should i leave him?

In my opinion your boyfirnd is right, you should leave him because to live together in future is more painful then the recent pain, I think you leave him, I know how difficult it is but its all about your life, so leave him and try to be happy.

Dear girl, only you can make that decision. Are you able to give him the support and encouragement he needs? Hard as it sounds, sometimes love is not enough. The fact that you are asking if you should stay or go makes me think that you are not sure yourself. Is his injury permanent, or will he ever regain any use in his hand? What do his doctors say about this? Am I correct in thinking that he worked with his hands? If this is so, that would explain why he thinks he's useless and can't support a family. I don't know what country you are from, but I'm sure there must be therapy of some sort so he can be re-trained for another job. The most important thing now is for him to accept that he has this disability and to work on what he can do in the future. I leave you with my prayers and best wishes.

Let him blurt out his feelings understand that in his situation he will feel depressed. Right now if you really love him then be patient and show him that you still love her despite the circumstances. If you can bring him out of his depression then he will understand it. I admire you for your courage to stay with him and the love that endures with you at this point in time.

Is it something permanent, or with fisio-theraphy he might use again his hand? It's understandable that he wishes for you the best, he loves you and wants to see you happy. He's probably used to be a good provider, and being unable to use his hand, makes him angry and frustrated and bitter. If you love him as he does, than you might want to go to seek some theraphy council.Mental.So it can explain both what to expect and how to deal with the problem, in time, with no more bitterness and anger.

Hi,iansheila,dear friend~I am so sad to hear the information that your boyfriend met an accident in last year.I have been split up with my girlfriend last year. I know the feeling after we broken up. I can give you suggestion about that will you leave you boyfriend in the future. But I just want you to know that this moment is important time you stay with him.If you leave him,he will feel very sad now. In any case,I think you should accompany him to raise a good disease. Best wish to you and your boyfriend. Good luck to you !!

it really depends on how you help him to regain his self confidence. if you are unable to help him with this, it won't help if you stay with him. marriage is a whole life matter & you can't regret in the future if you choose not to leave. remember that even a small murmuring in the future will hurt him much more than if you choose to leave him now. at least you must be able to convince him that he still can support the family with any other works using only one arm. don't ever suggest that you can work & support the family. it won't help.

If you love him, then you should stay with him and help him. We are to take each other for better or worst,richer or poorer, in sickness and in health. I don't see why he thinks that he is helpless as there is plenty that he should be able to do. He can marry you if he stops feeling sorry for himself. My daughter is dating a guy that has spina bifia and is in a wheelchair (at age 25) adn he works as a produce clerk in a supermarket. He does about anything that he wants to do -hunts,rides ATV's , etc. All your boyfriend needs to do is decide for himself that he is not helpless.

Firstly, you must try to analyze your true feeling, is it really love or you just pity him for his condition? Lets be realistic here, if you were to marry him, will you be able to support him financially and emotionally for the rest of your life? If the answer is yes, by all means, don't leave him. You really have to think this hard and long for your decisions will affect your future. But then again, if physical disability does not change how you feel about him, may be you have found your true love. Once you have found the answers, go ahead and don't look back. Good luck.

well all things can work for the better. I mean things can still be done even if he cannot use his hand. I would think about him getting on disability to help out with the income thing and maybe make some calls to see if there are services in your local area that might be able to assist him in finding work that he can do. I hope this helps, and personally I would not leave him just becasue he has not use of one hand, there is more to life than money and if you love him this should not matter at all. I hope I helped and good luck with your decision making.

If you love him very much and if you have confidence that you can stay with him happily then well i suggest to be with him, when now he is unable to move his hand after accident but he will soon recover and be alright, when if a person has confidence in himself then he can win every battle in life.

I believe that in life, everything happens for a reason, and that there is nothing we are faced with that we are not strong enough to handle. If you know in your heart that he is the person you should be with for the rest of your life, then you should stay with him. If you think he is not the one for you (and I would leave his disability out of this) then you should leave him. If you two want to stay together, you will find a way to make it work. You shouldn't feel obligated to stay with him out of pity if you feel he's not right for you in other ways, but you also should not leave if you feel he is right for you. This sounds like an incredibly hard decision and situation. I wish you both the best and God bless.

I am sorry to say it ,but i think you have to leave him, cause if you do love him as much as you said you wouldnt ask this question at all and you would know the answer. Eventually you are going to leave him after a time cause things will get worse. So leave him now and dont make his and your life a misery. Correct me if i am wrong, but love is unquestionable and in your case it is not. Sorry again but that is the truth. The choice is always yours.

Hi Iansheila.. I understand what you going through right now. I know there are a lot of things that are coming in your mind. An I'm sure some of them are contradicting each other. I have read the previous responses and generally, what will I tell you is similar to what they said. If you really love him, stay with him. You should work this out together. Losing a hand does not mean losing the whole of him. Girl, it is just a right hand. Banking on the thing he has lost is not the right thing to do. You should remember that he still has his left hand, his both feet, both eyes, both ears, etc, etc, etc... My point is, he is still that same person that you loved before he met that accident. Now, what you can do is help him realize to accept what happend. The only way to move on in this situation is to accept it. Second, think of alternatives that you can do. Losing a hand does not make him totally useless and worthless. There are a lot of jobs out there that he will be able to excel. Last, let him feel how important he is to you. In this way, he will gain confidence and he will learn to take care of himself. Hope this helps girl. The best of luck to both of you.

if you love him, then stay with him. imagine him thinking, he got into an accident, and the woman he loves most in the world left him. how does that make you feel? can you leave him? so if you love him and willing to make some sacrifice, then stay and care for him. ask him what if you were the one who got into an accident, will he stay and take care of you or will he leave you?

Just because he is not able to use his right hand does not mean that he is not capeable of supporting his family. There are plenty of jobs that he can do or even jobs that he things he cant do now that he can adapt to with one useable hand. Love means forever. The good, the bad and the ugly. Support him, and love him. He is probably feeling pretty vulnerable right now. Its important to show him that you do love him and that your ready to climb any mountain that his disability throws your way.

If you love him...then NO you should not leave him. He is not useless at all just because his right hand is disabled. There are people that lose limbs and still are valuable to society and also very much loved and able to give love. Your boyfriend needs some councelling for his ego which is obviously very low. He still has much to offer, I'm sure of it. Push him to get into councilling. Would he love you any less if you got into an accident and could not walk or were disabled or disfigured in some way? Love is not only just about money. It's not like he is just being lazy and expecting you to support him. He had an accident and is struggling. He has a valid reason for not being able to support his family right now. Right now, he needs his family's support. That is what families do. They have each other's back.

If you truly love him, stay with him, and work things through. Let him know that you love. Perhaps you and your boyfriend should talk about this. I can understand that talking about his hand and the accident may be a sensitive issue for him. This is normal. But I think that, if you guys talk about it, it may help him feel slightly better about this event, and it may also help you to understand what he's going through. I think that this is the first step to the healing process.

no...u must stay....instead o leaving him,,,kindly stay beside him....he needs ur support,love and care,,,, this the ry tym to show to him that u love him...

isn't that the best opportunity to show how much you love him? your guy is so lucky! love him even more, this is the moment that he needs you most. cheers! make love grow fonder!

if u two both think there is true love between u, i suggest that u stay with him. life is nothing but u two. u love him so much, knowing how to talk to him, how to comfort him etc., however ,life isnt so easy, maybe to him ,life is so cruel, but he need to go on, not stop to sigh. u 'll be the key to open his door. and he'll be happy because of u. bless u two.