More Kids!!!???

I don't think you are being selfish at all. i would wait and make the decision after you have this baby. When I was pregnant with second one, I didn't want more and I felt like I was cheating my first one out of some mommy time. Then after I had the baby we had two girls and I decided that I wanted one more to try for a boy. While pregnant I felt bad again. I didn't want any more and I felt bad for having yet another baby to steal time from my first two lol. What can I say, hormones. Once your body gets back to normal then think about what you want. But if you decide that you don't want any more kids, i think that is perfectly fine. I don't think you are being selfish. I think it is completely understandable to want to have some time in your life when you aren't raising kids. I had my first at 21 and now have 3 at 27. I'm glad I got them all in and decided to stop. I had thought about more, but I decided I wanted to get more time for my husband. I think your husband would be ok with it if you discussed your reasons why you don't want any more.

No not at all, you know I have been a mum since I was 18 also, I was on my own with him until he was 8 years old. I remember how I would sit there and work out how old I be when he reached certain ages and how then I would still be young enough to have a life of my own again. Well, like I say I was on my own til he was 8 and then met my husband to be, and of course we ended up having more kids, three more in fact! Now my eldest is 17 and my youngest is 3, my own life has now been put on hold again for a while and it is hard some days, very hard in fact. I cannot have anymore and I am glad that I cannot because I would not have been able to cope with anymore plus I would never have had a glimmer of having any of my life back in the future and I adore my kids.

Wow, congrats on the pregnancy. I know how u feel, we started early at 17 and said we are not having any kids past 25 because since having kids took away our fun time as young adults, we wanted to have our adult yrs. to have fun after we're done raising kids. so i had my oldest at 17, then my second son at 21, then my daughter at 23 and we r done! my friend has been having kids since she was 15 and she is on her 5th at 27. i told her, she's gonna be raising kids for the rest of her life lol! but she has lost a lot of loved ones in her life, i tend to think she is replacing the hole in her heart with the losses of her family members by having more kids, cause when i say dang u have a lot of kids, she says well at least i won't be alone.

I would just talk to him and tell him about what your feelings are and that you love babies very much but it's time to stop having them. Then if I where you I would go get fixed so that no accidents happen.

My husband and I have one son. When I had my son I thought I would one day want more children and I knew that my husband did. Circumstances played out and I have changed my mind about having any more children my husband on the other hand would still like to have at least one more. I do not feel I am being selfish by not wanting more children. I dealt primarily with my son when he was small. I did almost if not all feedings, changings, baths, etc. I also was very depressed. I had always figured a baby would be at least 75/25 but I felt it was 95/5. I am not prepared to take on this role again and since it was me doing most of the work I feel I should have more say in the matter and besides that it is me going to gain weight, feel miserable, and have all those doctor exams. In my case, maybe I am selfish but I don't feel as I am, an infant is something I am prepared to take on again. Consider who does most of the work with the kids. Do you give up your everything while he maintains his normal existance? Do you always have to feed, change, bath etc? If you do all the work then no I don't feel you are being selfish. If however he does not care to help it might be worth a long discussion to see why each of you feel the way you do about children. You never know he might even hear what you have to say and see where you are coming from. It is worth a chance to not later have any resentment hanging around.

If you're done, you're done.... Hopefully he will understand. There's no use bringing more children into this world if your heart isn't in it. Explain that to him and see about joining a bowling league or something else that you and your hubby can do together on a regular (and mandatory/scheduled) basis... If he still insists on having more after you've tried filling up his schedule with other things, then maybe you can revisit it. Also keep in mind that since men OR women can't reproduce on their own, it truly is BOTH of you that need to make the final call.... so try to be sensitive to his needs too and compromise if you have to.

I understand how you feel. My kids are babies and its nice just to get a little break from them every now and then. My youngest will be 2 soon and to think of feeding and changing and waking up every 2 hours doesn't sound good to me at all. Its just nice that they are finally doing little things on their own. Don't get me wrong I do love my kids but it would be nice to use the bathroom without an audience. Or take a shower without someone banging on the door. Or even watch a whole movie without having to pause it a million times b/c the kids need something. I probably will miss them being tiny and so dependent on me but I like the little bit of freedom they are giving me by learning to do things on their own.

I know where both are you'll are coming from. That is the main problem adults disagree in. A lot want more kids while others want the least amount. I use to be the one wanting as much as i could get. My fiance was the brakes. He only wanted one or two. NOw its the other way around. I am sorry you are struggling with it. Perhaps get on birth control and put your foot down. Tell him how you feel.

Nope you are not being selfish at all. You and your husband do have children together, so it isn't like you are denying him anything. All you are asking is that you can look forward to having the opportunity to have your life back before you are too old to enjoy it.

I love to have more kids...after my marrage.kids are really wonderful and beauty to have that too more kids make family too joy and happy..there play, angry, fighting etc..each and every action of them makes us feel great...so having more then 2 kids is good up to me....:)

Well I agree with you, kids are lovely but they are exausting and you have to face pregnancies. I have only one child for now, however I will think having onother one in the future, but it depends my health and money too. Kids are fun but life isn't only growing kids, Life has lots of things to give. I would like to travel, and enjoy life before having another baby. Well I think you should talk to your husband and tell him how you really feel, I think you have just enough kids :)

My husband also want more kids... but for now, i can't give him because of his chickboy attitude. i have only 1 kid and its a boy. now, my son is attending school as toddler. i don't want to give a kid for my husband because of that and also we still have no house to live with. actually, we have no permanent address because my son and i are leaving with my parents. sometimes, we are leaving with my in-laws. the situation is really problematic. but i want to give my son and little brother or sister because that's what he wants. Don't you worry son because someday, if God's will, I will give you a baby brother or sister.

more chirden ,more trouble ,it' not good idea to have so many kids

yah kids are lovable ones. i like those very much. iam unmarried now,, but soon i get married and will have a couple of kids. in the world they are the most lovable ones.

Congratulations !!! But no, I dont think that you are being selfish at all....I have 3 kids myself and have no life...lol..I mean I never get 2 seconds to myself, they are a full on job and as you get older you want to relax, I understand what you are going through.

I think in this time especially that there is crisis it is not good to have more kids. I really don't know your financial status. More kids more expenses. But even if financially you are okay you still need to be emotionally be there for them. Having more kids is difficult. This is just my opinion, but it is up to you both to talk if you are still willing to have more. Tell him about your view, I think he will be willing to listen.

I know how you feel. I have 2 kids with my husband and he wants a 3rd! The 2 that we have keep us busy enough, and with our oldest being autistic it can be quite crazy at times! I've told him several times that I do not want anymore kids. I've even explained why. But still, he wants another. We have 2 sons together and he wants us to have a daughter. I told him time and time again that I cannot guarantee a daughter, and he is fine with that. I'm kind of worried though, that if we were to have another and it was a boy, he'd want to try again until we got a girl. Thanks, but no thanks. I'm not interested in being a baby making machine. I know some love having a big family, and that is fine for them, but I'm just too worn out to do it.

you are not being selfish at all. I have 4 kids and raised them on my own...2 marriages and pretty much the same situation as you are in. My youngest will turn 18 when I turn 56. When they were all younger, he had 2 from a previous marriage that lived with us so we were literally the brady bunch. Loved them all but it was insane. Then my oldest got married and pregnant so I had a grandchild that I babysat for as well as 5 kids at home. In many ways the older kids did help with the younger ones so in that aspect it was good. Still, they were teens and would only do so much before they started feeling resentful and who could blame them. It was not their problem that we had so many kids....they should be able to be teens & have their lives. it is one thing to expect them to help out as families do and quite another to rely on them to the point that they are being denied a normal teen experience. Some kids are into sports and other activities. Teen years are when they learn about dating etc. They should not be obligated to give up those things for our choices. You started this discussion at a great time because as we speak...I have not had a free moment to myself before 10 pm for days and 3 of my 4 kids are grown!! Between sports for the 14 yr old and storms have caused school closings which means I am babysitting my 2 grandchildren everyday plus the 22 year old just moved back in after breaking up with her boyfriend. So what I'm saying is think long and hard before adding to your family. I have no regrets and I love them all so much but it doesn't end when they turn 18 . You will have your hands full with what you have already....I would not suggest adding to it.