Talk Me Out of Kidnapping You..........

Well how about the fact that no one wants me enough to pay for my return, that I could never be a human shield I'd have a heart attack and they would have to hold me up, I guess that I could cook for them, but I tend to forget if I've already put the salt in and my taster doesn't work well enough for me to tell. I'd be pretty much of a liability, Blessings of being old

Of course there are perks to getting older. I find the whole idea of breaching granny panties and exploring varicose veins under boobs perfectly acceptable. If only I could find the granny! LOL. As I get older I have to try less, know more, care less, am expected to be a moron by anyone younger so can get away with things that I used not to, like dancing badly in the cinema to Mamma Mia - the worlds worst film of the last......, oh let's say EVER, it's true; and treated like a favoured son by those older than me. Now, just to make things easier. What time will you be leaving the house to go wherever on foot next. Don't look behind you and how are you about travelling in the boot of cars for shortish distances? LOL.

I do so love your mind. Make sure you donate it to science when you go to the great big castle in the sky someday, OK? Just make sure you don't die for a VERY long time. Well, I don't know the advantage of aging really. I'm about to turn 28. But I know the advantage of being a 6 foot tall women who is overweight. I don't think anyone would like to have to drag me into a car. And if we got into a fight and I sat on them, it would probably kill them. hee hee

Naw, I think any kidnapper would want me. I am sexy, good looking and got all the right things going on. I am also young and rich and my last name is Hilton. Ok Time to wake up now!!. Nice dream eh?? and that is what I do best at my age. DREAM!!! hehe. But the main reason a kidnapper wouldnt want me is because I'm poorer than dirt. lol

Kidnapper better watch out because I can hit him in the face with my saggy boobies LMAO

The only perk I've noticed is that no one asks me for id in bars anymore. It's a pain in the a$$ to dig through my wallet to find it... and now I don't have to.

Oh sparks they wouldn't want to see me when I have to pull out my top teetha dn brush my whole mouth encluding the teeth in hand. Many people cringe when they see you have to take them out for something stuck under the darn things, lol. I also have to go pee alot they would get tired of having to let me go. I hurt so bad if I sit very long so they would get tired of me saying, I need to move, let me lay down I hurt and then let me get up I must sit up I'm hurting too bad to lay here. If they tire dme up feet and hands they would have to undo me way too many times for bathroom breaks. Although like you I can't move quick and I'm slow when I do so they would really have no need to tie me up. They would get tired of hearing me trying to reason with them and asking about the medicines that they forgot to get that I have to have. They'd freak out to see me having a seizer because they didn't get my medicines for that. My blood presure rises so high when I seize that I can have a heart attck or anuerizm, so I think I'd really just be too much trouble for them to care for. LOL

[i]This is very funny sparks..Great thinking! Let me think about me....I am very vigilant to people and for sure before they can get me, I am already shouting and yelling to alarm anyone around!LOL![/i]

I don't have money or anyone in the family with money - so kidnapping me is useless. I once read an U.N.C.L.E. fan story called, I think, "Ransom of U.N.C.L.E. Chief" kind of based off of "Ransom of Red Chief." where a couple of inept Thrush agents abduct Mr. Waverly.

Well, I guess if you were old enough to have false teeth then you could take them out and ask them to hold them for you and they might be grossed out enough to let you go. LOL!! I think that would make a great story for a news headline, don't you? Woman/Man uses teeth to scare kidnapper away!

Well, I'd have to lie. And, I'm not good at that, but I think I could get forgiveness in that situation. I could tell them I had a dangerous disease that was catching if they touched me. Maybe I could act deranged? Probably wouldn't be too hard to do.

My last boyfriend said, if I were ever kidnapped, he wouldn't have to worry about paying a ransom as they would pay him to take me back after about an hour or so!!! Why you wouldn't want to kidnap me??? If it ain't sagging or bagging, it's all dried up. So I ain't got nothing that ain't broke!!! Nice of you to remember my birthday lady!!!

I have chronic pain in my left leg, which would make me a whiny pain in the patootie to anyone unlucky enough to kidnap me. And going up stairs leaves me a tad winded. And I'm only 24. Yeah, aging is going to be LOTS of fun for me! I hope no one ever kidnaps me - I'm kind of a smart@ss, so I'd probably inadvertantly get them to shoot me in the head within an hour.

The sad thing is your part right and part wrong. Some of those weirdos out there would be turned off. But, then there are some that would be turned on. I saw a show where this guy in his twenty's married a grandma because he was turned on by her.The older the better he said! So, if you do get kidnapped make sure you are turning them off and not on!!! And, the only thing I find better about getting older is I can get set in my weird ways and when someone say's you can't do that or why did you do that I say, "I have been doing it like that for years so live with it!" My husband say's, "That works for me!" ** Peace and Love get's you through everything in Life **

Lol Spark I love it but do not build your Hopes up as I do not believe any of what you are saying You are as old as you feel so you are about 25

Some kiddnappers can be awful sick and want to get into panties. And I really cant talk about laxitives,or polident (never had to use it) My brain is working all the time. aslo have read about some great grannies that fight robbers off with a bat!

LOL I'm just over 40 but I reckon I could talk the hind legs off a donkey as the expression goes. I know I could whine for England and listening to my constant whingeing the kidnappers would probably pay others to take me AWAY from them! I could just go into "lecture" mode and talk at them until they had no choice but to release me or go mad from listening to me babbly on incessantly :) And God help them if they kidnapped when I have PMT cos even the devil would run scared from me then hehe!

ROFLMAO!!!!!!! and they THINK I'm nuts!!!!! girl, you got me beat by a country mile!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Sparky, there are NO advantages to advancing age! Have you not heard about how senior citizens still get kidnapped? LOL! Ok, all joking aside, the nutcases who abduct senior citizens are not doing it because grandma is hot. They probably also don't care if grandma's depends are leaking either or if she is thinking about breaking her bifocals and stabbing his knee with it when he's not looking. I suppose that maybe they wouldn't want to hear someone who talks nonstop about non entertaining subjects, and often the younger generation is not thrilled with subjects important to the older generation...but again that might be why serious kidnappers carry gags.

LOL Kidnappers might not want you because of your age, but rapists don't generally discriminate over age! I've watched too many of those crime shows on TV, I guess. LOL Let's see... advantages to getting old.. hmmm... well, sometimes you can get ahead in lines if you look pathetic enough! If you take a bus, you have a better chance of getting a seat if it's crowded, especially if you "stare down" a younger man who's already seated! Hmmm, Oh! There are those discounts for "senior citizens"! Sometimes, they begin at age 55!!! AARP, too! (Not sure if they have that in Canada, but here in the States, we can join AARP (ummm, Association for the Advancement of Retarded People? Nah... I believe it's 'Retired People') at age 50. Hmmm, any more perks? Well, we can get out of doing a lot of things if there's someone around who is younger. We generally have enough experience under our belts to be able to intimidate younger people into helping us... guilt them right into it! Other than that, I honestly can't think of another thing... growing old sucks! Oh, well, we CAN smirk at those perky young things in the skin-tight jeans who flaunt their youth and KNOW that that attitude of theirs is going to change drastically once gravity starts grabbing hold of THEIR bodies, too. Hahahaha! ("Oh, hon, are YOU in for a surprise!") Hmmm... Oh! My boys will be over here in a FLASH if I tell them I need help with anything. Ten years ago, they would have given me excuses as to why they couldn't help but now guilt grabs 'em by the you-know-what until they get their butts over here and help me!