The solidarity of the Lot is a wonderful thing. Embrace it!
By Sparks
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
Regina, Saskatchewan
February 22, 2009 2:18pm CST
Twice in as many days I have come across a couple of newbie jerks who think that they know us all here better than we know ourselves, or understand the choices between what is right and what is wrong better than anyone else on the face of the planet.
Well giggle my google, they couldn't be more wrong.
The lot is unique. People form friendships here that become their source of comfort in many ways. They come here to rant, rave, vent and relieve their stress as well as to reconnect with the sheer fun life can be
Most new users are smart enough to surf and post quietly and respectfully before they begin to come out of their shells.
It is actually rare to see a jerk come on so strong in the beginning that the immediate reaction of circles of friends is to slap that newbie upside the head!
So to all you newbies who think that just because you can use big words, quote authors you found on google, or have lived through rough times people here are just beginning to face, THINK before you type. Put yourself in the other person's shoes and try to see WHY they feel the way they do, instead of telling them how wrong they are. They could very well be wrong. So what? It's THEIR life, their choice, their right to feel they way they do. It is not YOUR right to make them feel worse.
The solidarity of the Lot is a wonderful thing.
Embrace it.
But don't for one minute think you can break it.
Many have tried and they aren't here anymore.......
Is respect too much to ask?
11 people like this
26 responses
@Adoniah (7513)
• United States
22 Feb 09
I certainly am glad that I have been keeping a low profile for the past months. I haven't seen any of this. I have noticed that there are only a few people posting decent discusions to respond to. Yours being in that category. I hope you are not the one being disrespected!
Shalom~Adoniah
6 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
No not me Adoniah. People can verbally slap me around all they want, and I'll give as good as I get. But when people start messing unfairly with my friends, I get right up their nose! LOL
4 people like this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
22 Feb 09
Good one, Adoniah. I gotta remember that when I start using a cane. Priceless, you're my type of person. 
ROFLMAO!
ROFLMAO!3 people like this
@TLChimes (4822)
• United States
22 Feb 09
Please! I love it here. I like the people, the place, and the nuts and bolts.
Why come into someones playground and mess in the sand box? If the new kids can't be good they should be sent home.
Now where's my hug?
Did I look around long enough before jumping in the pool? I think I settled right in the middle of the game without too much looking around. And so far it's worked out for me.6 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
Mine too! Doin' the happy dance................
4 people like this
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
23 Feb 09
No it is not to much to ask. Sadly there are many who still don't understand that. One look at the leaderboard though tells the myLot story quite well. Sure, even some of the "higher" members are gone as well, but that doesn't take away from the strength of those still here.
My personal favorites are those newbies that don't know the rules and then jump on us when we "spoil someone's fun" by giving a friendly heads up that they did something not allowed.
5 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
23 Feb 09
I'm all for giving a friendly heads up when I believe the user is really clueless.
But some people just overdo their own superiority and oddly they seem to single out users that have little or no defenses. And THAT is cruel and not to be tolerated from the get go. Nice to see you foxy!
3 people like this
@mummymo (23706)
•
23 Feb 09
Hey Sparks - so glad to see that nothing has changed while I've been MIA! lol You are so right about the lot and all the benefits to being here and the wonderful support and friendships you can find here , it really is so easy if ONLY you have the minimum of common decency and respect for others. I did see one of the newbies you talk o and think that they are probably used to not being contradicted , rather they think that they should fawned over and it was a shock to them to not get their own way. here is hoping that these users will see the error of their ways and how much better they could make their life if only they tried to play nice with the other children! xxx
5 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
23 Feb 09
And if they can't, just take their toys and go home. They won't be missed! LOL
4 people like this
@Paula1966 (1102)
• United States
22 Feb 09
Hi spark,
I can't help but wonder if the internet "depersonalizes" interactions nowadays. No more hand-written notes, no making eye contact with people you converse with on a regular basis. So since the personal touch is gone, treating others like people vanishes. You never see them, so you can be as rude as you want.
Or, like Loud implied, they aren't actually "new". 
5 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
23 Feb 09
I know what you meant Paula. LOL No worries. I use the collective 'you' all the time and then worry people think I mean them personally. And it's because of what you said about the depersonalization so prevalent today. Especially in a medium like the lot. But outright rudeness is NEVER acceptable no matter what the circumstances.
3 people like this
@Paula1966 (1102)
• United States
23 Feb 09
BTW, that is not "you" as in Spark... that is "you" as in the all-encompassing "you" meaning the people about whom you're talking.
5 people like this
@mrsl2008 (634)
•
22 Feb 09
I've only been here for 3 weeks!! I'm a "newbie" & proud of it!!! I like to think I have been respectful and quiet!!
I have called some guy an idiot as he posted a discussion called something like Girls are so lazy compared to boys!!!
And in answer to your question respect is not to much to ask and you'll have no problem from me x
Oooo! you've just given me an idea to post
Until next time:-)
5 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
Good answer. Welcome to the lot mrsl. I'm sure you'll be a welcome addition, and please do call an idiot an idiot if and only if they deserve it!
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
You're more than welcome.
3 people like this
@Darkwing (21583)
•
22 Feb 09
Hear hear! I don't think a lot of newbies understand what the word "discussion" means. They think giving their opinion means opposing everything anybody says. Well, think again, newbies. Discussion is a diplomatic way of putting your point so that you don't hurt others, but debate differences, until an amicable solution to a person's discussion is reached. There are a lot of very valuable discussions go out on this site, and a lot of mundane, day-to-day questions which will normally be treated the way they deserve to be and ignored.
However, that doesn't give you the right... any of you... to start ploughing into people who've been valued members here for a long time, tearing their discussions apart and ending them abruptly. Diplomacy, tact and respect is what's required and if you don't have that, you don't belong here, like your many predecessors!
Sorry, Sparks... I directed this more at the newbie than you, but I hear what you're saying and it rants with me also. Brightest Blessings my dear friend.
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
22 Feb 09
Hi spark!
There are lots n lots of newer Lotters now compared to only a few months back - must be the crisis 
I'm trying my hardest to help some and some are willing to be helped too.
The others? Respect appears to have gone out of fashion 
I'm trying my hardest to help some and some are willing to be helped too.
The others? Respect appears to have gone out of fashion 5 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
Sure has. And when disrespect descends to the level of cruelty, I really draw the line!
5 people like this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
22 Feb 09
I missed it by 1.
Well, you and bella, et al really told him, didn't ya?
Way to go girls! I woulda jumped on in there, but by the time I got there, you had him licking your boots. Good job!
Newbie, shmewbie. He was just too flip when he didn't know nuttin about nuttin anyway.3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
23 Feb 09
I think bella was the one that really brought him down! LOL I'm giving her the credit anyway. NEVER mess with our bella when she has a toothache! ROFL
3 people like this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
23 Feb 09
What a trio of names we would be, eh.
Think about it;
BellaofChaos, Sparkofinsanity and Rootin' Tootin' AnnieOakey1.
WOW!
Ridin' through the old western towns, well, surely you could think of a story to make of it, eh?
3 people like this
@Barb42 (4214)
• United States
22 Feb 09
AMEN, Sparks! I was once a Newbie, but I don't think I ever did anything like that. Some people stick their foot in their mouth once they put their fingers on the keyboard because 'they lived it'. RIGHT - but you never lived in the shoes of those on here who come to talk about life's woes or joys and don't really know how they feel. Further more, they don't know these people like you said, so be careful what you say! Life brings on it's own miseries, and we sure don't need a jerk adding to those miseries!
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
It's tough to be a newbie, but with time and respect, that hump is gotten over and then the fun and fellowship really begins. It's not rocket science. So when people like the two I've run across in the past few days behave with such cruelty, me NOT being a newbie, it is going to make me mad. Especially when friends are unfairly attacked. And I wasn't the first one to speak up against them! LOL
4 people like this
@Barb42 (4214)
• United States
22 Feb 09
I understand that. He was the first I've come in contact with in awhile. Sort of a smartie because he'd been through it. Shucks, we've all had bad times, but please don't tell me to ditch my husband when you know absolutely nothing about either of us. AND please don't think I'm just whining because I can. Made me want to throw a wet noodle at him.
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
Yep, that's one of the ones! Glad you saw what I'm getting at. Made my blood boil it did, and on SUNDAY of all days!
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
Start wearing flats! ROFL
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
With big silver buckles and nail studs along the side? Come on, picture it! ROFL
3 people like this
@leenie50 (3992)
• United States
22 Feb 09
Daffy,
You said what many of us have wanted to say but your words were very clear and to the point. When I use the word Mylot, it brings to mind Camelot. It is such a place of warmth and comfort. It's also a place to laugh and forget how much pain you may be in for whatever reason. It's a place to go and visit with your special and wonderful friends that you have come to know over time. If that is what you are looking for then do your part. Post discussions and reply to your responders. Always reply to your responders. I said that twice because to me, it is respectful and you will make more friends by following the rules. If you have any questions, just ask. If you are here to cause trouble, then don't expect to be here long. There are so many good people here, enjoy them and learn something.
leenie
5 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
23 Feb 09
Well said Louie.
This is a community. We depend on each other for certain things.
Cruelty is NOT one of them, and I won't stand for it.
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
22 Feb 09
A dear friend got attacked, and I've never made any bones about how I react to THAT!
Thanks for having my back Pat. Check mentalward's latest discussion #2 response.....
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
24 Feb 09
Well they gave me my account back twice in as many days, so the system works. lol
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
23 Feb 09
I agree sparks, respect is a beautiful thing, so is compassion and empathy but the meaning of those words have gone off to the wayside. What a real shame and a waste of the human race. We're not suppose to act like unfeeling animals because we have the ability to think with our minds instead of our bellies so why is it that we have these jerks in earth to walk amoungst us? I'll never know or understand.
Hey! Your other discussion was deleted! Why?
3 people like this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
23 Feb 09
Not if I can help it!! It's probably the very reason I can't get it to go up any.... Mine will probably go down too but you know what? If it's done because I stood up to wrong doing, then I'll wear my number with pride!!
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
23 Feb 09
Jealousy.
I've posted another one to make up for the loss of points to every one.........
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
23 Feb 09
Wanna bet my star is down tomorrow too? Idiot trolls.
Idiot trolls.3 people like this
@novataylor (6570)
• United States
23 Feb 09
I'm SOOOOOOO glad I missed the fracas. And it sounds like our beautiful Bella took care of the offender in short order. No surprise there, eh? Respect is what we all give each other, those of us who know what that means, and respect is what we in turn deserve. Those that don't recognize the concept can go somewhere else. Please. Sheesh! What is with these people who don't know how to JUST HAVE FUN!!!!!??? 
3 people like this
@royal52gens (5488)
• United States
24 Feb 09
Honey, we all know you. By avatar or by name or by the way you write. We know you. You are not lost. You walk among friends.
2 people like this
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
23 Feb 09
Hi sparky,
Here, here to auntie sparky, take note, our sparky is a lady of wisdom and humour, she don't mince her words, she tell it as it is whether you like it or not but listen up and you will learn. Thaks spark, I couldn't have put it better. Love and hugs.
Tamara
xxxx
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
24 Feb 09
You're welcome and thank you for the kind words. I love you too! Higgles.......
@wonttakelong (3555)
• United States
23 Feb 09
and I am glad that I havent been on here much lately
I see some things never change LOL
respect runs both ways
we all need to respect one another but above that we all need to respect the rules
no matter how ridiculous they seem sometimes LOL
3 people like this
