you're fat!!!

To be honest, I have only heard that said here by older people. Younger people only say that behind your back. Im beginning to wonder which is worse!.. I think its extremely rude...I would never say that to someone. Weight is a touchy enough subject and not one we wanted to be reminded of, unless we lost weight!!

It's a very intersting thing, but in china, maybe it's a good thing someone say that to you. Yon know the customs is different all over the word, maybe it's rude for filipino, but for chinese people, it's not a bad thing, haha...

well i think if it's accepted in your place then it should be okay. but most of the time, talking about weight gain is painful. i wouldn't like it if someone told me i'm fat or that i gained weight. i appreciate the honestly, if it's on a daily basis then i'd be pissed.

Hi sandragellar, I am from the UK and we don't greet each other like that and its fastest way to lose a friend if you say that to them, but its ok to say they l9ost weight as the is a complement, but don't normally go on about weights. Tamara

it is the same in England it is so rude,everyone is obsessed with weight,someone told me I had gained weight the other day,mind you I have lived here for twentyfive years and was always a bean pole not anymore.They used to say arn't you thin so things have not changed really.Some people used to hate me because I was so thin now they are getting their own back as they see it.I personally never worried about how much someone weighs I have a life.Just say yea and walk away.The tv is full of slimming adverts,schools are full of healthy eating experts to stop all this obesity from killing everybody off to early,and draining the health service resources.Yes we do need a crash oourse in manners and tact.Well some do anyway.

I know what you mean! Im filipino... its either we say hey you've gained weight or hey you look thinnner ... its all about weight when we greet other people.

That seems to be an ongoing obsession of our current society in general. I never partook in such rude behavior, and luckily I none of the people I know ever did either. Occasionally I'll hear people ask each other if they lost weight but it's usually just their way of saying "You look great," and isn't meant to be taken as anything other than that. Sometimes, the people I know may see a recent photo of someone and comment about their weight (for better or for worse), but they would never make those comments when the person they're speaking of is there or could find out what they said. I personally hate weight talk whether it's about being fat or being skinny or anything in between. I think if the person/people look happy with themselves as they are, then it's best to just let them be. Besides, so many people are sensitive about their body image and I am not one to want to make any insecurities they may have worse... I usually go by the old adage, "If you can't say something nice, don't say nothin' at all..."

LOL....this is also the norm here in my country. When I meet a long time friend which I haven't seen for ages, the first thing that comes out of her mouth is 'How come you're so fat now?' as if there is nothing much better to say. Sometimes I feel insulted when friends great me like that. I will make them swallow their words by replying in a sarcastic way 'don't you know this is a sign of prosperity'. I have nothing more to add and they will be taken back with my reply. then they start asking me what business I am doing blah...blah....it shows they are convinced that I am living an affluent life.

yes i am a filipino. and then yes i am fat. i do usually get a lot of notice now because of my weight gain. which i never get before. cause when i am in normal weight they will not notice any thing about me. but now i am fat it is different story. so i am trying some how to get back to normal or lean figure i have before cause i think that is the healthy kind of body. i am trying to ct back now from fast and meats and any thing that has oil and less of carbohydrates. i got used to now when people say i am fat. i can't blame them cause i am so fat right now. i hate hit actually. i will want to bring back my old self.

I would have stomp on their foot and say "Opps I'm so fat I didn't see that there. I hope my heavy self didn't hurt you" I know there are a lot of folks who have forgotten their manners. In all kinds of ways. I'm more of a "wow, it's great to see you here" kinda gal.

I suppose some people may find this "motivating", if they are in a weight loss group together. I wouldn't find it motivating myself. My weight is my own issue, and I would find it offensive for someone to keep commenting on it. If this was just occuring out of no where, as we were not in a weight loss group together, then I'd report it to my HR and ask that it stop. Of course, I also feel people in America are too preoccupied with negative body types and that it is not healthy. Namaste-Anora

i think you would really need to know the person to say something like that as it can be hyper sensitive. I was at party wher a couple of guys had not seen each in awhile and one said this to the other. The other guy luaghed and said he gotten married and his wife was a great cook. I did think it was rude but they both laughed it off

I just know that you are right that there should be a long course of etiquette. Also happened to me, with people I do not see a bit of time, the meeting place for street-by-case basis and the only thing I know is to ask "but you've taken weight?", this shows a great rudeness!.

i have experienced so many times... it depends... sometimes people would say, i gained weight, others may say you've lost too much.. its so exhausting , its like you have to defend yourself why did you lost or gained weight..some would say this in front of other people too loud that others would start staring at you.. i mean i dont really care much about my look as long as im healthy....

I wouldn't mind if they would tell me something like that. I became conscious of myself and I started to lose weight two years ago because I didn't know that I gained 10kilos on my weight.

yeah, i agree with you my friend..i was able to experience that before when i gained weight..everytime i meet a friend in the mall or just bump someone i know they will immediately say "omg! you're so fat!" of course i feel disappointed but then it became a challenge for me to workout on my weight and luckily i am able to loose weight..now, i still can hear people saying the same thing but this time not to me but to other individual..and that's so sad..

well., the world is always unfair. although if certain do say a certain person to be fat or something, take it that im a fat guy, i will use their rude comments to become my motivation in getting myself slim down. yes maybe hard for some people to take thw harsh comments by others but sometimes these people just do not care for other's feelings