Could You Say, "NO"?

I would help certain members out and that would be the extent of it. I have already decided who would benefit should I ever be in the position to do so. I would keep it quiet though I mean the only way I am going to ever come into a lot of money is by winning the lottery so I would keep it quiet and not tell anyone!

I too have thought about this. I certainly would help immediate family members. However I would not give out the capital, instead I would set up a family trust and each individual would get a monthly stipend enough to live on comfortably. This accomplishes two things, the ones who live properly will have enough to live comfortably and the spend thrifts will only have monthly amounts to piddle away. The spend thrifts if you gave them a million dollars all at once, they would spend it all and be back for more, so this is the second advantage of a family trust is that it is tied up and out of your hands so they cannot come begging to you. Some people you give a couple of million to and they can live on it for the rest of their lives, others have money burn a hole in their pocket. I believe there would be tax advantages to a family truast too.

Hi Lynnemg, for this question, I will say "no" if they no use the money in the corect way. Here I had a small story about my brother, my brother would like to get some money from my father, and my mother say "no" to my brother, because just don't want his son use it on senseless things, but at last my father agree to get some money to his son.

I would never ever say "NO" to my mom's side of the family. I've been very close to my relatives. In fact, my granny and her children took care of me when my mom's still working as a high school teacher. Though my dad's been earning enough to support the family, my relatives didn't stop providing our needs. They've been there to give love, care, support and guidance. And in return, i'd like to give back all the love they've shared with us.

Presently I have a limited amount of money and I have a difficulty with saying no to both family and friends ,so I know that if I won a lot of money I would have even greater difficulty saying no to my family members. I would give them a certain amount of money though if I won and I would get out of town because I know if they squandered their money I would still have difficulty saying no.Maybe I should give then a limited amount of money adnd save back some so that I could give them some more if they squandered it . Great discussion

if it where me i would put a limit to how much they get i would give them a little at a time and when they use up what they got i wouldn't give them anymore unless it is for a good cause and if (like you said) they used it in an intelligent way:)

if i have lots of money, i will definitely help my family members especially my parents... no questions asked... i love my family so much and it will be very hard for me to say no if i have money to help them... i mean, why not??? the money is a blessing from God and it doesn't belong to me... so if i can share it with other people, i will feel happier as well... take care and have a nice day...

i would help my family if i came into a lot of money i would do what i could for them.now if they keep coming back then i would have to put a stop to this i can,t give them all i have i to have to live off this money i love you but i will have to say no.

Hi lynnemg, If I came into a lot of money, I will only help my family who has helped me in the pass and who are very close to me, I won't bother with families that you don't see from one year to the nexr and don't even get a christmas cards from them. Tamara

I have NEVER experienced anyone in my family asking for money from me. I don't believe that they ask others either. It is just not done in our family. If someone is in need , it may become apparent and then someone will step up to help, but generally, we try to handle our own financial business ourselves. As far as giving money to family members if I had a lot of money, I would maybe give it anonymously as a gift but since we are not in the habit of borrowing from each other, I'm not sure what I would do if someone came to me for it. I DO know however that a gift should have no strings attached. You should never tell someone how to use a gift. If they were not very smart with the money given to them, then that is their business. But I don't think I would bail them out again!

hi! this is a great topic to discuss. if i have enough money i will allocate something to give to my relatives who are in need. i am also thinking of giving them something to work on a job maybe or a business to start with. there is an adage that says teach men to fish so that he will not ask for fish. as a person it is right to say No when needed not at all times were saying YES to everyone. its hard because we cannot please everybody. sometimes saying No may hurt them but if this will help them realize their value as a person then its good.

Oh yes of course after providing the immediate family for their needs plus little investments and savings, the other member of the family is next and even to the extended members of the family or distant relatives should they needed help. Even friends would benefit just in cae. There would be limitation of course and I can only say no if I would feel they're taking advantage of you. I can give them again maybe If they really need it but after they must know how to earn, I can give them capital to start a little business.

Yes, If I have a spare money I would share it to my family who needed help.. but if ever the money i gve they just watse it and keep on asking again, of course I could say to them "NO" again.. I dont want to let them abuse me in asking money when they dont know how to use it in their necessity..Its very haRD to extend help when you know it will just on waste.

if my fam member disturb me n my life i will say no cause i dont want to have noise in my home

How much I would help would depend on a lot of things. I hate to put a lot of 'strings' on anything. I have always told family that as long as we have it there is always a place to sleep and food to eat at our house. That doesn't mean I will let them drive my car, buy them cig or booze, or let them run my house. But I will always feed them. I am not a practicer of 'tough love', not judgine those who do use that approch but not endorsing it at all either.

I have a few family members who have always been there for me when I needed someone, and I would surely help them out. The rest of them, however, wouldn't get a dime...LOL

If I will have a lot of money, definiteley I will help them. And that is by helping them how to fish and not just give them fish. Because if you really want to help people financially, you have to teach them how to make a living. They have to realize the importance of money. And I'm very willing to help those who really strive hard to have a better life.

Of course, if my family members need the money I'll definitely give it to them to help them out, but I would expect some sort of repayment in the future, whether it be the money, or just something thoughtful. Doesn't have to be a material thing. And if they waste the money then I'll definitely tell them "No," cause if I give them any more they'll just waste it all senselessly again, and that wouldn't be helping either of us.

I will surely help them, but if i find that their habit is ruined due to me, like they have taken their life easily as i help them for their living and they have take it it as liberty. So the thing is that if any of my family member looses his dignity, i mean if he becomes shameless. I will surely stop helping him. Coz i hate this kind of people. But i will never stop helping my mom, dad, brother and the one who are close to me.. That's it.

If the relatives needed the money for an emergency then I would definitely be more than happy to help out. I don't think I would give money to them just because I have a lot of extra cash. It would be hard to say no, but if you don't be assertive, often times other people can take advantage of your kindness.