could you help me polish the writing to be printed?(just make it native, thanks
By freshrainer
@freshrainer (284)
China
October 24, 2008 5:53am CST
This year, I am responsible for English Corner on a famous english newspaper in China. My job is to teach the national high school students how to write in the simplest English. I am a Chinese, and I really need your help, really. Hope you can polish my writing.
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Dear Sir,
I heard that you are the architect of the new subway. Here, I'd like to offer you my suggestions. First, the entry and exit of the subway should be easily made out. To our disappointment, finding the subway in the big city often takes much time, just because of both of entrances and exits are hidden in some corner of the street. Worse still, the signs can't stand out compared to others. Second, traditional steps to the subway should be replaced by lifts. For one thing, it can save passengers much time; for another, it will be convenient for the disabled.
wish you to have big success.
yours,
Freshrainer
2 people like this
5 responses
@staysee34 (94)
• United States
24 Oct 08
Dear Sir,
I have heard that you are the architect of the new subway system. I would like to offer a few suggestions. First, the entrance and exit to the subway should be highly visible so as to be located easier. The signs should also be more prominently displayed for easier location. Secondly, traditional steps should be replaced by lifts. Not only would this be a time saver for commuters but also makes the subway more accessible to those with special needs. Wishing you much success in this endeavor.
Sincerely,
......
1 person likes this
@freshrainer (284)
• China
25 Oct 08
I really appreciating your writing. thank you. though some words are new to the students, they can be slightly changed. I believe the students will learn much from this writing.
1 person likes this
@tryxiness (4544)
• Philippines
24 Oct 08
Hello I will also add something to this.
[b][i]Dear Sir,
Greetings!
I have heard that you are the architect of the new subway. For a smooth flowing subway I would like to suggest the following:
1) More visible and prominent entrance and exit of subway stations. This is so because it is hard to locate the subway stations.
2) Replacement of traditional steps with lifts or escalator for it to be friendly to the elders and even to the different-abled individuals. Lifts and escalators help save time.
Sincerely yours,
(your name).[/i][/b]
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Hope this could help1
1 person likes this
@freshrainer (284)
• China
24 Oct 08
I will use the words: more visible, locate, to the elders, for a smooth flowing subway.
thank you, my friend
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
25 Oct 08
You have the best coaching here. Where else can you get international tutors giving you tips on good format of English writing on the spot when requested but in mylot. Good idea
@freshrainer (284)
• China
25 Oct 08
yeah, mylot, or rather, the known and unknown friends here are all my teachers. I got so much from them. I feel on top of the world.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
25 Oct 08
heres mine. Dear Sir: AS the architrect of the new subway,
I would like to offer you these suggestions. First: the entry
and the exit of the subway should be easy to find. We had trouble'finding the subway in the city.It took much time to find as the entrances and exits are hidden in some corner of the street. Worse yet, the signs don't stand out as compared to other signs.Second suggestion: replace traditional steps to the subway
with lifts. This would save the passengers time, and would
be more convenient for the disabled too.We wish you much
success. Yours, Freshrainer. I hope I have helped a littlel
@piebueno (1)
• Philippines
25 Oct 08
Dear Sir,
I heard that you are the architect of the new subway. I am writing to you now to give my suggestions on some things i noticed about the subway.
First, i suggest that signs for entry points as well as exit points be stratigically placed on proper spots to easily guide the people where to go.
Second, i noticed that this new subway have no lifts which can help the people save more time during rush hours and lifts will also provide convenience and accessibility for elders and the disabled.
I am hoping for your kind consideration on these matters.
Thank you.
Freshrainer
@freshrainer (284)
• China
25 Oct 08
thank you. the phrases such as rush hours, guide people where to go are easy to understand.
