Would you give another chance if ur bf/gf cheated.

yes he/she should be given one chance not only for u and him but also of u have kids. Kids need both parents.

yeah thats true girl. especially if you love him and everything.

Love is something which is not under your control and yes everyone deserve a second chance but then if given a second chance it shd be clear to the cheating partner it is last chance.

For one I dont have kids and if I did and he cheated I wouldnt stay with him for them. People shouldnt stay in an unhealthy relationship just for the kids sake. And 2 Obviously he wouldnt be truely sorry if he had to go cheat in the first place.

I understand but what about the children and what if he genuinely feels sorry and never do it again?

Thx for ur thoughts artaucan. highly apprecited.

you´re welcome, and I hope I didn´t cause a deeper confussion on you, but the truth of the matter is that you have to love yourself and never let anybody hurt you that way, if they do, it´s their loss but more importantly do not let him do it AGAIN, I´ve been there and know what it´s like, good luck and God bless

i think if that is the long distance cases, it is really easy to get involve sexually with another person because everyone has physical need. if i am in long distance relationship, if my partner need something physical i would prefer / like him to discuss with me about it first. if i say yes ok you can do that go for it i know who you want is me, it is just you need something physical that i am so far away from you i cannot satisfy you from here. i would let them do that if that is what they want. but at last they will come back to me. but then to be honest, a genuine person would not do something like that even after you said : "it's ok, go for it".

Hi, I agree with you. I would be more willing to go along with it under those circumstances. Perhaps, you could even talk them out of it! But that's beside the point. Cheating is sort of a pet peeve of mine. I just don't think it's justifiable in any case really. But, long distance relationships do put a damper on things. I'd always be afraid I'd get left out in the cold if my bf was allowed to "roam." thanks!

Hello, Thanks for the response. I guess I should elaborate as I was in a bit of hurry when I posted that comment. I was more or less referring to long distance types of relationships that may or may not be 100% committed. Sorry, for the confusion. I think I have confused myself now. I do not support extramarital affairs or infidelity for any reason other than what I stated above. Even then, the thought makes me cringe. I never really could understand why people cheat in the first place. If they are so unhappy, why don't they just leave. The ones that bother me more are those who claim to be happy with you and cheat anyway. I don't which hurts more, the cheating or trying to pull the wool over your eyes. meow & ciao!

suppose he feels ashamed of what he did and feels sorry and promise genuinely not to do it again... for kids sake...

Even if he is ashamed and feels sorry for what he has done even then i will not accept him because cheating and betrayal is something which i cannot tolerate and as far as kids are concerned i will manage because i am financially sound .

I might only if after being with himfor over 10 or 15 years and it was only one time. I might forgive him but I'd never be able to forget and he would not be sleeping with me until we renewed our relationship and got it back on a good ground. I don't really know. I'd always remember that he did it, on the other hand he also would know that he did "me" wrong. That is something he would also have to live with that he hurt me so much. It's something we would both have to over come if we could. I'm not saying it would work out if this was the way we did it. But if you have had a bunch of good years with someone and they messed up one time would you just throw away what you had? If I had a husband that cheated on me early in the marriage, he would be gone. That's it. I don't have much invested in that relationship. There are many extinuating circumstances in my case. I love my husband and I know he loves me. We have problems like most couples and working through them shows our character and how much we care for the other person. Are you saying I should kick him out or cheat on him to show him how it felt. I'm not that kind of person. If after one mistake that happened one time I would hope that I'd get another chance if I did wrong and know it.

So u might forgive ur mate but after totally humiliation. It would strain relationship more.

I understand what you have gone through. And it is very difficult to regain trust but if the person tries hard to regain it then it is not impossible to give the trust back.

LOL!!...That's an American expression!

so only bed not life..so u mean to say he has to go to couch to sleep and call u there

Tiohwji thx for replying and i can see ur such a smart guy and can scheme well.. Thank god i didnt ever cross swords with you.:D

thx lucky for ur comments. highly apprecited.

U are a mature guy and it is not that she might have cheated because of you it can be she liked someone much more than you at that point and once faced with consequences seeing your hurt and realizing what she did then things do come back on track again. Time heals wounds but it takes long time to forget though forgiven is much easier to do.

Right bye bye what what after that. You find a new mate and you dont want to check his history. If you check it then probably you would find he is lonely because his gf/wife left him because he cheated on her so it would be like going from one cheater to another. And whats the gurantee next mate you find wont cheat on you?

There is no guarantee that anyone won't cheat on you like there is no guarantee when you buy brand new tires that you won't have a flat the next day. You learn from your experience and you try to be a little smarter next time and take your time to choose a mate..but even then no one can guarantee he will be the ONE. I got fed up and decided now to live alone and enjoy the single life. I don't need absolutely a man to be happy. Actually am happier alone than with a man..no more aggravation or having to punch in the clock or prepare meals, endure his humours or wash his clothes, call him to say I will be late..etc etc. I got married when i was 17 and became single only at 52.. so now am 65 and veeeeeeeery happy..now am living my single life that I didn't have..and no intention of getting married. Actually I refuse all demands of marriage. I'm having too much fun besides I have had kids, I have grt grand kids and grand kids and grt aunt..so what more do I need? Nothing. I have money, I am my own boss, I do what I want when I want. I'm always on the go, I don,t have time to be lonely..anyway I have never been the type to be lonely even if I was married and he was on a trip. I kept myself busy witht the kids, my music, etc etc. ahhhh..1:45 am and am still up..if I had a man..I would have to go to bed with him..ouffffff..so happy am alone..trust me being single isn't lonely as people would like to make it out to be.

you are right. communication is very important. i really appreciate it when my partner ask me first what they want. then less problem will be created.

suppose you are married to her for 15 years and you have two small kids. Wont you try for sake of them that you forgive her and take a promise that she would behave in future.

Ktosea you are a nice man yet know what you want.