Have you ever encounter a rude person here on Mylot?
By desireeo
@desireeo (595)
Philippines
March 26, 2009 7:57am CST
Mylot is a varied and huge community. Members come from different side of the world and due to the differences in culture and the nature of man to have different opinions, it can't be avoided that there will be skirmishes within discussions. So, how do your react to people with different opinion than you do? I have asked this question because I have read several discussions (some I've participated in while I was just an observer in others) that have fuelled fights. I have not been directly involved although I understand when a fire is started. I know how it is to feel strongly about something.
The other day, I came across this discussion that was started by a fellow Filipino. I was compelled to comment but I chose not to because I was mentally exhausted. There was a response which was a little bit misguided. In my opinion, a calm reprimand would have done the trick but the initiator reacted a little bit harshly. Well, I was not in his position to know how it feels to receive a response that slightly accuses you of something. Something that is not politically right. But, I thought, no harm would have been done if the initiator had straighten out the misguided member in a calmer voice. Instead, he lashes out and that ired the respondent. And so the short story was made long.
Both of them are to blame but to me there's nothing that can't be resolved in a calm explanation. Unless, you're being provoked purposely. I count myself lucky for not bumping into any rude member. If I had, I would either ignore him or retort back since nobody has the right to treat you badly. It would be helpful to remember that discussions are open for all members to respond to and if there are differences it is better to respect other people's opinion or state your side calmly. Any harsh reaction would also get the same kind of reaction. Let's keep the air here friendly. Although, these are isolated incidents and there's no cause to be alarmed, I'm just wondering how many of you have experienced nasty discussions.
7 people like this
32 responses
@bubbletush (1332)
• Philippines
26 Mar 09
So far I haven't met someone who is rude in myLot. I know there is a big possibility because myLotters are from different places with different cultures, beliefs and opinions. I just hope that every body should be open-minded and level-headed.
5 people like this
@lologirl2021 (5542)
• United States
26 Mar 09
I have encountered a rude person before here on mylot. I really couldnt believe she was saying what she was saying. I will not mention any names because this person is very active here on the mylot community. I had started a discussion and she was the only one who responded so i wrote back to her explaining what was really gong on and her response was so rude. I hope you havent had that like i have enjoy mylotting
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
26 Mar 09
It's prudent of you not to mention names to avoid any conflicts. hehe. I certainly don't want to start now. Anyways, as long as you're earning your cents then let that person be. He or she can steam by herself but let's not be a part of it. It will only add wrinkles to our face...Enjoy Mylot!
2 people like this
@bluemars (952)
• Australia
26 Mar 09
I have not really encountered someone really rude here. To be honest most people I have encountered have been really nice to say the least. It is one of the reasons why I keep coming back here. The community here is pretty good. There are some people that are over the top about certain things but as long as they do it in good fun I don't mind. After all we are all entitled to our opinion.
2 people like this
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
Yes, there is nothing wrong with harmless banter. This is nothing personal, although we share personal experiences, because in essence we're strangers to each other and you can't expect people to share your likes and dislikes. It can't hurt to have fun here. We get to state our opinion and get paid for it. What more can we ask?
1 person likes this
@bamakelly (5191)
• United States
26 Mar 09
I have been a member of myLot for a little while now and have never really experienced any nasty discussions from my end of it. That's to say that I never initiated a post or responded to a discussion in which I incurred the wrath or ire of another person.
I have however come across some discussions that I either participated in or maybe didn't that happened to be quite heated. There are some controversial subjects out there that seem to encourage, for lack of a better word, some animosity from other respondents.
And sometimes like you have stated in your post today, have turned something short into something pretty long winded.
I usually try to stay away from some of those anger provoking discussions.
I do have to admit that some of the heated discussions can be quite interesting it is just that I don't want to take serious part in all of them.
3 people like this
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
26 Mar 09
Yes, they can be quite interesting but if the initiator isn't prepared to take the other side of the argument then what's the point in discussing? Discussions are meant to encourage different opinions. Mylot certainly didn't want uniformed thoughts. Variation is what they're looking for. Besides, there's enough animosity going on in the real world...Good luck to us all!
1 person likes this
@jambi462 (4576)
• United States
26 Mar 09
Yeah I have discovered a couple of rude people here on mylot they were just kind of close minded and shot down what I was talking about or my ideas as soon as they read what I had said. It seems like a lot of people pre-judge before they really think about what the topic is or something like that. That's okay because it's their loss not mine. Besides who are they to judge what's right or wrong they're human just like me and we both breath the same air don't we?
4 people like this
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
26 Mar 09
For topics that differ with your beliefs and ideals, it is best to think hard about what you're going to say. You can differ politely and if other people react irrationally then it's already their problem. We're not here to judge. On the contrary, Mylot is a good avenue to interact with people and learn from them...
1 person likes this
@ajithlal (14716)
• India
26 Mar 09
I have not found any rude person in myLot. I really hope that I don't find any rude person here. I am sorry that you have found a rude person in myLot. I think one of the thing you should do is put a negative sign if the person was very rude to reply on your discussion. I think it is very bad for a person to treat others in a rude manner.
1 person likes this
@kalav56 (11464)
• India
27 Mar 09
Thank God I haev not experienced any nasty discussion so far, desireeo;
I normally stay away from controversial topics.Twice, I got a rude reply that was totally uncalled for and I did not want to prolong it further.I just did not respond to another person's rude comment.In one discussion,someone else spoke on behalf of the fact stated in the discussion, and then there was some mild argument and it stopped.Why get into controversy over somehting with some people whom we have not even seen?This forum is here to make friends and I am very fortunate to get wonderful friends.We just have some discussions where there is plain sharing of ideas wth no acrimony whatsoever.That is how I prefer it.
1 person likes this
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
Yes, I totally agree with you. We should not get carried away and let us not lose our temper because we don't even know these people. It is much better to spend our time online productively. Yes, it can't be avoided that tempers are going to flare especially when you're having a bad day and you're caught in some controversial discussions. It would help us to remember that we're at the losing end if we let our tempers get the better of us. This is meant to be an open forum and that means all members in all shapes,colors and sizes are bound to respond so you'd better be prepared and just have fun with it.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
For two times I encountered rude people who just butted in my response to discussion. I answered in good faith and in polite way in those discussions and was really offended when someone contradicted rudely and even used dirty words and accusations on my person. Then what is more annoying was 2 other more dirty folks joined and they altogether tried to pin me down. But of course I was in a fighting mood and would not take the matter sitting down. I exchanged hot words with them by I never went down to their level. While my words are strong and bold I never went to the extent of uttering bad words as they all did which reflected all the more their dirty personalities. There are indeed trolls around and they are busy looking for someone they could piss off. Imagine, if my opinion differ from them, I don't think it is not their business anymore. In the first place this is an open discussion and each opinion should be respected. Considering the fact that they were not even the one who opened the discussion, I think it is too rude of them to add a thread on my response just to malign me and contradict each of my words in a very dirty. And then later when they are already running out of words to say, they are turning the table upside down by making it appear that I was the one who started all the mess. Ha!ha!ha! How stupid the trolls here could be!
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
Obscene language is strictly prohibited here. Have you reported them to Mylot? If you have then Mylot will take appropriate action. People who come in here to cause trouble has no place in Mylot. Most members of this community are very cooperative and are peacefully interacting with one another. I think, it's better not to let them get into our nerves because they're just taking us for a ride and they're having the time of their lives wreaking havoc.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
Oh my dear they can do away with dirty words for they are inserting symbols in place of the letters. Aside from the dirty words they also put so many dirty insinuations about my personality when they do not even know me. Well, of course, I know myself better so I was not a bit disturbed but would want to give them a lesson so I engaged in a very tough cyber fight. At least I've shown them they could not do away just like that.
@saichandtalluri (1486)
• India
27 Mar 09
No i did not find any kind of person which you specified. I think i must be lucky because till now in my mylot journey i am happy with all the mylotters and i faced no problem with anyone. I even was not rude to anyone and i don't like to be so. If i don't like any discussion or topic i just leave that page and look for what i am interested.
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
28 Mar 09
Hahaha! That's all right, King Julian. You seem to be having the time of your life posting here on Mylot. You said you still log in here even if you're at work, well, I hope, your boss will not catch you. I am giving your permission to gate crash in all of my discussions...
You're doing nothing wrong and you really amuse me. Hehehe. You'll definitely overtake my earnings in no time (if you haven't already) even if my number of posts is higher than yours. Keep posting!
You're doing nothing wrong and you really amuse me. Hehehe. You'll definitely overtake my earnings in no time (if you haven't already) even if my number of posts is higher than yours. Keep posting!@saichandtalluri (1486)
• India
28 Mar 09
Hope i got two good friends form this discussion i really thank the person who created this discussion.
@strawberrychocodahi (4818)
• Philippines
26 Mar 09
Hello Desireeo, im on the same bout like you when i commented on some discussion here on Mylot, and to my surprise, this person was really having a problem on my post, and not the host of the forum to which i participated.
If i am sure, this person is also a fellow Filipino, I'm just curious who this person you are talking about, can you PM me his id, i already added you on my list of friends. Anyway i can really relate to what you have experience.
The sad thing was, after replying to this person about what he reacted on my own personal point of view, my rate star decreased, i am sure he really pressed that negative button for me although that would not stop me from continuing my post on Mylo as long as i earn here and have friends, i will not mind him, but for sure, i will never respond to any discussion he will post here, hahahah!
1 person likes this
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
You're a Filipino, too? Glad to meet you and thanks for adding me. Anyways, I think this person is pretty controversial. I have already come across him twice and both times I've seen him engaged in heated discussion. I don't know. Maybe, he just wants to provoke strong reactions. He's quite opinionated. Maybe, he likes to differ just for the sake of argument. Perhaps you can tell me which discussion that is you participated in? So, I can see if we're talking about the same person?
No, this is nothing personal. I'm just curious. I also noticed this person's star is decreasing. Oh yeah, he has made some people unhappy. Well, that's just him. My star rating used to be 10 but it seems I have also made some people unhappy. Though, for the life of me I don't know what I did. Oh, well. Each to his own.
So, yeah. Tell me which discussion and I'll take a look at it first, okay?
No, this is nothing personal. I'm just curious. I also noticed this person's star is decreasing. Oh yeah, he has made some people unhappy. Well, that's just him. My star rating used to be 10 but it seems I have also made some people unhappy. Though, for the life of me I don't know what I did. Oh, well. Each to his own.
So, yeah. Tell me which discussion and I'll take a look at it first, okay?
@taki_takaishi (1279)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
So far, I haven't. This is a free expression place. Honesty is really needed here, so I guess that person is being honest. I don't know, but since it is rude, you should report it so that that person will be penalized.
1 person likes this
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
I think, there's a huge difference between honesty and rudeness. You can be honest without being rude. Anyways, I haven't encounter anything yet that's worth reporting. The controversial people I've encountered only behaved childishly and they didn't do anything that might earn them a hit on the report button...
@makeupartisteileen (653)
• Singapore
26 Mar 09
yes i did, that time i posted' have you start saving yet'. and he just scold and answer in very rude way,and i just said if you think this is your privacy just don't answer .and i'm asking' how much you spend a month' not 'how much you earn a month 'get scolded for nothing
1 person likes this
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
As I've said there's culture differences and others are so sensitive about what they think is ethical or not. It can be applied here but we also have to think that we're different people. And if you think the person asking a question is crossing the line then you can say so without making it appear like you're raising your voice.
As for your discussion, I see nothing wrong with it. I'm sure a lot of members were willing to participate in it. The anonimity that the Internet gives us make us more open with others that we might not be able to do so in real life.
1 person likes this
@Aquilis (175)
•
27 Mar 09
Ive not been on here long, 4 days in fact and I experienced something today where someone seemed very angry at a comment I made....well it was not so much a comment but I questioned something that person had said......
Because of culture and being in different parts of the world words can mean different things and I asked a question I asked "What do you mean by you scold you cat?" And it seemed like the person got very angry by me asking :(
Where I come from a scolding means to be physically and verbally beaten and where my fiance is from it means to be burned by very hot water....
I just asked a question to make sure and she got very snappy with me she seemed so angry!..
I thought it would be best to ask rather then just assume that she hurts her cat!!!
It was rather upsetting and very rude...Im putting it down to culture difference and Im letting it go....I know full well I would apologize if I ended up hurting someone......
Good topic...feels good to get that off my chest
Thank you xxxx
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
Hahaha! That's odd. I think, it happens when you're using the same computer. Perhaps, you have to open a brand new page before you log in. That might work.
Anyways, i can't help but laugh at your response. So, you've been here 4 days and already your star rating is high. My, you're popluar...
So, what did she mean when she said she scold the cat? Hehehe. Yes, it's better to ask the host first before you react if there's something that confuses you. I don't know about the others but whenever members respond to my discussion I'm very happy with it and if someone wants to clarify something then I'd be happy to explain things to him. I mean, if you can't be bothered to explain and you get irritated by questions then you'll be a lonely person here. People will avoid you. So, your discussions will have no meaning since nobody is willing to participate.
I think your fiance's "scold" is "scald" in most parts of the world. I mean, the getting burned by very hot water thing? Langauge barrier is also one thing that might start a conflict. That's why it is very important that we listen to each other and not rush to judgement if we encounter any shocking posts. It might just be harmless. Just put in the way we're not used to....
So, what did she mean when she said she scold the cat? Hehehe. Yes, it's better to ask the host first before you react if there's something that confuses you. I don't know about the others but whenever members respond to my discussion I'm very happy with it and if someone wants to clarify something then I'd be happy to explain things to him. I mean, if you can't be bothered to explain and you get irritated by questions then you'll be a lonely person here. People will avoid you. So, your discussions will have no meaning since nobody is willing to participate.
I think your fiance's "scold" is "scald" in most parts of the world. I mean, the getting burned by very hot water thing? Langauge barrier is also one thing that might start a conflict. That's why it is very important that we listen to each other and not rush to judgement if we encounter any shocking posts. It might just be harmless. Just put in the way we're not used to....@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
Haha! I understand where you were coming from when you asked that lady. I mean, God only knows if she had indeed "scald" the poor cat... Anyways, there' really nothing that we can do with explosive people. Maybe, they have short temper in real life and it just reflects on here. Why do people get so offensive online? This is meant to be fun. Just imagine, having different kinds of people take interest in your discussion. Don't we want to take advantage of that? We can always learn something new here.
Anyways, there' really nothing that we can do with explosive people. Maybe, they have short temper in real life and it just reflects on here. Why do people get so offensive online? This is meant to be fun. Just imagine, having different kinds of people take interest in your discussion. Don't we want to take advantage of that? We can always learn something new here.
@balasri (26537)
• India
27 Mar 09
I have been here for the past three years.I have encountered one crude person and one rude person here.I just stay away from them.I just ignore them and forget that they are here.It is a waste of time trying to do anything better than ignoring them.People hardly change and it is not our work to change them too.
@dolce_vita78 (8062)
• Philippines
26 Dec 09
Hi desireeo!
I have been in myLot for a very long time already. More than three years that is. Within that period, it was only recently that I have encountered a very rude person. I think this person did not understand what was really being discussed and he started commenting on my discussion with baseless accusations. I do not know exactly what he was trying to imply. But I just had to keep my composure. It was my very first experience after being here for a very long time.
@chimrani (1426)
• India
26 Mar 09
i too encounter a rude female on mylot and i should not say her name but i think she don't know english at all.I wrote to give there feelings on the decision and she wrote that iam violating rules iam not posting good etc... etc...and the admin of the mylot deleted my discussion due to her.
YEs many of them wrote to me that iam true and not did any wrong and i think she gave nagative rating for me and i reached at 5 rate.Now iam well and rating many posts and comments and now i reached a 7 th rate
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
Again, I think it's ridiculous to react violently if the person responding to our posts differs from our own outlook. That's what discussions are for. To ask other members what they think about something and to encourage them to share their own experiences. Each of us is unique and it can only be expected that we have different thoughts on different things.
So sorry to have your post deleted. Although, I cannot say if it is indeed innocent and didn't violate any rules, I hope that Mylot reviews every post reported and not just delete randomly when somebody hits the report button. Now, you know the wiser so congrats on getting back your ratings...
@walijo2008 (4644)
• United States
26 Mar 09
Oh, I've read some nasty discussions on here a time or two, and I couldn't believe some of the responses that were made, some were just rude. Most of the time I stay out of it, I'm not on here to start fights with people, I'm here to learn more about different people and cultures, and learn new things.
@desireeo (595)
• Philippines
27 Mar 09
Yes, some people do get over the top with their response. I think, they feel safe in the fact that this is just a virtual interaction and that they feel like they can say anything, to the point of being rude. It is best to stay away from them and interact instead to interesting people that we can actually learn from. I guess, that's one of the benefits of Mylot so why not take advantage of it?
@walijo2008 (4644)
• United States
27 Mar 09
kingjulian..Its not all bad on here, you do meet some wonderful people, and learn interesting things. I try to stay away from topics that are controversial, like religion, and politics...etc. Those sort of topics tend to get heated sometimes, and you may find some angry people in there, so stay away from those. All other topics on here are good, and fun to get in on, like I said, you'll mostly find nice people on here, give it a chance...
@Shavkat (140102)
• Philippines
12 Nov 12
Personally, I don't like people who are so mean or rude. I can't imagine to dwell with that kind of environment. Either it will scarred my soul or feel ill looking at them. That's the reason, I pulled myself out for such people.
