I can't decide if i was wrong to do this or not...
By saundyl
@saundyl (9783)
Canada
March 23, 2009 1:49pm CST
On friday I blocked my friend on msn.
I turn my msn on at work so i can message the other girl in the office while shes on the phone with questions regarding customers or prices.
The reason behind blocking my friend is she decides to message me AS soon as my msn so much as signs on - even if I'm not there or I'm busy (with my status set to busy or "a message saying I'm at work I wont answer")
Then if i dont answer she leaves me messages asking why I'm ignoring her and why wont i answer. It's been driving me wacko. Then if i do respond to her in the evening when I'm not working she won't bother to answer me. I've called a few times and she hasnt answered the phone either. I left her a message saying during the week from 8:30-5:00 I can't chat because I'm at work I'd talk to her when i was at home. She ignored that.
I'm just tired of all the messages hi and asking why I'm ignoring her. So i blocked her.
Was i wrong to block her?
8 people like this
22 responses
@sysdexlicwriter (1619)
• United States
23 Mar 09
There must be something in the water or something. I have noticed that of late I have seen my friends and others' friends do the same thing. Is everyone out there so selfish that they can not grant a simple wish to a friend. Okay, I had my rant! I had a friend that I would ask not to call me at night. Guess when she would call? I do not understand it, but you were absolutely right in blocking her. It's not as if you asked her to do something that is beyond any human being's ability to do. If she can't do something simple like this, what's next?
2 people like this
@saundyl (9783)
• Canada
24 Mar 09
Honestly this isnt the first time she's done things like this. A couple a years ago i actually told her i couldnt be the kind of friend she expected me to bed (that being the kind that she could stand up and leave hanging 9 our of 10 times and expect my feelings not to be hurt but then get mad when i dont wait around for her because shes stood me up so often)
@sysdexlicwriter (1619)
• United States
24 Mar 09
I have learned that if a friendship is not a give/give relationship, then it is a give/take, take, take. After a while the giver is sapped out and the taker is smiling from ear to ear, clueless.
1 person likes this
@saundyl (9783)
• Canada
24 Mar 09
I tried asking her not to explained why she kept on. It wasnt a first resort it was a last resort. I know it was suggested i create a 2nd email for using for msn at work but I have enough clients addresses on this one that (i dont use them often) request help via remote assistance i dont want to have to change them all over. Most of the time i use the msn just to message my co-worker re stock or pricing questions while shes listening to someone on the phone. Or to pass a message on to my boss. MSN's dont get lost as easily as sticky notes.
I have friends on the msn however i never talk to them while at work. I wish msn was like yahoo and you could appear offline to just a certain group or certain people.
@Andi2004 (19)
• United States
23 Mar 09
i dont see anything wrong with blocking her from your msn. if she cnat take the hint that your working and cant talk then she should get a life. i have friends who do that all the time i end up just not going on msn or anything mostly couse i get my ex messaging me. but she should understand and grow up.
2 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
23 Mar 09
If she isn't getting the reason why your on your msn at work is WORK RELATED, then I think it was okay to block her. You could get fired for chatting about anything but work, could you not? Your friend might be sore at you for awhile but I think she'll come around, some people are really needy, I know I am. I'd probably do the same in her shoes, but I'd also know that you were at work and could get fired.
Lol.
Well you could always resolve it by getting a different im name for work, only for work.
2 people like this
@cream97 (29086)
• United States
23 Mar 09
Hi, saunndyl! I don't think that you was really wrong in blocking her on msn. I can understand that you was at work and you needed time to work. The only time that she should have tried to message you is if there is an emergency. That is all. But, she should let you work and respect that you have a job to do and you just can't be disturbed like that. She should try to call you when she knows it is your break time. I don't really think that you were wrong to block her from msming you as she did. It may seem mean, but she left you with no choice. She should have just answered the phone when you called her back..
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29086)
• United States
24 Mar 09
I guess she feels that since she no longer has a job that it is oaky for her to just call whenever she sees fit. She has to understand that, even if she is working or not that still does not give her the right to disturb someone else who has a job. You could get into trouble for answering all her messgages. Is she concerned about not getting you into trouble?
1 person likes this
@jesssp (2712)
• Canada
23 Mar 09
I haven't been on MSN in forever but I think there used to be an 'appear offline' function. Is that still there? It made it so you could see who was online and converse with them but no one would see your name under 'online'. But really it's the same result, I don't think there's anything wrong with blocking her. Some people just cannot understand/accept simple little things like 'I can't talk, I'm at work' if their feelings have aleady been hurt. But I wouldn't let it bother you. I would say send her an email explaining it again if you want to but if that doesn't clarify then it seems like it's a lost cause!
2 people like this
@saundyl (9783)
• Canada
24 Mar 09
Asking her to not do things just seems to cause her to do it more. My cell phone charges me per message i recieve via text..i asked her not to send me forwards so she sent me more (it was costing me over 3 dollars a DAY just to get texts from her alone!) I ended up changing my cell number and just giving it to my parents and boss and the one friend who is deaf so we cant talk on the phone we text.
@GardenGerty (160949)
• United States
24 Mar 09
No, you are not wrong. I have had "friends" who will not respect my boundaries in the past. That is just not friendly. You have your msn on for a reason, so stick to that reason. You need to keep your job. You are using it as a tool. She is a bully, in a way.
1 person likes this
@LittleMel (8742)
• Canada
24 Mar 09
no I don't see anything wrong with that
it's not about chatting at work because some work places allow that as long as it doesn't interrupt your work
but she seems like a selfish person
I mean you did tell her you are at work, and you did call or leave message a few times to explain
I don't know if you have ever done the same to her, but from what you wrote I think I would do the same if I were you
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
24 Mar 09
the fact that you blocked her and asked if you were right tells me that she is not really much of a close friend anyway. Actually the whole story tells me that. I would not dream of bugging my friend at work and my friend would not be bugging me either. she actually sounds more like one of those annoying aquaintainces ...you know the type,,,they are kind of fun to hang with but only when your in the mood. they are nice BUT,,, Fun, BUT,,,. 1 person likes this
@Yori88 (1465)
• Philippines
25 Mar 09
You are not wrong for blocking your friend in msn. I think she misinterpreted the reason why you did block her. Maybe she thought you don't want to receive any more messages from here and maybe she was hurt by that. Worst case is she could have taken what you did as an insult. I understand that sometimes we need to be free from disturbances especially when we are work so I will do the same if I were in your position. Anyway if you are trying to contact here but to no success you just have to let that way until she realizes her mistake. After some time you two will be okay after talking what you both want to happen.
@strawberrychocodahi (4818)
• Philippines
24 Mar 09
Hello Saundyl, she probably did not understand you well when you say you are at work, yet you were online. Probably she is doing the same thing at work, working and online chatting.
Anyway i hope you two can meet and talk, that is the best so that she will not be angry at you on why you have blocked her, which for her, it means she had done you wrong and you are ignoring her even if you say you were working.
Sometimes, we need to listen first on what others have to say and when we have the opportunity to speak, then make the most out of it and explain well. Hope you and your friend would patch things back again. Happy Mylotting!
@Berryvegas81 (66)
• United States
24 Mar 09
I don't think you were wronge to block her. Reguardless of wether you would get in trouble or not, if you don't want to be bothered while your at work is completely understandable. One would hope she would respect that as your friend but it may take awhile for her to understand. I agree with the other posted to maybe create a separte at work only log in so then you don't have to feel guilty about blocking her and don't have to if it is bothering you that much. Just my 2 pennies.
1 person likes this
@Archie0 (5652)
•
24 Mar 09
Hmmm this is a sarcastic behaviour she is carrying..dont worry, you might be feeling a bit guilty of what you did or a bit bad, thats why you worryingly put the question here.its like if you think she is getting too much on your nevers then its ok, well there are some people like this way, and they hardly can hange though, if yu think what you did, then i will say it is right accrding to your decision.But if you feel sorry for her explain her this everything.and end the matter in a good notes.i think this wil be better if you clear them you wont be feeling as if you did wrong, you have rights to choose where you want to be comfortable at some point of place in your life, no everyone can scratch and eat us.
@saundyl (9783)
• Canada
24 Mar 09
More a last resort after requests for her not to message me during work hours. Also had to change my cell number because she was texting me forwards all the time and the texts were adding up to 90 dollars a month and she didnt listen when i asked her NOT to send me them.
@lloydbelleza (1227)
• Philippines
24 Mar 09
I sometimes do that to my friends who in a way bother me when I am working into something. I don't think it is a bad thing that you've blocked your friend given the reason you stated above. I think it is best for you and for her because during those times that you're busy, she can't get good responses from you and you are being bothered, so better block her "TEMPORARILY". :)
If she doesn't get your point, I think it's already her fault. Just explain to her your side. I get your point really. You are not doing a bad thing or becoming a bad friend in any angles.
1 person likes this
@PrarieStyle (2486)
• United States
24 Mar 09
I think you did the right thing. She should have known enough not to bother you while you're at work without you even having to tell her. If she doesn't understand and can't get over it, well then I guess she wasn't your friend in the first place.
1 person likes this
@Ysabel (1201)
• Philippines
24 Mar 09
No, i don't think its wrong to block her. If she's been a nuisance and you have attempted or several attempts to reach out to her and she's ignoring you, then they must be something underlying. If you two bumped into each other, then explain to her about your not being comfortable chatting during office hours - and that's it. you have already done your part.
@neha2k94u (406)
• India
24 Mar 09
Well if she is irritating you then a better thing is that you block her and whenever you want to talk give her a call...
And keep in touch...
I think she'll be happy...
1 person likes this
@swaroopmsc (241)
• India
24 Mar 09
No you are not wrong. Doing the same thing is correct. Someday she will realise the truth.
1 person likes this
