Restraining Orders - is it too late to get one?

Tweet

I'd like to post this as a more generalized topic, rather than a very personal one, and any comments, resources, and experiences are welcome. A year ago, Jane was involved in an abusive relationship with Matt. At first it was emotional abuse. After four months, Matt finally laid a hand on Jane. Not only physically assaulting her that night, but threatening her and saying he was going to kill her. Jane left him immediately. The cops had been called twice that night but Jane did not press charges, she just wanted to leave Matt's life as quickly as possible, not wanting to see him in court or in person every again. This was a mistake. After that night, Matt kept calling her phone, apologizing and asking for a second chance. Jane made it very clear that there is no second chance for a man who would lay a hand on her or want to hurt her. Matt continued the calls anyway, always in hope Jane would change her mind. He'd continue to call, text, e-mail, have friends watch her, and read her mail (they lived together). The message was always expressed the same. He apologizes, he expresses his love for Jane still, he wants to meet her again in person, and that this was his final goodbye to her. The messages would come about every 2-3 months, and Jane always ignored the messages believing it was "the final goodbye." She thought if she ignored him, he'd eventually leave her alone. A year after the break up, Matt finds her online and sends her another message. He said he works less than a block away from Jane, and looks for her everyday. Jane had had enough of this and now she's scared to be at work. She replied to Matt to leave her alone. She then saw he had a girlfriend, and contacted the girlfriend and told her that Matt had been harassing her for the past year and she wants him to stop, and she has been afraid of Matt. The next day, Matt's girlfriend leaves him. Jane blocks Matt in every way she can, now hoping that action will be a better resolve. Matt had sent one last e-mail in, expressing a lot of anger. He once more claimed, "this is my final goodbye." But Matt still knows where Jane works, and Jane is still convinced that he looks for her (now more than ever.) She always felt he wanted to meet her in person to finish what he started the night he hurt her. Every day she lives in fear, wondering if she'll run into him. So - the grand question. When is it too late to get a restraining order? Some resources state that restraining orders are only provided upon "immediate threat of danger." In Jane's case, she cannot provide evidence that she is in immediate danger. Matt never threatened to harm her in his messages. Jane took all of his messages as threats because of what he did to her, and what she believes he will do to her. Yet, should people live in fear? No. There are obviously loop holes in the justice system. How about some good loop holes? Share anything constructive that you can.