Excuse me but your anger is misdirected....

I don't get angry with people on the phone that often but a few months ago, we had a satellite service that ripped us off big time. We ended our service with them because they didn't want to fix our receiver. We didn't have a service agreement with them either since we had been a customer for over 6 years. Well, out of no where about $250 came out of our bank account without our knowledge on our bank card and come to find out it was them. Believe me, I was NOT happy! We called them so many times and every time they gave us some other reason. First they tell us because we upgraded our reciever and that added a new service agreement for 2 years even though we had it for 3 years. After I told her that, she then asked me if we ever moved while we were customers because that would give us a 1 year service agreement. I told her that we did move at one time and so she was going to tell me that was the reason until I told her that the move was 2 years ago so that 1 year would have been up. After talking to about a million and a half people, we finally got to a top person and we were told that it was supposed to be taken care of. We still have not gotten our money back and are still fighting them on this. If a person starts talking to me like I don't know what I am talking about and start treating me like I'm stupid, I let them have it and I don't care. I am not going to go through something like this again and have people just taking my money. So if a conversation starts going this way, I don't take it.

Hi whywiki, I think that we all are guilty of this from time to time! I try to keep my anger in check, but it sometimes gets the better of me. Not so much as it used to though. I try to be extra understanding when I am dealing with people who work in customer service because I have worked in customer service myself and I know how miserable people can be. I used to get screamed at, cursed at all the time. People would blame me for things that I had no conrol over. The fact that I had a psycho abusive boss who made us lie didn't help the situation either. I can't think right now of a specific time that I have let my anger get the better of my at least not lately. As I said, I am really trying to work on controlling it. I had a very serious anger problem and I have had anger management therapy so I am practicing what I have been taught! My counselor would be so proud!

Please tell your co-worker that I thought s/he came up with an absolutely brilliant answer. I love it!!!!!! My husband used to do stuff like that, and I took pretty much the same approach. My Dad did this when I was little, and still tries. Now that I am an adult, I just don't take his crap. I stop and think very carefully before I say something. I know how it feels to have misdirected anger aimed at me, and I am not going to do it to someone else. My good example has also helped my husband.

Usually I speak my mind out and dont allow this thing to happen. So I really hate it when others take out their anger on me. I don't allow it that close family members take out their anger on me instead of being angry with someone else. © ronaldinu 2008

I try very hard to remain calm when dealing with customer service people as it's usually the corporation that they work for that I have the issue with. I must admit though that there was a time not too long ago that a customer service rep. from our cable company accidentally took almost $300.00 out of our bank account because she'd double billed our payment by phone. That didn't make me so angry, but it was the fact that she lied and said the matter would be resolved within the next 24 hours...it took almost 3 weeks to get our money back! Unfortunately, they're the only cable company that is allowed to operate in our town.

It would have to be an issue of massive importance for me to take task with a shop assistant ,they are there to do a job,like we all are and as long as they carry it out to the very best of their abilities then that is all we can ask,we are not able to change the policies of the shop or the company,so therefore directing our anger at the shop assistant is rather silly,she /he would never be able to make any serious decisions.One of the best examples that you see of abuse at customer services is at the airports,the staff there have to put up with such a lot of verbal abuse,but they have prior training on how to remain calm,not to lose their temper and to turn the other cheek,but many is the time that the people who have checked in too late for their flight etc have been extremely rude.

well, it happens very often to me as well that i have take the crap from the customers... as i work in services department and deal with the customers directly, i can't avoid that... it can be so tiring mentally and i just basically tell them to stop talking and let me have a chance to talk... if they keep on yelling, then i won't serve them and will just call my manager to handle the customers... take care and have a nice day...

Hello WhyWiki! as a person that deals with the public I have found not only by experience with the public but personal as well, my opinion is that by the time we get to customer service we are often frustrated and at a breaking point. The stress in our lives are so high, every little crinkle in the fabric is felt like a belt buckle whipped against our brains. Yes that anger is so often misdirected at the wrong person. WE call Customer service Who is the mouth of the BIG BAD WOLF. We must conquer before we are devoured. I am as guilty of this as the next person. We need someone to take hold of us sometimes and shake ups down and grab us back into reality.

Interesting approach. I have not tried that one. I usually wait until they have got the anger out of their system then try and come up with a solution. I have only ever lost my temper with a woman once and that was when she was screaming down the phone at me and would not stop. I had to yell at her to get her to stop yelling and listen to reason. The trouble is that I have never accepted the premise that the customer is always right, they are not and I will not break the law or the rules just to keep them happy. However, in my work at an educational institution I did not have many customers who were abusive. Most of them were sensible rational people.

I love this, will have to try it the next time a customer abuses me LOL

As someone who works in customer service i am on the receiving end of people's misdirected anger....I can tell you its made me develop a thick skin!!! I never used to get angry towards the colleagues who i passed my complaint on to, however when it is something i feel warrants a serious complaint i just politely ask for head office's address and send them a letter!!! The abuse that some customers think they have a right to give you is disgusting, I usually go to the other extreme when customers are being rude and i'm sickeningly nice!!! They find it so difficult to scream and shout at you when you are smiling and using all the 'oh dear how terrible for you' & 'oh no'!!!How they dont realise you are being soooo patronising and sarcastic is beyond me.....perhaps they are so caught up in their anger they dont realise!!! Iv had things thrown at me and alsorts, I even had a lady telling her baby 'isnt that lady a horrible, evil b*tch' just because she couldn't get her own way!!! iv only walked away from a confrontational customer once and that was because she touched a nerve with a comment she made regarding my children....all I can say is that it was a good job there was a desk between us!!!! I had her escorted out of the premises by security I dont think they realise when they are so angry that you are a person with feelings too and sometimes fully understand their dilema but there are limits on what you are allowed to do to resolve their issue! hugs Jessica

I know exactly how it feels when someone directs their anger toward you. I also used to work in customer service over the phone and some of the people were very angry toward me. Anyways, I know better not to treat any person that way espeically customer service- it's not their fault. They are just doing their job in trying to HELP you, not make things worse. So why be angry at them?