Daughter verbally abusive.

Personally i would ignore it. I know it would be hard especially with your grandchildren involved. My sister is like this. She is only seventeen. She talks anyone and everyone down. She doesn't care one bit. I spent alot of money on her for her baby she is about to have. My mom doesn't want nothing more to do with her just as well as anyone else. She told my mom and my dad she hated them. We all have tried to help her. In the end just trying to stay out of the way is the best. I can only hope things get better for you. I know it is only beginning for me.

This sounds like a very traumatic situation to be in wanderer. Although I realize that in practicality, things are not always easy, but I will put in my two cents in theory anyway..... The most important challenge in all of this is to try to determine the root of the problem. Why is she acting this way towards you? What spark's it off? Where did it originate from? Is her issue REALLY you or something else that she won;t disclose and you are bearing the brunt of? There HAS to be an explanation concerning why she is acting this way towards you and until you know what the reasoning is, you have no chance whatsover to try and fix things. Is there any way you can convince your Daughter to go with you to see someone neutral so you can thrash things out once and for all? (Assuming you haven't attempted this angle already) It's a catch 22 with the Grandkids too unfortunately. Them witnessing this type of behaviour towards you is not good at all. If your Daughter refuses to work with you towards seeking a resolution together, then you may have to set ground rules and ignore her if she doesn't abide by them. If she rings and gets abusive, tell her that you love her, but will not tolerate this type of behaviour. Then hang up the phone after telling her to please call back when she is feeling better or something. The Grandkid's are the end game here so you need to ensure you do not retaliate in any way because this will be used against you. I hope she will agree to see someone with you because getting to the source of the problem will allow you both to move on from it. There may be other influences in her life that she is unable to communicate too; and she is using you as the scapegoat rather than coming clean about it. Either way, seeking joint counselling or something may just get things out in the open and pave the way towards a fresh new beginning for you both that is free of any baggage.

well if you live in the states, there is grandparents rights, look into that first. and the court will make her to let you see the grand babies. if you got the law there, then you nail her back side to the wall and tell her no more. i could never see doing that to my parents, my brother does that with my dad all his life. now my dad is like no more cutting him off. but maybe if she goes through mood swings there might be a mental issue as well. talk with her husband and see if she been having mood swings.

Verbal abuse is not laughing matter especially when you are on the other end of it. At 37 years old somebody should be a mature adult by now. I know that you don't want to lose contact with your daughter but you might have to isolate yourself from her for a little while. You could always just keep trying to talk with her and let her know that her words are quite hurtful. Someone can lose friends acting like she's acting. Good luck to you.