Make up or Break up - When is it time to call it quits?

I would say that yuou have to give more weight on the last sentence you wrote because it all matters no matter what. Examine yourself honestly and evaluate your feelings towards her. If you find out that you love her less and constant fights is not a helathy sign of togetherness and if you can no longer take the stress due to your disagreements then you should give it a serious thought. One thing is that you should take care of your health.

This is not a relationship worth saving. If you are not really in love with her, why are you still in the relationship? I would say it's time to move on and find someone more compatible with you. A relationship that is really for you won't harm you healthwise, or interfere with your sleep. Ignore it now and watch it get steadily worse.

After being in 3 marriages and one 4 year relationship, 3 with children from previous marriages, if she has always taken her daughter's side against you, guess what.....it's not going to change. Been there done that got that t-shirt. Only difference in my case, it was sons in two of my marriages and a daughter in the last relationship. Which, the children and/or displine of them was not the reason for my divorces or my recent break-up. However, I let it be known early on, that what was good for my girls was good for their child, if they had not respected that, it would have been over before it started. I think you need to look hard and deep to the answer to your last statement........do you still love her? If not, then you know your answer. But, if that is the route you take, don't just up and leave, tell her the 'why' for it. Life is too short to be unhappy all the time! Good luck

If you are stressed out, take a break. Don't decide when you're angry or depressed. Get away for a few days, and think about you and her. I know it's frustrating if you're trying to help out someone and they don't listen to you, but I guess she has her reasons too, right? So, before calling it quits, because all I you mentioned is that it's all about the daughter, and not really your relationship with your girlfriend, then just take it easy, get away for a while, and try to see if you do miss your girlfriend. If not, then perhaps it's time to pack your bags. After all, why let yourself be stressed out when you have the ability and the freedom to go? Good luck!

I would suggest to take a timeout for yourself. Take a little break from each other, take a break from the arguments and stuff.. and when you are calm and she is calm too, have a proper discussion about this matter. Do not have a discussion when you are feeling angry, or defensive, because it will just ended up in another arguments or fight and will not solve the problems. Find out and hear out what she has to say about her choice of parenting ways, why does she think it is better to let a child do whatever she chooses to do ? Could it be thats how she was raised by her own parents? Or could it be the opposite that your gf was raised in a strict household and in turns wants her daughter to have as much freedom as possible? A child needs her parents, they needed guidance from their parents. 16 yo teenage girl do has the ability to make their own decision BUT that doesnt mean that they are able to make the BEST decision yet, and therefore still need their parents guidance to shape them up to be a mature and wise woman.. And as for your last statement : "Im not really sure if I still love her" .. I dont think its the point. You may not feel loving her at this moment because of all the arguments, but that doesnt always means that you dont still love her.

I understand that it's difficult with kids but, did you ever sit down and just talk to the 16 yr old? This is a very emotional time for them. They are experiencing changes that you might not understand being a man. This is when they need you most. Over time it will pay off once they have matured and become responsible they will see and understand what youve done or are trying to do for them. As far as you not loving the woman thats a different issue all together and you cant blame the kid for that. Communication is the key! So get talking so you can resolve the issues or make a decision whether to stay together or not. Take Care!

it's tough to develop a relationship, especially when there is a child involved. If you aren't sure you still love your girlfriend, I think that is the thing you should be thinking about. Because if you don't love her, then there isn't much point in trying to save the relationship. On the other hand, if you do try, would she be trying too? Would you two be able to compromise on somethings?

I think you should call it quits. 16 is too far gone down the road for your interference…and yes, like it or not, in all probability your good meaning gestures are more often than not, interpreted as interfering in a strong mother-daughter relationship. And of course, this teenager (as more teenagers are wont to) is just glad to either rebel or put on innocent airs and put the onus of it on you so that her doting mom does not see the difference. Its not worth the effort really…no respect, no love, acceptance as a parent…you would be better off with your sanity.

I think first off you have to decide if its worth staying in this relationship. I am a firm believer that the mother has the right to raise that child the way she wants after all she is the mother. You can suggest what you would do but however you cant make her change her parenting skills. I know that shounds harsh from me and Im not trying to be insensitive but there is a reason. Im a mom to four children one nearly 15 and my past marriage their step dad (of oldest two)constantly told me how to raise them;had he approched me and said "I think what your allowing to happen is a detriment" I may have pulled back and listened. Or if we would have agreed from very begining that he was going to be a active role in their life as role model and parent and disciplanrian (spelled wrong) then i would have respinded better. however the constant nagging of your letting them by with too much your not being responsible mother drove me to leave. The stress of having to chose between my daughters and him was too much. Good luck in your situation you may want to suggest parenting classes or therapy for the both of you if you feel its worth saving.

If you are not happy with your relationship, why stick on it? You are here to live happy. the stress that you are going through can only be resolved by you. Act now, decide now and be happy soon. I also don't get the point of what keeping you with the relationship if you are not happy anymore with your girlfriend. But please, don't just leave. have a heart to heart first with your girlfriend and let her know how you feel and what are your options. Let her know what and how you feel. Don't be afraid to tell her the truth, it will certainly hurt her (truth hurts) but it will eventually set you free. Good luck and God bless.

you know what lordkhomar, better you to talk to her in one place that only the two of you.. then tell her everything you want to tell her.. good and bad. if still she wont listen thats the time you will say, you cant live it anymore and your tired of those stuff.. communication is very important in a relationship

you have to think again if you really love her. and if you don't love anymore, then go and pack up your things. There's a lot of women out there who will love you more and listen to you. Don't push your self to be with somebody who will never listen to you. your relationship may worsen if she will not realize that her daughter is doing wrong.

As long as you love each other. You can make up.

hmmm..i can sympathize with u and really know the way u must be feeling,but this relationship without any future planning is cause u more distress.it is best u have a face to face disscussion and sort the issue at the earliest.if a solution is possible goob but if doesnot lead to any conclussion it its best u opt out for ur sake. -BEST WISHES

Do not abruptly break up, plan a small vacation for yourself and then assess yourself whether you are happy without them or you need them in your life and then only do whatever your heart tells you to do. It is better to take decisions by first detaching yourself from the place of conflict.

It is very, very difficult blending families. I know...I've tried. I am a single mom and I do know that I do not like a boyfriend interfering with my parenting. He may not agree but he is NOT the parent. Everyone has different parenting styles and just because hers does not match your own it doesn't mean she is wrong. We know our kids...we know what they have been thru prior to you entering the family. I won't have a man live with me anymore for the reasons that you give in your post. It is just too tiring on the relationship. I vowed to my girls 10 years ago that no man would ever again step in and change up our way of doing things. I kept that promise. Not saying that your parenting techniques are wrong ....it is confusing to the kids when a new person enters and wants to do things all different than what they are used to....causes so many problems. My ex and I moved in together and both of us had kids. I did NOT expect him to take over their dad's role any more than I felt I had a right to take over their mother's role. When I was not there, if my kids were disrespectful or disobeyed then do what a sitter would do ....give them a time out and inform me of the problem. My ex would distract me from dealing with the problem. If I wasn't there, he'd yell and set punishments before I even knew what the problem was. My kids were not even open to listening to me at that point...they'd been yelled at enough. I felt put in the middle. Sometimes (often times) his punishments were harsher than what I would have doled out for the crime. I never let them know that I didn't agree out of respect for the relationship....I did let him know in privacy. He also put me down as a parent. It drove us apart. I left. I raised my kids on my own and they are all well adjusted fine young people. He even admits that I did a good job...one of those kids is "ours". You say that you aren't sure that you love her. Think long and hard on that one before you leave. Teen years are tough for parents. I think right now your girlfriend is needing your support of her rather than "help" in parenting.

The tension you are going through is only going to get worse, if your girlfriend does not or will not see your point. Her daughter will begin doing more things that will annoy you, because she knows that her mother has her back. Since you have doubts about whether you still love your girlfriend or not, I would suggest you leave the situation. No one seems to be concerned about the stress you are going through, and if this relationship is not going anywhere you need to leave. Maybe, when you are gone, your girlfriend will realize what a mistake she made.

If you're feeling stressed then i guess you need to take a break.. don't make a decision when you're feeling irritated and stressed.. sometimes, we need to think things over for a thousand of times to avoid future hassles, regrets and other things.. for now, just take a deep breath. once you're ready then talk to your girlfriend about your concerns.. quitting will never resolved your problems! good luck

I've heard an old saying one time... "Distance clears the heart" So distances yourself from her, see how your doing with out the fighting, the stress, the constant battles about her child, and if your better with out having them around then I think you answered your own question. Constant fighting is no way to live a life, it only takes you down and makes you very unhappy. Getting away and giving yourself some time to soul search would probably help alot, making a rash or harsh decision, would probably cause even more conflict. Maybe with you gone for a few days she will realize how much of a good impact you are having on this child's life, open her eyes and make things work, but if she doesn't, then their again, your question has been answered. Alot of times people don't wanna see what they have, and don't wanna open their eyes wide enough to see that what is being said to them is for the best, because honestly the truth hurts.

oh thats really a wrong attitude your girlfriend is having towards her daughter and that too on such a age of 16 on which her daughter can easily make to understand the situation. i didnt mean to say that it is always the girl should understand but yes in some situation you also have to be a calm person. so that you three together can make a good bond of love. but i must say that your girlfriend should change her attitude what she should do is make her daughter understand something with love not with too much of love. it is a common saying that excess of everything is bad whether it is love or its hate. so everything should be in a balaced way. and if your girlfriend needs your cooperation you should always be there for her.i think in this way you three can live a better life.