My past relationship still disturbs me...

I don't think of my ex in a miss him love him kinda of way. I did for awhile but it has been almost two years since me and my sons father has been broke up. for awhile after he left me I thought I was going to die and was just totally freaked out that I was going to have to raise my son on my own. But I started working more spending more time with my son and friends and family. I started to go back to school to do something for me that I had wanted to do but couldnt while I was with him. It will get better. I have to say that he does creep up from here and there and it really bothers me when I see men carrying their little boys around or playing with them at the park. Plus I am in a new relationship with the love of my life and I wouldn't get back to my sons father for anything. everything happens for a reason we just have to find that reason and go on with our lives. But since I have been in this relationship I have had trouble with trustig him not because of something he did but something that my ex did to me in the past. so one way or the other he is always going to come into mind every now and then but dont let it get to know just tell yourself that you deserve better that there are bigger and better things out there then him. its going to be hard at first but it gets better.

i believe breaking up with some one is the hardest thing to do. but at times it may be necessary. life doesnt end there. i know its easy to say but to live through it is very difficult. but do believe me when i say life doesnt end with a break up. there are more things to life. and who knows may be some day you may find love again.

I think it is normal. Every relationship we enter, we invest in it physically and emotionally. And it's really hard to forget a person you once loved. Somehow, that person will always be remembered because you once shared something.

Hi Jleivang, i think what you feel right now are all normal for a broken hearted. We cannot easily forget those moments even though it is mean or special. It's a part of our life. What you can do is to end those haunting moments where in you struggle with so much pain and disturbs your functioning. It's a choice you have to make.Nobody will ever haunt us for so long if we do not allow it that way. So stop it right now, and give your self a break. You do not deserved it. Ask for God's wisdom and courage to have a normal life again. After all the hurt you have been through, It is still you who have power over all your past experiences. You have the power to overcome it and move on. God will lead you and guide you, if you will ask Him. And don't let your past live with in your presents. Take it one at a time, don't forced your self to hard though. With prayer, everything will work just fine. So have a choice right now and move on. God is with you. God Bless.

Is he your first love by the way? Anyway, one year is a such a short while away and when you really love someone, it's not easy. But you have to learn to let go and start anew. Sooner or later you find a better and suitable partner for yourself. In the meantime, be strong, life must go on. Go out, meet friends and mingle around... Make yourself pre-occupied always and get involved in something useful. So as to make yourself busy and have no time to think of him.. Good luck and all the best

try dating again, it may help a little you know instead of dwelling past mistake,you should move along and find yourself new healthy relationship. There are lots of guys out there who would happily fill your heart. Me included :), nope just kiddin'

it is with many people who have broken up. its not that only you feel this way. it means you loved him deeply. as you broken up, ypu can't forget those moments.

Hi there Jleivang! I think that it's perfectly normal for people who doesn't get over their past relationship in a short time. It all depends upon the person's personality, the surroundings including the people around you and also the past relationship itself. I think that if you have been trying your best to no avail, maybe it's time to seek professional help. It doesn't mean that there's something wrong with you mentally, of course, you just need some guide from the experts so that you can recover from the break-up easier.

It's hard to get over past relationships, i had a boyfriend for 8 years he was mean to me when he was drinking, hardly ever worked trashed my stuff and now after 7 years of not seeing him i still sometimes think of him. It stays with you forever i think course they memories.

First of all i would like to tell you to stop grieving for a person who has left you. although you have not said wha texactly happend and who th eguy was ans where he has gone an dwhy ahs he left you, but from your grieving i feel he has left you for someone else. Am i right? If he has, just forget him and get on with your life. There are something swhich are ot worth grieving over. Secondly time heals all wounds. Give yourself time. Engross yorslef in some thing that will take you remind off the past. Thirdly, try as far as possible never to stay alone. always have someone along, either a friend or a relative. Within a year you will be a different person. more confident, more sure of yourself and better able to cope with the situation. All the best.

Well, my dear. I guess it is normal. It will take time before you can remove you past relationship from your system. I fully understand how you feel, because I have been in that situation a long time ago. Time will only tell. But if you really want to forget about it, you should focus to the other aspects of your life. And try to be more open to do other things. Don't push yourself too hard that you want to forget about that person because it will just make it harder for you and even lose yourself in the process. Suffering is a part when we lose someone so important in our lives. Let it go my dear. You still deserve to be happy.

I couldn't tell if its normal, but my ex girlfriend that i still love with a passion. The kind of passion a painter has for a canvas or a child has for life or a father has for his children. Eventhough its been over 3 years i still think of her everyday and every moment. I can still feel her hair on my face, the smell of her perfume on my pillow. This beautiful, sweet, wonderful, loving, and life liveing woman is getting married. I had just found out a few weeks ago, and i have done nothing but hate myself for hurting her. She was the one thing in my life no matter what was going on if she was there life was worth something, life was worth living. If only she knew how i still felt about her may things would be differnt. Well in all honesty maybe, just maybe I can finally put my feeling to rest and move on with my life.

Breaking up is hard to do. I just realised how messy they can be. Once I got hurt by a girl and it messed me up for most of that summer. Afterwards I understood why she did it but that did not stop me from hurting like hell. I try now to make sure I never treat anyone like how she treated me. For some reason there's this void between the way a boy and girl thinks and it causes problems which can make a good relationship just go bad on you. I always try to be fair but I'll be truthful and say girls are just difficult:-)

i completely agreed with you i also felt the same thing.but my situation also bothering me,i don't know what to do,my problem is I'm still in love with my first love and its really awkward because i have a boyfriend.and i don't want to him to feel the pain that i encounter with my past relationship.i don't understand this feeling I'm being centered with two guys who i love the most. i love them both but my past relationship is really bothering me.i don't know who can help me about this feelings..and its suckzzzz....when i read your column i realize that I'm not the only one who felt the same thing.i think lots of people do felt the same thing...and i think I'm silly because i cant help my self falling in love with my past relationship.i know its not right because i have a boyfriend..i know i can handle this situation that I'm going through.i just want to share it with you guys....