Do you have a friend that calls you just to brag what he or she has?
By Im4real79
@Im4real79 (58)
United States
December 17, 2008 9:57am CST
I have a friend who is starting to get annoying. When she does call, which isn't too often. She stays on the phone the whole time talking about money and what she paid for everything. I am lucky to get a word in edgewise. For instance, she proceeded to tell me that she spent over $1200 on Christmas gifts for her 5 and 6 year old kids. Which included 2 Nintendo wii's, 2 Nintendo Ds's and $400 on clothes. Then she stated how much money her parents gave her for Xmas and how much her boyfriend makes and how much she will be getting on her income tax next year. I couldn't care less about all this. I don't understand why she tells me these things. Does she do this to make herself feel better and make me feel bad? Does she expect me to be jealous of her? She knows I am a lower income individual and can't afford stuff like that. So it seems she throws it in my face to get a reaction from me. All I say is "thats nice". I am getting tired of hearing her talk about it. I am not jealous of her because she didn't even work for most of the monies that she gets. Either her parents or boyfriend give her all this money. That the case, she should help people who are homeless, disabled and hungry who have real problems instead of filling her house with materialistic crap that means nothing.
1 person likes this
17 responses
@modstar (9605)
• Philippines
18 Dec 08
I got worst! My friend didn't call but he went to our house with his new girlfriend. I thought he'll go to out house to borrow my USB dongle and it ended up me as their audience because they just go to our house to talk with eachother and all i did was watch. I know for sure that he just wants to brag to me his new girlfriend who's not really that beautiful for me personally. I don't know why, maybe he's the latebloomer in the group and she's his first legal girlfriend. I can understand it but what i can't take is that why do they have to go to our place. Like you said, i couldn't care less.
your right mod, she's probably his first girlfriend. @conbill (369)
• United States
17 Dec 08
I think that most people who do these kinds of things are really very unhappy. She probably doesn't even realize how she makes you feel. By talking to you and telling you how much money she gets she is trying to convince herself how great her life is when really it probably isn't. I had a friend who used to do this and then all of us found ot that while she might wear expensive clothes and have the best of everything she was so far in debt that she'll probably never see daylight.
@Im4real79 (58)
• United States
18 Dec 08
That may be the case. She does tell me she is happy, but I don't think she is. She has alot of health problems, including diabetes and cardiovasular issues and she is only 29 years old. Money can buy alot of things, but it can't buy health.
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
18 Dec 08
So why don't you confront this friend in a friendly way and make her see how she is behaving? I once had a friend like that years ago. One time I was fed up with it, so I chuckled and said: why do you call to tell me what you bought and paid for this stuff when I don't really care? STill chuckling I told her to keep it to herself and call me again when she had real news. I weed out friends like this, because they aren't worth the hassle half the time.
@Im4real79 (58)
• United States
18 Dec 08
I have tried talking her before, not about this, but about how she treats me. She gave me a guilt trip and made it seem like she didn't know what I was talking about. She tends to turn stuff around on people to make her the victim in everything. I have always been a friend to her, but she can never be one to me. My own family tells me to not answer when she calls, maybe I'll do just that.She is only a friend when it is on her terms. Fairweather friend is what they call it.
@kaliyha (591)
• Philippines
18 Dec 08
I do know a few people who acts like your friend. The reason they do this is actually not about you and me but about them. They tell us about how much money they have and how much they spent because they don't feel good about themselves. They have a hole which they think they can fill by bragging about money.
@Damsel89 (43)
• United States
18 Dec 08
Can I ask you, do you think you encourage her?
I had a friend only contact me to brag. It made it even worse that, as he told me of his accomplishments, he would make a saddened expression. So, he was throwing these great things in my face, and also sending bad energy (I could never understand why). I always say nice things and congratulate him. It has been annoying, but I can never bring myself to tell him how I feel. He still does this. :( The things he accomplishes are things I am on the path to achieve, so it did make me jealous. In the beginning, it was inspiring. I am trying to get back to perceiving this behavior as that.
@Im4real79 (58)
• United States
18 Dec 08
No. I don't encourage her. All I say is "that's nice". I am really not impressed with what she is saying. She is a very selfish and self absorbed person. She comes from a well off family and feels the need to tell me every detail about her new spendings.I haven't seen her in 9 months and we don't spend much time together. Just periodically phones me when she is bored.
@RetardedWilly (25)
• Romania
18 Dec 08
I had a friend like that once, I stoped considering him a friend and did everything possible to make his life miserabile when when I realised he was not a true friend but just a leech.
The kind of guy who brags about everything he does, always wants you to help with something but never offering anything in return.
You don't need "friends" like that.
@Im4real79 (58)
• United States
18 Dec 08
You are right about that. She expects me to be her friend, but is not one in return. She takes and takes and takes and never gives. She would rather concentrate her time on people who can take her out to fancy dinners and buy her gifts. I don't need her, she needs me.
@rogue13xmen13 (14403)
• United States
18 Dec 08
No, I have cousins and a boyfriend who do that for me.
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
18 Dec 08
[i]I have no friends like that and I am thankful..LOL! I know how annoying is that...I met an acquaintance last summer who was like that but I decided not to continue hanging out with her, it's not healthy for me...LOL!
I really hope this friend of yours will find something to do to keep herself busy! LOL![/i]
@zukichucha (991)
• United States
17 Dec 08
That is disgusting! All I can say is that you are better friend than me. I would've told her a long time ago how it makes me feel. It's not what you say it's how you say it. If I were you I'd politely tell her that although I am happy she is doing so well that it makes me feel bad. It can be that she does this with everyone and doesn't realize how she comes off?
@Im4real79 (58)
• United States
18 Dec 08
Yes. I agree. It is disgusting. I doubt she does this to anyone else, though, because all her friends have money. Unfortunately, I am the poorest in the group. Money is everything to her, but for me it isn't because I have never had any. I have caller id, so when she calls maybe I shouldn't answer. She isn't much of a friend and she seems to only call when she is bored or have nothing else better to do.
@katemeow (847)
• Singapore
18 Dec 08
i think everybody has people like these in their lives - people who like to brag and make themselves feel good by making others feel insecure or envious. I used to have a friend who would do this to me all the time, but i have stopped talking to her because when you think about it, what kind of friend would want you to feel bad? Friends should be sensitive and be understanding enough not to dangle out topics that will offend and hurt you :(
you're very right in saying that she should just help those who are in need. I mean, why would her kids need 2 of each toy? what ever happened to sharing?
@bodhisatya (2384)
• India
18 Dec 08
Hi, You are not alone my friend. The main reason of people's bragging is maybe they are suffreing from complex and would love to indulge themselves in a tongue lash if you utter one single non-sense. The best way out probably is to ignore such pests...
@surveytaker29345 (489)
• United States
17 Dec 08
I don't have a friend like this because in all honesty she is not a real friend. I suppose that she may just be venting to you. Maybe she is someone who just likes to talk and will detail every situation of their day to you. She may also want you to be jealous. I don't know why another person would want to make you jealous because there are not benefits from doing so.
If she has such an excess amount of money, I agree that she might want to consider giving some to those who are less fortunate. I especially think she might want to purchase some gifts for children who will not otherwise receive them. Christmas is after all the time for giving and not receiving.
I must commend you for being so strong through the conversations because I don't think I could have done the same if I were in your situation. I wish you the best of luck on your continuing relationship.
@Im4real79 (58)
• United States
18 Dec 08
You are absolutely right. She isn't a friend. We hardly spend any time together because she makes alot of excuses. Just recently I asked her to come over and see me. I have been asking to see her for the last 9 months. It is always the same excuse "I am busy" or "When the weather is nice". It hasn't even started snowing fully yet in my area. She will drive 2 hours to NY to see her boyfriend, but she won't drive 30 minutes to see me. I don't have a car and I can't go up to see her until I have one. What hurts the most is we have been friends since we were kids and she treats me like I am a inconvenience to her. The friendship is very one sided. I guess I will just have to slowly end this so called friendship
@vanonas (949)
• United States
17 Dec 08
I don't have friends like that. But I have talked to people like that and when I do I just make things up that are better than what they're saying. Or if I do have better things I just tell them hoping it annoys them and they'll leave me alone. . I don't become friends with people like that.
@saiKO92 (392)
• Malaysia
17 Dec 08
I think she is trying to hide something or just wanna brag to you. Whatever the reason, we as human are will need to talk to somebody to make ourselves feel better. I guess maybe she trusted you that's why she done that.
I have a friend like yours. Well, at the beginning of our friendship, he always brag about himself but I just pretend like I hear it. But lately, he told me the truth and begin to tell me his problems and ask for some advices. So I guess, your friend brag to you because she wants to know whether you can be trust with her problems and secrets.
@anonymousxo (6)
• United States
18 Dec 08
Oh my goodness yes! YES! I have a friend who hardly talks about anything but grades (a relatively similar subject) Everytime he walks up to me it's "What'd you get on this test," "whats your average?" all those other silly things, and whenever he gets even 1 point higher he does this silly laugh... grr, but we're cool, he helps me stay competetive so I can keep my grades up so I don't have to hear him, hehe.
