submissive or head of household?
By KYEEDAH1
@KYEEDAH1 (139)
United States
October 29, 2008 9:35am CST
Are you a submissive type of wife? Do you bow down so to speak, to all of your husbands requests, cannot make household decisions? Or are you the one in charge of things dealing with ther marriage and household? Or maybe you and your husband are evenly share roles and responsibilities, including decision-making. What are your experiences like?
1 person likes this
11 responses
@kbeth4 (11)
• United States
29 Oct 08
We have a pretty equal relationship in terms of power. Honestly, I don't WANT the responsibility of being the "head of the household," so I usually will let him have the final say on most things. I see it as too much responsibility and I gladly give him that power. However, I'm still pretty opinionated and he respects that and definitely listens to everything I say. So far, his final decisions are pretty much aligned with what I think anyway... :)
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@danishcanadian (28955)
• Canada
17 Jun 09
If you are so alligned, how is "the final say" too much responsibility?
@faln_angel1205 (1192)
• United States
29 Oct 08
Im definitely not submissive and though he makes the money, i guess i would fit under head of household. I would like to say we are pretty equal in decision making, but he prefers i handle the money and the bills, so it really gives me the main part of the decisions, as i know what we can and cannot afford. As for chores around the house and things..yeah i do most of them but i prefer to, and if ask him to help he does...most times..lol
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@walijo2008 (4644)
• United States
29 Oct 08
I agree with you faln_angel1205, thats the same way it is in my house, he makes the money, but I'm the one in charge of the checkbook, and making sure all the bills are paid, he says I run the house. As for chores too, I do most of them, but like your husband, mine will help if I ask him, he's always done that. I don't think I'm submissive at all...
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@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
3 Nov 08
I would have to say I'm mostly the head of household. I'm a stay at home mom, he makes the money, but I pay the bills, do the shopping, decide what's for dinner, decide how much money he has for gas, decide what activities I'm paying for the children to participate in, etc etc. He doesn't really like decision making, but if it's anything major I will at least ask for his input.
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@Shar1979 (2722)
• United States
5 Nov 08
We are even in sharing roles, responsibilities, and even decision-making. Even when he's tired from work...he would wash his plate after eating or he'll wash the dishes I left in the sink. He says I already work too much at home so he don't mind helping. I sometimes am submissive but not all the time. I know my rights as well.
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@lovelyvelle (639)
•
6 Nov 08
I can never be a submissive person to anybody, I like to be incharge of most things. I had experience living with a partner but he won't decide anything without me knowing and he is always inquiring me with everything that he is going to do. Because he don't like that we will just end up having arguments. I am not a bossy kind of person but I just can't be submissive.
@danishcanadian (28955)
• Canada
17 Jun 09
My husband and I discuss absolutely EVERYTHING that relates to both of us. If the other is not involved we do our own thing, but if it involves both of us we discuss it until such time as we both completely agree on something. He may not totally agree to things my way, and I may not totally agree to thinks his way, but when that happens we manage to compromise, and meet in the middle. We don't believe in gender roles.
@djd832001 (124)
• United States
29 Oct 08
I am a submissive wife. Being submissive is a sign of respect to the husband. It is not a bad word. My husband and me discuss matters and we both make decisions that are right for our family. The bible tells wives to be submissive to there husbands. To me being submissive is part of God's arrangement. But husbands should not abuse this word. This does not mean for a husband to treat there wives as a slave and beat them. Being submissive is showing respect for your husband and his decisions. Men also have to in subjection. The bible tells thems that they have to submissive to Jesus. Ephesians 5:22-25,28-31,33
@danishcanadian (28955)
• Canada
17 Jun 09
I've read that verse, but it was written by an imperfect human, also a sinner, Nobody is perfect. When Jesus Himself appears to me and tells me to submit to my husband, I'll believe it.
@djd832001 (124)
• United States
17 Jun 09
true it was written by an imperfect human but the Bible was inspired by God. And not only I'm submissive because the Bible tells me to do so, but thats how a marriage should work. Its not like my husband bosses me around and treats me like a slave. Its a form of respect for the man to show him he is head of the household. He is the bread winner of the family so he should have a say so on what goes on in the household, and their our responsibilities as a a wife that I have to keep the house running the way it should. We work together like a husband and wife should and doing that things are more organized and loving in our household.
@wanderer086 (759)
•
29 Oct 08
I am certainly not submissive and never could be. I have been married for 39 years and our marriage has always been a partnership. I always dealt with money when my husband worked away but we usually make major discisions together. I think it depends on the country and culture you come from a lot. In some cultures women are always submissive but in the UK women are meant to be equal although I do not think that is always the case.
@tiffrocks33 (71)
• United States
29 Oct 08
I am not a submissive wife. I am very much opininated, but not bossy. We share the decisions, he pays the bills because I dont like to. I help our little girl with homework more. I would say we are pretty even. If I need help with the house he helps.
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