Confused if my daughter might have autism...
By magrylouyu
@magrylouyu (1627)
United States
March 26, 2009 1:52pm CST
My youngest daughter will be 4 in May. People say I'm over reacting, but I believe she might have autism. She wakes up 4 or more times a night screaming for no reason. When I go in to comfort her she screams even more. She does not like to be around other people what so ever. If it's not myself, her daddy, brother, sister or grandparents she wants nothing at all to do with you. Preschool is coming to a close and the teachers tell me that she still sits by herself and does her own thing. She will not play with other children except her sister. Next year her sister will be in Kindergarden and will no longer be at the preschool. They say this might be her time to "blossom" next year. I am hoping she does. She also only knows maybe 4 or 5 letters of the Alphabet and I work with her constantly. She can reconize her name but has no clue as to what the 6 letters are. Her speech is also not the greatest. For example: "Thank you" is "Lank oo" Her older sisters name is Aaliyah and she says "eea" Spoon is "Poon" Stairs is "tairs" and so forth. Also she is really short she still fits in 24month clothing very rarely 3T. Her teeth in her mouth are all disproportioned. The doctors say they will straighten and she gets older and taller but if she is growing slowly now and continues I'm Worried that her adult teeth will be crooked as well.
I could be wrong but it's hard finding a doctor who will listen to a word you say in this town that I live in. In order for me to have her checked by somebody willing to listen to what I have to say, I will have to travel an hour a way. I am willing to do this but I would like others opinions.
2 people like this
7 responses
@Niah1976 (739)
• Paranaque, Philippines
26 Mar 09
hi there! don't be so sad about that. kids develop differently. just be patient with her. and try to take her to the public places so she will see other people and interact with other kids. i have a daughter turning 4 this saturday. she knows her alphabet, she can write her name julia and can even type it in the pc.she knows how to count from 1 to 10. i will be sending her to school next schoolyear. what i do to teach her is that i buy books that she likes and we read it together. i let her watch tv so she will learn how to speak fluently. she can't pronounce letter L she replaces it with W.
So i think just be patient and play and teach her without her noticing that you are teaching her.
Good luck to you and to your kid!!!
@magrylouyu (1627)
• United States
26 Mar 09
I am not upset I love her either way. It's just difficult trying to get her to learn. She is very defiant. My 5 year old, she is smart as a whip. I think in September she is going to be very bored with Kindergarden. She can count to 30, was potty trained at 2 1/2, knew all her letters by reconision by 3, could spell her name at 4 and write (Aaliyah) and can read some words. I know my 3 year old (Claire) is learning at a slower rate, I just want to keep an open mind so I am not having this come as a suprise if she does happen to have it. Sounds like your little one is quite the smart one as well. Thank you for your response.
1 person likes this
@jbrooks (264)
• United States
26 Mar 09
it is hard to tell if she does have autism since no one will listen to you.
first i would do some research online or at your local library. second i would take what i found right to your doctor and make them run tests on her so everyone will know where to go from there.
my niece has it and she barely talks but loves to play, she has mood swings at the drop of a hat.
1 person likes this
@magrylouyu (1627)
• United States
26 Mar 09
It is hard to tell. I am planning on having them test her on her 4 year check up in early May but my friend just brought her 7 year old there and he refused testing for ADD and anger issues. I will try my regular pediatrian and if it's a no go I am planning on bringing her to a better licensed Hospital, like Boston Medical. Thank you for your response.
@Bevsue (251)
• United States
27 Mar 09
Check out the easy to eliminate stuff too. Food allergies, hearing test and pin worms. I hate to see kids get tangled up in 'special needs' classes until everything else is eliminated. These three things can also cause some of the behaviors you noticed.
@MysticTomatoes (1053)
• United States
26 Mar 09
Contact your child's pediatrician and demand that an MRI be done with and without contrast to check for autisim. There are special procedures done during autism checks for MRIs that can determine whether not she has it. If your pediatrician won't listen, find one that will.
@magrylouyu (1627)
• United States
26 Mar 09
I will try giving that a try. I'm just hoping they at least hear my side of the story. Most doctors up here never do. Thank you for your response.
@TLChimes (4822)
• United States
27 Mar 09
http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1950091.aspx?p=1#2_19169727
I posted some helpful links here and another poster added some in her response.
I suggest that you do the following....
Start writing everything down. Date, what happened, and how long it lasted.
Keep track of your concerns.
Make an appointment with the school to see what they say.
Make an appointment NOW with your pediatrician and ask for a referral to a neurologist. If nothing else it gets her on their radar. It may not be autism but could be another something (like PDD) and they are best able to tell you.
If it's just night terrors they can give you ideas how to handle it. From my own experience I learned one major thing... Just sit on the edge of the bed. If talking to her in a soft voice doesn't set her off then talk to her. Let her know you are there. Mine would end up with her head on my lap and as long as I didn't touch her until she was back a sleep, it brought us both comfort.
I have more resources if you want them. Friend me and ask if you want to.
@magrylouyu (1627)
• United States
28 Mar 09
I am going to start writing everything down. I hope everyones idea's help me. Thank you for your response.
@Canellita (12029)
• United States
26 Mar 09
This is really not the right place to get help so as soon as you read this please visit http://www.nationalautismassociation.org/.
What litte advice I can offer:
The first thing I would do is find a forum for parents of autisctic children. Besides the professionals they are the ones with the most experience in dealing with this sort of thing.
Second, don't assume the problem is autism. Do keep a journal and try not to worry. I have had students who were much older who still used "baby+talk" pronunciations when speaking. Speech can be corrected should it become necessary.
Remember that all children develop differently and your daughter is an idivual and has her reasons for being who she is that may not have anything to do with a developmental problem.
The night time screams are another matter and can be an idication of some kind of trauma. Based on the doctors not agreeing about the autism (it is still early for accurate diagnoses) I am thinking trauma is more likely the cause.
The Third thing I would do in light of all this is take her to a social worker and just let the person get to know her and observe her over a few months. If there has been some kind of trauma this person will know how to spot the signs and if there is a developmental problem this person will be able to give you a qualified referral.
Mothers always worry over their children and doctors don't always take every concern to heart. Take a deep breath, follow the steps above and just keep hoping for the best possible outcome.
Good luck!
@magrylouyu (1627)
• United States
26 Mar 09
I will look in to that site, Thank you. I do just want to keep an open mind that is all. I cant think of any trama that could have happened. I've been a stay at home mom for over 2 years. I've never had a babysitter. Her going to preschool this year is the first time she has ever left my side and it's only 16 hours a week. The doctors I used to have in MA took every word I said in and listened to me. Where I live now in NH, a few doctors (my childrens doctor being one of them) is being sued for mis dignosis. I hope everyone is correct and she is just learning slower then children her age. Thank you for your response.
1 person likes this
@Canellita (12029)
• United States
26 Mar 09
It sounds like you need to hurry and find another doctor. Try asking some of the other mothers at the preschool for referrals.
Trauma doesn't have to be anything you would consider major. She could have somehow seen a horror movie and is now having nightmares. Someone could have read "Where the Wild Things Are" and she could be dreaming about monsters under the bed, you just never know. Your concerns are not unfounded and you know your child better than anyone.
I will tell you though, several years ago my cousin had a son with a woman he had been involved with when they were both in the military. They went their separate ways and when the child was two years old he came for a visit. I was living with my grandparents at the time and somehow the child ended up spending most of his visit with us.
My grandmother, who could be very negative and my cousin's mother would talk about how quiet the child was and my grandmother suggested something might be wrong with him because he wasn't talking. This pi--d me off because I could see nothing but a happy, sweet little boy. After two weeks here the child was chatting up a storm and when his mother arrived to bring him back to Chicago it was me he screamed for.
Now I am not saying your child isn't getting what she needs from you but this little boy just needed the right kind of connection to get him going. Since I have never met your daughter I don't have any real suggestions for you. I could keep asking questions to assess the situation but I really think a qualified social
worker would be the best route.
@Anora_Eldorath (6028)
• United States
27 Mar 09
Marylou-
I'd check with your local school district about pre-screening her. Most districts have a program which allows a child age 2 to be screened for special education. If she is found to have a special needs they will draft an IEP and begin pre-school services now so that she's more ready for kindergarten. I know my stepdaughter went through this process and the state pays for it. Here's a link to an advocacy agency that works with NH that may be able to point you in the right direction, who to speak to, etc.
http://www.seaca-info.com/
Namaste-
Anora
