i stay in the same house with a girl, but i don`t love her. Please help me.

Yeah I agree that it is all your fault but since you are already in that situation the least you can do is to settle that problem. If you feel that the girl you're living with loves you then study her acts. After that plan the necessary actions that you could do. You can tell her that your feelings for her is only for a friend. It is better to be honest with her since you are on the same roof than lie to her. Inform her that you care for her as a friend and that you can no longer offer anything more beyond friendship. Communication is always the best way to settle things that are giving us trouble. Just use light and polite words that will not hurt too much. Let us face it she will be hurt but it is the only way to end your misery. Misery to yourself because you can not face her and explain that to her. Believe me after you do that you will feel free. There is nothing wrong on living together as long as your relationship is clear.

I think you owe it to her to be honest. tell her that you would like her to live there but you think you should be friends. But i would wait till she has a new bf come around to bring a new girlfriend home.. that would be plenty awkward.

I believe that the best thing for you to do is to be honest with her about your feelings. You may both need to find new roommates. If her feelings for you are so strong that she has cried, she may not be able to continue to live with you. But being honest is still the right thing to do.

Wow...at this point, it has gone way too far. I don't see how you could just be friends. She does have a right to know your true feelings. It sounds to me as if you called her up and asked her back because you needed help with house payments? Did I read you right on that? You led her to believe that it was because you cared about her? Now things are going good for you, you want to send her packing again but still be friends?? You want to be a good friend? If so then you should clue her in to what a lousy friend you really are. You'd be doing her the best favor that you have done her thus far. You started right off by saying that you didn't and don't like her. It sounds as if you are looking to ease your guilt as you know you used her and you know it is wrong.

When you date someone break up with them, then ask them to come live with you, you have to understand how this would look to her. Your leading her on without knowing it. When you asked her to come live with you, you probably should have stated your intentions. If you told her this was stricly as friends then if anythings gone on she should still keep that as an understanding. However has anything happened since you both moved in together that would suggest more than a friendship to her? Point is I don't think you should have asked her to move in with you especally since there was a past between you two. If you don't like her then you shouldn't really be using her so that you have to pay half of your rent. Either way this situation was created by you and should stop with you. The easiest and the hardest solution is simple. Tell her your feelings, your intentions of this move in and what you expect to see from here on out. Specify that you don't want her to get the wrong idea so you want to be sure this is clearly understood.

Hello delkar. I think you should be very honest with her. Time passed by, and each time passed she will keep loving you more. It is better if you tell her about this asap. She will suffer more if you don't tell her this urgently. If you can't speak with her. Why don't you try to love her? Sometimes love can be taught. Good luck my friend.

Just to clarify, is she paying rent too? If not, the just tell her to live elsewhere because you need the finances to pay for rent. Anyway, if you guys aren't sleeping together and you don't hate her I don't really see the problem. What's wrong with living with your ex who you don't love when you have separate rooms anyway? Maybe if you start seeing someone else then the girl will be uncomfortable and just leave on her own will. :)

The only thing to do is to be honest with her and tell her how you really feel. While time passes this situation will just get worse and worse so don´t wait too long to tell her the truth.

Be good to her like she is with you and honest too. Then slowly give her hints that you dont like her. Make her understand it by her own before you tell it. I know to me to say it is a easier than to actually do it

hmmm. i think you should try to get a new place and straight things out with her. find yourself a new place first before you explain these things to her. at least you have a place to stay IF she kicks you out of the house. because the more you stay longer with her, you are just hurting yourself and later hurt her more again. and i;m sure you don't want this to happen again. before things get more complicated and before it gets worse i reckon you to move to a new place. but the both of you still can be friends. try to have a slow talk to her. i think she can understand if you explain things properly and use the right words to her.

You should have told her when she came to stay with you for the first time. So she was your ex girlfriend and you wanted her to stay with you because you didn't want to make her cry. May I ask you questions? During her stay with you, what do you do exactly to her? I mean do you show to her that you are just a friend by not being intimate to her? Do you see her reaction toward your being aloof to her?

This has t be handled very softly.If go and tell her directly ,it will not be wise.So tell her that you are not suitable one for her and make her choose any other guy.Make her understand that you take care of her and thats why you do this. OK,this is just my suggestion.ignore this if it is not suitable to you.

In my opinion, it would be better for you to open up your real feelings towards her. For sure, this will hurt her, but it is the only way to make things right. Just try to imagine that you are in her shoes and that your friend or ex-boyfriend called you up again, asking you to be with him...you would joyfully respond because you still love him. Nevertheless, you learned from someone else that your ex-boyfriend just asked you to stay with him because he just needs company. What will you feel? Isn't it that it is more hurting?...I hope this helps:)

the first thing to do is to be honest with her, you can say it in a way that would not hurt her feelings. You can say that you don't wanna lose her, and she is important to you, but friendship is only you can offer. And whatever happens you'll always be with her no matter what. If she couldn't still understand, then you have to give her up, because the more that she sees you everyday like what you said that you're living on the same roof, the more she wouldn't get over you.

Dear delkar, I assume that you are a very quite person. Guys like you will makes girls wonder fr what was you thinking, And i think that she wait you to tell her something. She will wonder do my cook well or what did you allow in the house or not.. My friend, Sometimes we cannot make somebody to read our mind. To have a guts to make her understand, say something. or if you don't like something , say it. Teach her to know you and teach her a manner in the table (i read about it in your comment post that she fart after meal) Say it. You know, sometimes Real communication make things better. All the best Happy posting always !! oxox'dian from bali island.

Ohhh thats bad. You are being unselfish and insensitive. You are betraying her in terms of emotion. You have to try thinking of putting yourself with her and what will you feel then? If you think it is good and okay for you, then go... Just let it be... But if you think it will hurt you and broke your heart at the end, then, you have to make a decision NOW!!! Be true and express yourself. Dont hide things especailly when it comes to emotions and feelings.okay? BE A MAN!!!

this is how I see it. you haven't let go of your ex, the one that you had 2 yrs relationship with. you might think you have, but you haven't. let it go. she is gone now, no longer in your life. once you are completely free of your past, it will be easier to move on. you will know what exactly you want, who you want to have relationship with and if you don't want to have relationship with this new girl, you will know what to say. but first, you will have to completely close the door behind you. this new girl has nothing to do with your ex or your past relationship. you should see her as an entirely new element in your life, friend or not. you said you didn't like her, but why you called her to share house bills, among all people? you don't want her suffer but you already caused her pain with this uncertainty. so take a break, take a vacation go somewhere alone for a week or more and clear your mind. maybe visit a relative or a friend that lives out of town, meeting someone that knows you well is a good idea. once your mind is clear you will know what to do. what her reaction will be, that's hers to deal with.

Sorry but it seems you did a very confusing thing to begin w/. I don't understand why you have called her to stay w/ you when you don't like to have any romantic relationship w/ her anymore. Just being friends w/ her might sound a little odd considering that you guys had been together for a while. And calling her back to stay w/ you sounds like wanting her back in your life and I guess she's pretty much interpreting it that way. If you're calling her back is for you to have some company and to have somebody to share w/ the expenses in the house w/o minding her feelings at all then I guess you are both selfish and insensitive. if you don't want to move in another house (as an excuse to let her go) then I guess you should be honest w/ her so you won't be hurting her more.

I think you are a very good person with a soft heart at that. Who knows, you already love your girl. If you don't care a bit about her, so what IF she cries. If you think that you can't love her the way you wanted to love someone, tell it straight to her face so that she will not be expecting so much from you. Just be careful not to have a child with her because it will add more complication to your already complicated life. The best thing that you could do is set her free. It is unfair for you and her to stick with each other where in fact you know that there is no future for the two of you. She is no comfort woman, I guess.

well cant u get another roommate other than your ex-girlfriend?? I suggest you have a chat with this unfortunate girl and tell her how you feel about your situation.. Tell her that you will be bringing girls home and she should be okay with that.. and i dont understand why you cannot be with her if you care about her so much.