I don't believe This Shhhhhhhhh..........
By Tashasmith
@Tashasmith (172)
United States
December 3, 2008 8:50pm CST
My husband was looking for his sister and after being away from her since birth 29 years later her had meet with her 5yrs ago. Ok for the last 5 months I watched him call and call searching for her and he never found her. Now, with me being in law enforcement for 10yrs it was a simple task so finally after fighting with myself I volunteered to find her for him. And I did that a couple days ago I found her only after 2 phone calls. Now the night I found her she came over to visit. She hasn't left since then she ran this sstory about she was homeless. And my husband doesn't really Know her she looks like a homeless person like she said she was but the esame night....Only one hour after she meet with her brother she asked him for 100 dollars to take care of her business.She needed fto get her i.d and stuff???...Now she has been h ere for 1 night and asked me to pick her Boyfriend (WHAT) up and he doesn't live around the corner and then asked my hubby can he spend the night OF COURSE THE ANSWER WAS NO. And i didn't pick him up but he arrived anyway. Then asked me if I had any coffee.Of course I do but then she say's good because he (Boyfriend) wants some in the morning. I'm about to snap please give me a good way to deal with this soon.......MYLOTERS HELP
6 people like this
23 responses
@taripres (1499)
• United States
4 Dec 08
So, they snuck in on u, huh? Now that's a good one! Hmm, my only suggestion is to tell them, to get on with their business. But then again, I'm going through a similar situation with my younger brother, he eased his way in my house, and I haven't pushed him out yet cause he kinda doesn't have any place to go! So, I don't know! Now her boyfriend, he's got to ride out, her, she gets the time frame method; give her a set then it's time to go!
Taripre$
Taripre$2 people like this
@Tashasmith (172)
• United States
7 Dec 08
And I did just that only she had to get out with her boyfriend because she asked again could he spend a night. What NO babyg this ain't that and tat ain't this. These people are crazy I don't even know her and where is this dude from but he gonna stay in my home while we sleep I don't think so.
Taripre$
@mgmagana (3618)
• United States
4 Dec 08
omg, talk about getting taken advantage of. u guys really need to have a talk with her, if she is homeless then maybe u can arrange for her to stay until she gets on her feet, but let her know that she needs to look for a job and maybe u guys can help that way u know she's looking. good luck, that's a tough situation to be in cause i know u dont want to lose her again.
1 person likes this
@Tashasmith (172)
• United States
7 Dec 08
Yes but she was just annoying. She wonders all around the house and chain smokes. She had to go.
@shonali (1286)
• India
4 Dec 08
goodness gracious you have got serious problem there.... i think its better you sit and have a talk with your husband and make him realise whats going on here and how his sister after 29 years of seperation has come to his home and is trying to literally take over it.... i bet he would understnad but at the same time make sure you dont say something too bad about his sister too or it would probably hurt him or enrage him and then you wont have a ground to fight your case..... i dont think its a good idea for you to get involved with the sister...but definately you do have a say around the house as the house is yours and your husbands not his sisters and you have to make that very clear to your husband and indirectly to his sister too and i think you should put your foot down and tell your husband that though she is homeless she is an adult now and that if she can have a boyfriend she can get a job too.... and that she can look after herself very well and that he should stop baby sitting her now
@Tashasmith (172)
• United States
7 Dec 08
I agree totally that's why she got the boot how dare you try to take over my home.
@irishidid (8687)
• United States
4 Dec 08
I had a brother seek me out and find me. It took me a short time to realize that blood is not always thicker than water when the separation has been so long. I met the brother and a sister. They both had problems that I did not want in my life. I have other siblings with worse problems than they do, including one in prison for stabbing someone with a screwdriver.
While I had sympathy for what they went through, being tossed from foster home to foster home, I would not disrupt my family for them. I think finding a lost relative is not always a good thing.
1 person likes this
@Tashasmith (172)
• United States
7 Dec 08
I will have to say you are ABSOLUTLY CORRECT this was a crazy situation.
@sudalunts (5523)
• United States
4 Dec 08
If she says she is homeless, how were you able to find her by making a couple of phone calls? She had to be somewhere nearby in order to receive the call. I would let her know that you just wanted to reunite her with her brother and that she and her boyfriend can not stay with you. She sounds like someone who may be hard to get rid of. What is your husband saying about this. It is nice to reunite with lost family members, but please do not let her take advantage of you. Is your husband sure that she is his sister and not someone who is going to try to take advantage of an opportunity. My suggestion is to tell her to leave, but I am sure she will be showing up at your door many more times.
I wish you luck, funny how you were looking for someone, now you need to know how to get rid of her. Be careful of the two of them, since you do not know them.
1 person likes this
@Tashasmith (172)
• United States
7 Dec 08
Yes that is the truth well we finally got rid of her after she asked again can this man stay in our home. This is crazy I told her she was na arrogant bum and told her to leave now she calls all day and night lon from 8am-10pm his aunt said just to tell her to loose the phone number.
@PrincessKitten (790)
• United States
4 Dec 08
Tashasmith,
OMG, is this for real?!?...or did you see it on a talk-show?
If you didn't see it on a talk show, you probably need to contact one to let them know about this! I'm not being hateful, I'm being serious!
BTW - How did you find her so easily? Did you have to contact a homeless shelter to find her, or was it her home phone number? If she HAD a home phone number, that means she had a home that she should be going back to. If it was a work number, where was she sleeping?
Happy MyLotting! 
1 person likes this
@Tashasmith (172)
• United States
7 Dec 08
Yes a buddy of mine ran her name for me and she was located at a shelter but she had left there and went to another one. I called and told then my reason for calling and she was given the message and returned the call.
@lilaclady (28207)
• Australia
4 Dec 08
Oh dear you have got a problem, I think you can only explain it all to your husband, and then set a time that his sister has to leave and you could say nicely that you have other plans and it id just not possiblr for her to stay, it is a very difficult situation as your husband is probably going to think of his duty and pehaps deal with some guilt if he does what you say...its a hard one..
@angelface23 (2494)
• United States
4 Dec 08
wow that sucks. you were just trying to help your hubby out and now you have people overstaying their welcome and overstepping their boundaries. I don't know what I would do. I would probably want to help her get a job and a place but wouldnt want her staying in my house in the process. So that's a tough one. Where was she staying before?
1 person likes this
@bellis716 (4799)
• United States
5 Dec 08
Your story reminds me of ours. Our story isn't quite as bad as yours. It was my husband's daughter whom he had not seen since she was an infant. She had been abandoned by an abusive husband, so she was invited to come live with my husband, our 2 children, and me just until she could get a job and get on her feet. After two years and two jobs lost, she was still here. I was unhappy. The children were miserable, and my husband was getting impatient and short tempered. We finally gave her a one-way ticket back to her mother who lived in another state.
Perhaps, with your law enforcement connection, you could obtain more background on her that you could show your husband. It sounds as if she is a con artist.
@chabawel (329)
• Philippines
4 Dec 08
I truly feel sorry for you because it seems like the person your husband were looking for is already taking advantage of you and your husband.
I think it's better you set things straight with you husband about his sister's living condition and to what extent your husband will help her sister move on with her life.
It's not good when your marriage will be the one in jeopardy after this "family reunion" event.
Be strong and have faith that things will get better. Happy mylotting.
1 person likes this
@ladynetz (968)
• Canada
4 Dec 08
You did something wonderful by finding her.
However, now that your husband knows what she's doing and where is she living, is time to set a time for good by.
She is welcome to come visit you (set up boundaries for this too - let's say once a month), but not to take advantage of you.
You can explain it to her over a coffee (that's what she wanted, is it?), calm and nice.
It's your house and your rules.
Lots of good luck to you!
1 person likes this
@alyssa_c (440)
• Philippines
4 Dec 08
I find it amazing how people sometimes get to ignore others' feeling about their behavior. I think it's better if you talk your husband in getting rid of her, or at least make him see that his sister's behavior is inappropriate. And I'm wondering how she's homeless but has got herself a boyfriend who lives somewhere. I mean, why didn't she just live with him? Why did she have to bother you and all that? I understand that maybe she wanted to be closer to your husband as he is her brother but she is way out of line here.
1 person likes this
@scarletwitch12 (562)
• Philippines
4 Dec 08
I think someone is making suckers out you! Those people have no shame preying on the emotions of your husband and on your devotion to your husband and on your desire to do the right thing.
Talk to you husband, in the long run, it may well be better to kick them out of the house.
Good luck!
1 person likes this
@littlevv29 (20)
•
4 Dec 08
wow. like thats got to be weird having someone you dont know in your house. his sister or not he dont know her either and it seems like she isnt interesting in getting to know im she is interestin in using yall or something seems pretty fishy to me. i would have to be straight up with her and tell her to GET OUT! or work something out with her but no definitly wouldnt let her boyfriend come to your house or stay the night and i dont think i would let her stay there till i knew her a little more. so if your in law enforcement check her out find out if she has a bad record or anything. i would just watch her pretty close if she is staying with yall. good luck
1 person likes this
@dloveli (4366)
• United States
5 Dec 08
KICK THE B**CH out!!!! See thats why we need to be careful what we wish for. I am sorry for the woman's plight. However, It is not you or your husbands responsibility to take care of a sibling. The request for money would have been enough of a clue for me. I know how he must feel but come on she's not acting like she's interested in her brother as a person. SHe's interested in what he can give her. If she is homeless why hasnt her boyfriend helped her. Be careful she may be into something shady. THere must be a reason she's homeless. I wouldnt keep children alone with her. DOnt leave her in the house alone either. THis could become very dangerous. I dont want that to happen. Please get rid of her! FOr your own sake. GOOD LUCK and BE SAFE!!! dl
@dodo19 (47336)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
4 Dec 08
There's something truly weird about this woman. From what you've been saying and all, I'm really not buying her story. She says she's homeless. Then she talks about her boyfriend, who lives around the corner?? To me, that sounds suspicious. You should serious talk to your husband about this. And possibly check into this woman's identity. I wouldn't advice you to let either of them stay with you. Because it sounds like, if they stay, they might want to take advantage of you and your husband. This is just my feeling. I may be wrong, but I have a bad feeling about this.
@zhuuraan (961)
• United States
5 Dec 08
Kick them out. She was invited because he was looking for her, but her boyfriend is very much an unwwelcome visitor, and I'd say she has worn out her welcome. I understand if she is homeless, but if she just expects a handout and demands things like taht, she deserves to be homeless. I have no sympathy for homless people who ask for handouts and demand special treatment, like they are something special. Kick them out and tell her when she wants to show you guys some respect, you'll be happy to invite her over sometime for dinner or something, but not to stay the night for however long she pleases and not to invite her bf over uninvited. This is a situation where I think tough love is in order.them when they want to
@nutthouse3 (63)
• United States
5 Dec 08
I would first of all sit down and talk it over with my husband and just let him know that you aren't comfortable with "the so called boyfriend " staying overnight in your house.! Explain to him that she can stay for one more day. And that your not even sure she is who she says she is? I would be scared for mine and my husbands saftey. It almost sounds like a setup to me.
I think I would make up some type of story like you had a business trip planned and once she was gone , then make up something like it was postponed.
She seems a little quick to want to get settled into your home. Would make me very, very nervous!!!!
I wish you the best of luck!!!
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
5 Dec 08
Hi Tashasmith,
Simple, just kick them both out, they are taken a p*** and free loading in your house, if your husband won't do it, then you will have to, just throw them out and have nothing to do with them.
Tamara
@rareability (129)
• United States
5 Dec 08
say what you mean and mean what you say: Now that we found you, you will never be lost.I made previous plans for MY family, it's time to go. You don't know this woman nor how she was living. You did enough I applaud you. keep your head up ma!
let me know what happen?
