Should I Have Told The Truth About Santa Claus?

At the end of the day. It is your child and up to you what you do and say. She will probably respect you more for being honest with her. Like a previous post has said she most likely had doubts any way. Children are getting more worldly wise. My young cousin asked me the other day if Santa was real and as I am not her parent I said. Its up to you what you believe. She then said that her friends had told her it was not true and she didn't believe. I said fair enough and changed the subject very quickly. Its going to be hard what ever you said and on the spot is hard to make a decision. At least you had some morals behind your decision. So I would agree with your decision of telling her.

I dont think you did the wrong thing I just think you explained it wrong. Santa was on fact real. There was a man that was named santa because he would bring presents to the less fortunate and when my kids ask I will tell them that, Santa was a real man long time ago and we just celebrate him along with christmas because he would give presents on that night. BUT i dont agree with your hubby telling her different than you. He may make her think you are lying to her thats not a good thing for a young child.

I think the fact that she was asking means she already has probably been told by friends that he isn't real, I think your husband was wrong in what he did both to your little girl and to you, she has to know at some stage and if her friends are the ones that have given her doubts then she might look like a fool if she starts trying to correct them, i think there is probably a nice way to enlighten her plus when she is told the truth i think she should also be told that she should lets others believe until they are old enough to be enlightened...

That's up to you, isn't it? Would I have done the same, I don't know. Let me relate a little story for consideration. When I was growing up, 'santa' was not part of our holiday celebrations. My parents are very religious, in fact most of my family is this way. Do I agree with this? Not really. I never believed in santa because I didn't really get a chance or a CHOICE. I am resentful of this. My daughter is 4 and we do santa. She visits santa at Christmas, santa brings her one special gift she asks for (we give her the rest), and we usually do pictures. I don't know if she believes he's real or not but I want her to have that childlike innocence and believe right on up till when she doesn't. I don't want other people telling her he isn't real or doesn't exist, I don't want other adults crushing her imagination. I would be highly angered and annoyed at anybody who thought they were 'being nice' by telling the truth about something like this. I would have asked her (your daughter) what SHE thought before giving my two cents. If she still believed, I would let it go. If she said that she wasn't sure and then provided reasons for questioning, then I'd probably explain the whole idea around santa claus and how when you don't believe any more, then you don't, but it isn't okay to spoil the magic for people who DO still believe. I do not think this is on even ground with other things you always tell the truth to your kids about. This is one thing that is normally relegated to the very young, although some kids will continue to believe in santa until they are 10 or 11. Most realize at some point that the guy in the suit is daddy or they caught mommy stuffing stockings when they were supposed to be sleeping, or they caught one of their parents eating the cookies that were left for santa, stuff like that. In closing, do you think you did the wrong thing? If you feel fine about it and it didn't bother or hurt your daughter, then perhaps it was the right thing. For me it would have been the wrong thing and I'm not planning on ruining my daughter's fun until she tells me that she is too old for such nonsense. It appears to me that she was bothered, and it also appears that your husband wishes you hadn't done that, but of course that is between the three of you.

I believe that you should not lie to your children about santa clause, the tooth fairy, the easter bunny or anything like that. What kind of lesson is that teaching them? That lying is okay depending on who you're lying to? But the thing that really set the bells ringing for me in your discussion was that your husband called you a liar. What does that teach your child? Parents should not undermine each other with their children. They should be in agreement. I know it's none of my business but I was offended for you.

Her father was wrong in what he did. First of all, he flat out lied to her and that's irresponsible. Secondly, he undermined your answer and that's disrespectful. You did the good and right thing by being honest. If a child is old enough to question childish things, then they're old enough to receive honest answers.

At that age, she's probably going to be finding out soon anyway. It's best to be the one to tell her.

My 6 year old informed me the other day while shopping that she knows there is no santa, that I buy her presents and put them under the tree while she's alseep. I was kinda floored, I wasn't expecting this for at least another year, I didn't know until I was 9. I told her that santa is real if you believe in him, that he lives in people's hearts. I said that when she gives someone a gift, she's kinda like his helper. I know it sounds corny, but she liked it and I didn't feel so horrible about her learning the truth. I agreed that I buy her gifts for her, and that people do it for love. It's hard to answer if telling the truth is wrong or not, I don't see anything wrong, as long as it's them that asks, my friend told her son when he was 4 there was no santa, but he believed in him, she just didn't want to buy him any presents. That was a sad thing to see, so i guess if they ask they are old enough to know

No one told me Santa was not real. I was eight years old when I knew for sure but I suspected when I did not get the pony and the gifts were not that expensive. So probably your daughter already figured it out for herself and just wanted you to confirm it. It was not wrong to tell her that and your husband or your ex or boyfriend should have backed you up.

I think that the age when they come to you questioning the existence of Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, The Tooth Fairy, whoever...is the right time to tell them. They obviously have doubts or they would not have asked. My son asked me last year when he was 7. I lied to him and told him yes. This year I told him the truth. He took it pretty well. After I told him, I asked him if he was glad I told him or if he would have preferred I lied to him about it. He said he was glad that I told him.

No you shouldn't feel bad you handeled that situation exactly right, my parents told me santa wasn't real around 7 or 8 also...though I always caught the weird vibe my parents were lieing to me when I asked about him often I pretty much knew he wasn't real anyways it was just the matter of them "breaking the news". You answered your child honestly and that is the best thing to do I applaud you for that. I think her dad is wronge to keep stringing her along and confusing her about fact and fiction..I mean why keep giveing her false hope in something he knows shes going to find out anyways and be upset even more.

It is one of the most dificult questions to answer really. i dont know know if you answered it correctly or not.

I think it really depends on whether you believe she is ready to hear it or not. I think your hesitance might be something to do with your childhood and dealing with Santa Claus. The truth is always the best thing, so I think you should tell her at lease by the time she is 9 years old. Maybe you can buy her more presents the Christmas you tell her :P

Wait. Santa is not real? Way to ruin my childhood. Jerk!

Mommy, you did nothing wrong by being honest with your child. But....Santa Claus is real. Once upon a time, he might have been a real person but he would have passed away by now. His spirit of giving unselfishly has lived on. He taught us that each of us is capable of being a Santa Claus. His spirit lives in each of us. In that respect, he continues to live and therefore, is real. I hope this helps you to explain things to your child. Even at 7 years of age, your child will understand this idea.

Since you have told her already there is nothing wrong.But for me letting them believe about Santa Claus is something that we have inherited from our elders.If we were happy with the thought and the spirit of Christmas Santa Claus is bringing to us then we should keep the secret a little bit longer for them to enjoy too.

I think you did the right thing. When children start school they hear other children arguing about whether the is a Santa Claus. It takes some of them a year or two to question their parents about it and then you have to tell them the truth. My children asked when they were six and I told them the truth and my husband backed me up. The oldest kept up the pretence for the younger one until he came home and asked. She was very good.

She's seven, I think that is old enough to tell her the truth. Maybe you should discuss this with her dad first, so you can sort things out. I think that if she is already questioning the Existence of Santa Claus, she is ready to know the truth. A lot of children are never told that Santa Claus is real, and they grow up to be just fine. But in my opinion, it is better to tell her now, because the later she finds out, the more she will remember how she found out. I still leave Santa Claus milk and cookies, though.

When you start to lie about Santa being real you know that someday they will have to be told the truth. I am never sure why people lie about Santa, maybe because they were lied to as a child and for some reason think it is ok to pass it on to their own children. You punish your children for lying yet find the excuse to lie to your children when it would be just as easy to say Santa is the spirit of giving. 7 or 8 seems to be about the time that children start to find out their parents are not the all knowing people that they thought they were. They find out they have been lied to and their peers are the ones telling the truth. This is where the trust of the child is transferred from the parent to the peers, so that by they time they reach pre or early teens the peer group influence is more powerful than the parents influence. Santa is no more or less real than Snow White or Barbie, they are however fictional figures which we enjoy. So there really is a Santa Claus, just not a real person.

well,i know that when my mom told me santa clause wasn't real, my world fell apart. you see, we all like to beleive in fantasies.don't you still have the hope that some of your childhood fantasies could be real.how do you feel when you watch HARRY POTTER,or THE LORD OF THE RINGS, or perhaps THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA.being able to beleive in SANTA CLAUSE is not a bad thing for a child.it could also keep them sweeter some how.the thought of fantasies keeps our imaginations fresh and alive. let her beleive in him, it won't hurt anything