Would you (or do you) ban your kids from using the computer or internet?
By mommyboo
@mommyboo (13174)
United States
March 28, 2009 7:41pm CST
Is this based on age, like would you lift the ban at a certain age, or would you have strict guidelines like only certain sites, only for school, only while you are looking over their shoulder, or do you go further and install a keystroke counter or something that shows you everything they've looked at and everything they've done during their time online? I know there are even programs where you can get on another pc or laptop and 'see' exactly what someone on another pc or laptop is doing simultaneously, as well as take control of their computer lol.
How far do you go? Or how far DON'T you go? Are you the type of parent who doesn't look at what your kid does online? Is it because you trust them? Do you trust other people?
2 people like this
13 responses
@fwidman (11514)
• United States
29 Mar 09
I had a blocking program on the computer a couple of years ago, as my daughter went to some pretty strange sites 
But, it did interfere with things that were okay for her to see so I had to take it away. But I do go through her history every now and then and let her know if I find anything too bad. Sometimes she just visits sites without thinking about where they are or what they are and suddenly I have a virus on the computer and that isn't good. She has been pretty good about that though since the computer went down completely for a bit. She's almost 18 now so I don't worry that much about where she goes 
But, it did interfere with things that were okay for her to see so I had to take it away. But I do go through her history every now and then and let her know if I find anything too bad. Sometimes she just visits sites without thinking about where they are or what they are and suddenly I have a virus on the computer and that isn't good. She has been pretty good about that though since the computer went down completely for a bit. She's almost 18 now so I don't worry that much about where she goes 2 people like this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
29 Mar 09
The main reason I even made a myspace was to keep tabs on my older kids lol. I also had to do things like shoot down their attempts to pretend they were 17 and 20 when they were actually 13 and 14. I snuffed THAT pretty quickly. I don't think I'd ever gotten a virus on my computer because of THEIR browsing but I did get one myself either from youtube or downloading things, as it popped up after I had done either thing.
My son will be 18 in June, I rarely worry about him these days because his site browsing is usually narrowly restricted to xbox live sites, myspace, skateboard sites and forums, car sites and forums, and online game/cartoony things. We've only warned him from time to time about keeping his downloading to audio files and not programs or video lol. Streaming video is fine because we have netflix, but not downloads.
1 person likes this
@fwidman (11514)
• United States
29 Mar 09
Oddly enough, all of the bugs she picked up were from sites that are supposed to be Russian, with the dot ru at the end of their address. I am more likely to pick up bugs than she is, but then (I hope) I go to more offbeat sites than she does
Too many people have gotten bugs from downloading programs. These days I am more likely to save the file and scan it before I ever open it up. I've learned through the years
Too many people have gotten bugs from downloading programs. These days I am more likely to save the file and scan it before I ever open it up. I've learned through the years 
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
29 Mar 09
So far my daughter is only 3.5 years old. Although she's been playing with some education games on her computer but have not gone on the internet by herself yet. I do bookmark Disney website for her and that is the only thing she goes to on the internet. But as she grows older, i would probably provide her some useful bookmarks for her to use and when she is like 8 or 9 years old, then i will let her use the internet on her own but with some supervision.
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
29 Mar 09
I have a 5 year old and she doesn't really use the computer much yet. I have let her play some games before but she doesn't know how to navigate sites, even bookmarked ones. Probably a good thing that mommy's computer is cluttered up with all sorts of icons she can't 'read' yet lol.
We'll probably build her a computer when she gets older, and likely I will set it up with only a certain handful of sites she can access, as well as keeping it out in the main parts of the house rather than her room. With my older kids, before we got them computers, they only used OUR computers in our room, and since one of us was always sitting at the other computer at the same desk when they were using it, it was kind of hard for them to get away with anything suspicious lol.
@vicki2876 (5636)
• Canada
29 Mar 09
I let all three of my children use the internet. I have a 13 year old girl and 2 sons that are 9 and 7. They have all been using the internet for about 4 years now. I find that they don't really stray from their "favorites" sites though. I have so far have not had any problems with them using it. I have pop up blocker so their isn't any dirty stuff popping up and they don't go looking for naughty sites. I know all their passwords and the main computer that the boys use is where I can see what they are on. My daughter now has a laptop that I do go on sometimes and haven't found anything bad on there. I teach them about being safe online and to not give out any information. I call it being a net ninja. Get on do what you want and let noone know you were there. LOL I do trust my daughter to not give out this info and she has even gotten me to see what her friends have posted online in shock and tell them that they should not do that. I do trust my children because they haven't given my a reason not to. They have always been good online and I would only stop them using it if I see that they are not following the "ninja" code. LOL
@GioBuffon (119)
• Canada
29 Mar 09
Ninja haha that's a funny code to use :P I don't think you should worry about your kids just yet. When they get older though keep an eye on them for what sites they do go on. Happy to assist you :)
1 person likes this
@Carpathian (582)
• United States
29 Mar 09
Well, I have been very open with my kids and I tell them to be very open with me. It has worked out so far. I mean if they want to know something I tell them but I do not go into graphic details. I just tell the basics. And, that way they are not learning it on the streets or from friends who think they know. So, when they are on the house computer they show me or just let me know because they don't want me to worry. My son even ask me, "Mom, can you check this site before I get on it?" Because, he knows their are bad sites and he does not want to see them or cause more work for me when I have to get rid of the virus or Trojan that might be on that site. My daughter is the same way in helping me out and trusting me. I think if you are honest with your kids and trust them then they will be honest with you and trust you. I am not blind but I am caring. They are 14 boy and 16 girl just if you wanted to know.
**Peace and Love get's you through everything in Life**
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
29 Mar 09
Ahh so they are teenagers . Teenagers are different as far as if they know how to make good decisions, they do not need to have the boundaries little kids need. Of course sometimes they revert to acting as if they are four... that's always a joyful occurrence!
I agree, I'd rather they ask or find out from me. When I was pregnant with my little one, I shared my pregnancy books and information from sites with my other daughter, who was 13 at the time. She decided as a result (and watching me be sick daily for about 5 months) that she wasn't interested whatsoever in getting pregnant as a teen lol. Even when some of her friends did that, she would tell them that she knew too much to want to do that to herself. She's 19 now, I do think eventually she may want kids. I'm grateful of course that my openness with her led to her not thinking it was a great idea all by herself. I never told her that it would be the end of her life or anything, just that she may have OTHER things she'd rather enjoy in life first.
. Teenagers are different as far as if they know how to make good decisions, they do not need to have the boundaries little kids need. Of course sometimes they revert to acting as if they are four... that's always a joyful occurrence!
I agree, I'd rather they ask or find out from me. When I was pregnant with my little one, I shared my pregnancy books and information from sites with my other daughter, who was 13 at the time. She decided as a result (and watching me be sick daily for about 5 months) that she wasn't interested whatsoever in getting pregnant as a teen lol. Even when some of her friends did that, she would tell them that she knew too much to want to do that to herself. She's 19 now, I do think eventually she may want kids. I'm grateful of course that my openness with her led to her not thinking it was a great idea all by herself. I never told her that it would be the end of her life or anything, just that she may have OTHER things she'd rather enjoy in life first.
@moneymommy (3418)
• United States
29 Mar 09
My children are not allowed online without my supervison. There to much online to be worried about.
2 people like this
@GioBuffon (119)
• Canada
29 Mar 09
If I had kids I would trust them. I know there's a lot of things on the Internet but hey! when are they gonna learn about all these things ? Let them live !
@cassandralynn (1084)
• United States
29 Mar 09
The only time I ban my son from his computer is when he doesn't do what I tell him to do, for example, if he doesn't pick up his toys in his room he gets banned from the computer until he picks up his toy mess. His computer desk is in eyes peek to my computer desk so I'm always aware what he's doing on the computer. He mostly plays his education kid games on his computer or he visits his own personal website I made for him ( I made a online games page for him, I found the codes for some of his favorite online games and placed them all at one private site for him and I use that as his own online home page when he open's his browser)So he either he is at his mom approved personal page or he visits 3 other kid websites all the time. He's only 7 and isn't aware how big the net is yet, which is perfectly fine with me . But I watch him like a hawk when he's online.
@carrine (2743)
• Philippines
29 Mar 09
actually my 14 yr old son is very fan on online games, so i let him use the pc than going outside the house and rent a computer just to play those games, grrrrr im having a hard time disciplining on him honestly. well i have faith in God i know he will help me about my concern with my son. hehehe
@Anora_Eldorath (6028)
• United States
29 Mar 09
My children from this marriage are still young but our rules concerning the net will be that they cannot get online without us sitting next to them monitoring their usage. There is too many things that even with parental locks can occur. And besides, it's good to be involved with your kids. They certainly don't need to be on social networking sites, etc. The pc will be for them to do their school work, and if the net is needed it can be done with us.
And no, I don't trust other people online. It's bad enough the stuff adults do to other adults, but these are my children and I am responsible for them.
Namaste-Anora
@heehaw78 (566)
• Malaysia
29 Mar 09
the best is i would suggest you to be with them when they are online. you will need to monitor them, but try provide them some space to let them have some privacy also if possible from time to time.
Banning them are not encourage for they will start to go outside and use the internet either in cybercafe or friends house. That would even be worst for you will not know what they are doing and what may happend.
Many kids nowadays just goes online to play games only , maybe can encourage them create website or blog or encourage them do programming.
@la_chique (1498)
•
29 Mar 09
I wouldnt ban my kids from using the computer/internet, but I'd keep it in a family room where I could see what they were on if I needed to, and would only permit a computer in the kids rooms when they got to middle teens.
