2 people like this
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
18 Nov 08
I do not go to any gym right now. But had I been going there and going for a purpose, I would ignore it all and take it in my stride just as you did. Even though it's asocial place but it matters less when and if there is no talking going on around there. Having said this, it wouldn't be a fun place for sure. Little bit of mingling makes it fun and makes it so much above routine. Isn't it?
And wolfie, that was a darn catchy title! I thought you were going to talk about something more serious and killing!
@eaforeman6 (8979)
• United States
8 Oct 08
I am not the biggest chit chatter person but everyone wants to talk sometimes. It would seem weird if noone talked.I dont go to a public gym because there is a small private one here but noone is ever there. I would like to thnk someone would talk at least alittle....
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
8 Oct 08
[i]HI wolfie,
When I was single, I joined friends to go to gym and since it's a famale area, we talked a lot..LOL! Even during the session of every after break!
Anyway, I can handle places where no one would love to talk..it's okay with me but I will always start a conversation especially when I will see or meet someone whom I am comfortable to talk with![/i]
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
5 Oct 08
Yea, people usually go there to concentrate on hitting at machines.