Do yo believe grown men should cry ?
By ronnyb
@ronnyb (6113)
Jamaica
December 2, 2008 7:59pm CST
This decision is split along several points of view.One they are humans and all humans should show emotion ,two,showing emotion is a sign of weakness and not a luxury afforded men who were given responsibility to care for his family and three, crying shows the sentimental side of men.
The first issue is an inevitable consequence of human beings but there are those who see men as some super creature and who should be able to control this emotion.They may even take it a step further and enumerate the circumstances which may overwhelm this creature and this stops nothing short of death of a close loved one.This now begs the question what circumstances and how much crying should a man do?
The second issue seeks to tie in ability to take care of family garner respect and show emotion.Many seem to think that ability to take care of one's family is somehow linked to his ability to be in control and hence of his emotion.They argue that if man cries he will loose respect of his family and hence the abilty to control and lead them which is like forsaking his primal purpose.
The showing of emotion is not viewed by all as a bad thing ,many women would welcome this in their man.However, they are the same ones who say they like a man who takes charge and would shun a man who cries for everything
The questions therefore are should a man cry ?,what are the circumstances if any that justify crying and how much emotion is he allowed ?
5 people like this
17 responses
@dodo19 (47317)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
3 Dec 08
I think that grown men have as much right to cry as anybody else. After all, they are only human. Crying doesn't make them less of a man. I could understand why they might prefer to do it private, but that is their right. Why shouldn't they cry if they want to? Why should we think less of them if they cry? Those are things that I would like to know and haven't fully understood. Every human being on this planet, man or woman, are entitled to their feelings. It is their right as a human, a person, as an individual, as a living being.
1 person likes this
@bantilesroger (341)
• Philippines
4 Dec 08
Yes, I believe grown men could, should, may cry. For what reason, how long, etc. should depend on each culture and context and cause.
I don't know if some cultures have practices that serve as substitutes for crying. What I know through book reading is that there are cultures that allow their men to cry with grief, and yet, their societies remain very strong. Whatever the case, crying is a natural expression that should be provided an outlet or a cathartic equivalent, or else the person or the society will go crazy.
1 person likes this
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
3 Dec 08
We have a song called, "it's not a crime for a man to cry." and I think it's ok for a man to cry, but just under some certain circumstances, like the loss of a beloved one or kinda that. Personally, I don't like a man who cries over trivial things like a woman. Oh, that'll be too emotional a man for me. Men should really try to control their emotions even though he can cry sometimes.
As a girl, I don't cry often and I can find a way to express emotion rather than cry. But after I cried for something and I will definitely pull it off, coz cry seems a hard thing for me. If a man can cry, why can't he overcome the thing that makes him cry?
@jazel_juan (15746)
• Philippines
3 Dec 08
there is nothing wrong with crying..no matter who we are, male or female could cry anytime they want...crying does not degrade of its gender..its shows us how human we are..we are huamn beings who cry, break down..for me a man that cries is more human than someone who pretends not to cry and acts tough, atleast that person is trying to be human and himself.
1 person likes this
@daydreamer20 (1688)
• Malaysia
3 Dec 08
There's no wrong with crying even though it might show a weakness for the guy. But how do you define weakness, is another thing. Someone might say crying, for a guy, shows that the guy is emotionally weak. But maybe one should think that the guy is brave enough to show his emotion, and not just hide it away in order not to make others laugh at him.
For me, if I'm really sad, I'll cry a bit. Not to the extent of crying loud and wailing type. That's a bit too much.
@suzzy3 (8341)
•
4 Dec 08
Crying is a common and necessary emotion to let out the stress,If more men cried there would be less widows in the world.I was having the same conversation with my old Dad the other day,he has had grief councilling after losing my mother back in april and at last he has realised it is alright to cry in front of others especailly his daughter.I cannot describe the relief I feel now ,it is slowly coming out of him.He was brought up during the war and big boys did not cry then.Yoy would look like a pansy or nancy a derogatory term. My Dad was telling me if he fell out of a tree or something it really hurt but he had to bite back the tears and act like a man.Thank goodness this rubbish is now out dated.He is not crying everytime he comes over but he realise we won't think him weak if he does.
@xavier_sh (222)
• Nepal
3 Dec 08
we all are human being. all of us have emotions either he is man/woman. it isnot that a man should not cry or must control his/her emotion. it is good if u can control ur emotion and donot show it in mass but it varies from person to person. the limit of emotion cannot be determined.
@Monkeyrose (2840)
• Canada
3 Dec 08
Crying is natural. I think it is healthy for everyone to cry every once and a while. It helps vent emotions. The idea that men can't and shouldn't cry is an old fashioned idea that should be tossed out. Men aren't always the main supporters of the family now-a-days anyways.
@piya84 (2581)
• India
3 Dec 08
it depends upon a situation realy...if something heart breakening have happened ..crying in such a situation is perfectly normal...but if they star crying on small issues..then only its a sign of weakness...yes they are human being first they have full right to show emotions..
@carlingtop08 (209)
•
3 Dec 08
i dont think it really matters if a man crys or not. I mean if were sad is there anything wrong with expressing our feelings?. I do believe that a man shouldnt cry like a woman tho as it would be quite embarrasing to say the least.
@heyurock (85)
• United States
3 Dec 08
If you are asking this question, then you should also ask this:
1. Is it ok for a man to talk?
2. Is it ok for a man to express emotion?
3. Is it ok for a man to get angry?
4. Is it ok for a man to jump for joy?
I mean really, this question is kind of silly and anyone who believes that it is not ok for a man to cry is just ignorant. I don't care how you are brought up, never should any person feel as though they should harbour their emotions.
Maybe, if all people felt as though they could express themselves without being judged by anyone, we wouldn't have all the problems in the world that we have today, just a thought.
@forceflow (17)
• United States
3 Dec 08
show no emotion show no emotion at all except for the ones you can show it to the trusted one if you show an un-trusted one then they could tell there friends and make fun of you....
@j47lee (740)
• Canada
3 Dec 08
Crying is a good way to take out your frustration and talk about whateva is bothering u.. lightens ur heart... my boyfriends mom passed away and he cried his heart out to me in his room... i think he felt alot better after crying and telling me whateva he was feeling........
@jbrooks0127 (2324)
• United States
3 Dec 08
I come from an era where men did not cry openly. It was never done. As I recall it is not something you are told but something you learn by observance. Somehow crying is considered as a loss of control and it was always considered critical that the man not loose control.
Speaking from personal experience...even though I cannot cry openly in public...I cry within. I think this true of all men. There is not only nothing wrong with a man crying as it is a visible sign that the man is human and he cares. When a man hurts there is little difference between how he feels and what a woman feels. Just not as socially acceptable.
One of my experiences was when my mother passed away. I felt as I was crying for the whole time but was very surprised when my wife ask me how I could not cry...it was my mother.....how could I not cry? I truly had no idea it was not visible. My crying within served the same healing that crying without does.
It truly is all about the loss of control and men feel they cannot...they must not....do that.
Is that as it should be? No it is not. Not being able to show emotion carries over to many other areas and can be devastating to relationships if carried to far.
@Rainegurl (2156)
• Philippines
3 Dec 08
hi, ronnyb
grown men should cry whenever they feel pain. this may be caused by loss, failure or frustration. there is nothing wrong with crying and they must do so because of one simple reason: it is not good to keep pain bottled up inside.
have a nice day!