They forgot his present!?!

I am really ticked off at your in-laws for you son. Poor guy. He might not be saying anything (because your raising him right) but I bet he is silently asking himself what he did. Why his grandparents don't like him. Not that you asked for what I would do, but this is what I would do. I would confront them and tell them if they can't treat all of your children equally then don't buy any of them anything. It's not fair to put that child through that. It has to be messing with his self esteem!!

My husbands parents have always disappointed our children and that is why we don't even invite them to anything. When we knew it was affecting the children we just put a stop to it. It wasn't right and we weren't going to have our children feel like they were less or have one feel they were less for anyone not even grandparents.

aww thats sad. Is he not their blood relative that they treat him this way? I don't have any family members that treat my kids different. I am happy with the way my family pays attention to both of them equally and they get equal things as far as gifts and such. my mom will make sure of this. If she has 1 present more then for the other she will go out and get something even if its Christmas Eve and I tell her with all the stuff I'm sure they won't notice but it doesn't matter to her. Your a great parent and you have yourself a good son for him handling it the way he does. Keep up the good work mom.

That kind of thing happened to my kids a few years ago by my grandmother, she would buy brand new designer things for her "favorites" and then the rest would get dollar store stuff, I love the dollar store and some of them have wonderful things, but this was a few years ago when the dollar store just opened an they had kinda funky stuff. Anyway I know it's not about the presents but she purposely would make sure everyone knew how much she spent on her favorites which made my kids an others feel bad and it just wasn't any fun. When I saw the hurt in my kids' faces I swore I would never take them to another family party like that, and I haven't it has made my Christmas' much better and my kids' as well. We only go to my mom's or just stay home and have our own little Christmas which means much more to me than seeing family members who don't like me or my kids. i know it's hard to do something different when it comes to tradition, but when I stopped going to the huge family Christmas party I felt a whole lot of relief I never knew how stressed out I was until I stopped going. You have raised a very well mannered son and I know it hurts him to see that he is not the favorite and it hurts you as well to see your son disappointed if it was me I would give him the option of not going next year, maybe that will help the grandparents see they are hurting him plus it wouldn't give them the satisfaction of seeing him hurt.

Your son is a handsome little man. I just don't understand why they would treat him this way. Once is understandable as mistakes get made, but to do it over and over again tells me there's something going on and what they are doing is deliberate. I'd tell them they get even or don't bother.

kats, do they do this simply because he is not your husband's son? I find this deplorable! There is no excuse for adults acting this way toward a youngster! My daughter is no longer married to her last two son's father, but his mother/step father treat her first two kids (that he raised) just like their own grandkids - never misses a birthday to send them a card and money or Christmas. They have never showed partiality over those kids and neither has her Ex husband. They call him Daddy and he tells everyone he has 4 children, even to this day. AND your in-laws should do the same! The child didn't ask to be in the situation where he is and I'm sure he considers them grandparents and they should treat him as a grandchild! But it looks like they show partiality even with your kids, giving the twins more than they do the others. That is simply not right! I believe I'd say something to them very nicely, letting them know it's not appropriate!

Wow that is terrible. No wonder you don't like your in laws. I think it is great that he handles it well. If I were you though I think I would probably have a fit about it. My in laws haven't really disappointed my kids yet because they are too young to notice. But soon they are going to realize that grandma and pap would rather go to their precious camper shows then come to their birthday parties. There are two camper shows a year, one in march and one is september. my oldest was born in september and my middle one in march. So they have only been to 2 of the 6 birthday parties i've had for our oldest. And that is only because i used to change the date so that they could come. now i figure if it isn't important enough to miss the camper show i wasn't going out of my way for just them. I think my daughter is starting to notice.

This kind of just happened to us. My oldest son has never gotten anything for Christmas from my in-laws! This Christmas was the worst - they bought my 2 year old a bunch of stuff and my 15 year old was left sitting there wondering where his gifts were!! He finally just curled up in a chair and fell asleep. It is so sad. I have no reason why they have always done this. It is weird. My brother in law has 3 daughters and one of them always gets gifts and the other 2 never have.

I don't. I did have a grandmother who used to do this to my brother when we were younger. She favored me because I was the only girl and she favored my little brother because he was the baby. For whatever reason, she very obviously did far less for my other brother. I remember being showered with gifts and looking over to see one or two not very exciting gifts that he got at xmas. Like your son, he handled it well. I did not. I grew to not respect her too much. My father threatened her with us not coming to her home on christmas anymore if she could not be more fair. After that she improved somewhat on Christmas but at other times her favoritism was so obvious. She used to take me shopping and tell me I could pick out anything that I wanted. I would of course pick out things for my brother as she never would take him shopping. She tried to stop me and I put all my things back and said I didn't want anything. I never understood such discrimination. We were all just little kids.

That's terrible! bless his little heart! My in-laws always give too much when it comes to gifts... If one of my children has a birthday, she (my mother in law) buys something for all three of my children (even now that they are teens!)... the biggest gift going to the birthday child, of course.. but no one ever felt left out. I can't even imagine what your in-laws are thinking.. and what they are doing to that child.. it would be different if they couldn't afford gifts at all.. but to go out and spend more on everyone else and leaving the other child out is so wrong! Next year, I hope that you take your in-laws aside ( in private) and tell them that if they can't give gifts evenly, not to even bother.. because you will not let your children accept ANY if that be the case.

That is really sad, I think that is really horrible. Luckily with four children none of our family single any out for favouritism which is great because I could not stand it if they did. I like to treat all my kids the same and I expect everyone else to do so too and even if they do have a favourite I never expect them to show or say anything. All my kids get exactly the same amounts spent on them and that is how it should be.

Hi Kat I don't have any sons yet but I know what you're talking about,happened to me a few times. See,we have this tradition-if you're going to a relative's or close friend's home and you know they have young children,you've got to bring them something. Nothing big or fancy,an apple or lollipop would do.Ideally,that concerns everybody,even strangers,let alone someone close. However,I have an aunt from my dad's side that only gave a couple of gifts in her life and trust me,she has a great deal of nephews and nieces! lol I'm not saying you have to go broke for your relatives but the problem is that she's also the richest out of the entire family.You can start new business every week but you can't afford buying kids some candy?..

Oh that is sad, and it breaks my heart! That sounds like something that my inlaws would do though, so I can feel your frustration. I guess its good to teach our kids that its not about the presents, its the thought that counts, but its hard when you see the disappointment on their faces....When I had my son, my uncle was mad at me for making his parents (my grandparents) great-grandparents before their time....So he took it out on my innocent newborn. He wouldn't come over, he made rude comments to other family members, etc....It sad that FAMILY treats others like that, especially CHILDREN!!! Shihtzuamama

Your eldest son sounds like a fine young person who will grow up to be a wonderful man. he is a very gracious. Having said that - I would be so cross that any discrimination was going on with regard to gifts in my family. I honestly feel that you husband should speak to them. It should be fair - even if it means giving everyone one gift. I am hurting for your son so I know that you must be hurting too. Blessings

I have never kept track on giving more or less. Sometimes one child has something that is more expensive. But, with my kids, I never had a problem. There was no comparison. They never had a problem with it either. I guess if you feel your son has not gotten enough ,then you could buy him something extra. Without saying why of course. This way you will feel better too. Take care.

oh so soory for ur oldest son ur in laws are really know how to irritate him ur laws notice that they have to not irritate him always