My parents are bigots...

Isn't it sad that your parents are going to lose the love and respect of their favourite grandchild? Just because a person is of a different race? They will only see her ocassionally - a fact that you could point out to your parents. Many years ago, I married a person of a different race who also was on the same level educationally as I was. My parents loved him and the race part did not matter. I came to his country and stayed and raised 4 children on a farm. we were very happy. Sure there were ups and downs like there are in any marriage but race ddi not play a part in our lives at all. Talk to your parents. Your daughter has known him long enough to marry him. Talk to them and point out that they should be suporting your daughter in her choice. May God Bless both of them and may they be happy together. Blessings

What would I say? I am very outspoken about this. First of all, I believe that it is NEVER anybody else's business than the couple in love if and when they choose to be together or get married. This doesn't involve other people at all, least of all parents or grandparents. I AM a parent so keep in mind I can look at this from two perspectives. As far as MYSELF, I know with certainty that I will and do choose what I want and I don't care who else approves or not. I mean I always would PREFER that they at least accept but if they don't, it doesn't alter my decision and if they are jerks about it, then I just cut them out of my life. In the matter of your parents - your daughter's grandparents? I'd tell them I disagree with them, my daughter disagrees with them, it's HER choice, and they don't have to like anything but they do have to accept it or they will stay away to avoid hurting her. As far as kids - my kids have the right to choose whom they date and life partners without interference from me. Other than wanting to make sure they are good people and would never hurt my daughters or my son and have reasonable goals of providing and sharing responsibility, if they make each other happy, I don't really have any complaint. I don't care what race, the issue where people have hangups is usually culture anyway, not race. Racial difference means nothing, but a cultural way of life that is very different might. Now I might caution about a different religion - but ONLY if that meant myself or my child might get oppressed as a result of it. If the difference in religion was nil because they were non practicing or it would not end up altering anybody's views or life, then I don't think it matters at all. Many people can coexist quite peacefully with different beliefs and not put upon each other. So anyway, yes, the title of your discussion sums this up nicely. Maybe tell them this and don't be nice. Just because they are your parents doesn't give them the right to be hurtful jerks because of their own inability to accept something. Ask them how this affects THEM in any way. It doesn't. It's not their relationship.

well, i think it is again depend on your daughter and her partner... they are the one who undergo the relationship and i don't think that your parents can interfere too much about it... it is their lives and let them go through it as long as they are happy... as long as you also bless their relationship, that is what matter more... take care and have a nice day...

I think this is a problem peculiar to the United States. I assume that the man is an African American. Now in Canada, he would be considered Canadian, maybe of West Indian, Jamaican, or whatever background, but if they married and had children, the children would be considered Canadian, but in the States, things are different. Because of black slavery, in the past any with just one thousands of Negro in him was considered as if he were pure black. So they are afraid that their heritage will be dismissed. So if you come from an Irish background or an Anglo-Saxon background, their future great grandchildren will only be known by their African-American heritage alone. So it is fear. It would not be the problem if the man was Chinese (but then they would think about the Chinese Communist) and if he were Japanese, they would think about World War II. So you see, until people are remembered for both sides, you will have this bigotry in families. So you have to understand that it takes a lot of time for your parents to accept the young man.

Tell them he is not black - he is not white but ust like them he is HUMAN and that your daughter loves him and he loves her and is good to her and for her and if they can't accept that tell them you feel sorry for them and their racial bigotry.

What a dreadful situation,your parents must stay away as this could get very nasty.What on earths going to happen when the little ones come along,what on earth will they say when a mixed race baby pops out.You really must have a word with them and tell them straight to stop this silly nonsence and accept this man he makes their grandaughter happy,he is kind ,generous,and he loves her to bits and will look after her,so just stop being so racist and change like the world has,your poor daughter has she picked up on this or her boyfriend.They will end up being very lonely if they don't respect her choices and accept him as part of the family.Talk about stuck in the middle,you stand a good chance of losing someone if you don't take care.Maybe they will come round after a while,lets hope they do,they will have to cope with the religion issue as well,but lets not forget it is their problem nobody elses and they will have to get over it or stay away,at the wedding he will want his relatives there and whats going to happen if they think their beloved son is moving in with a lot of racists,it could ruin their lives and that of your daughter.So they will have to pretend they are ill on the weddding day and simply not come.I am afraid to say you are right they are bigots sorry,that is thier choice and not yours remind them of that,sorry.

This is a hard situation and can really hurt the people involved. It is probably best for you to talk to your parents and tell them how you feel and think and how their attitude could hurt their relationship with their grand daughter. You should also talk to your daughter and tell her how your parents feel and that you support her fully no matter what. While it could hurt her, she has your support and the support of her new fiance. Unfortunately there are a lot of people who have problems with race (and religion). It will probably come up again, but race is only skin deep and it sounds like your daughter has found a very good man.