Do we really need to be in style like our co-workers to fit-in in a workplace?
By iskayz
@iskayz (5420)
Philippines
April 8, 2009 5:43am CST
Hi everyone!
In a working environment, does fitting-in in a work place have something to do with the way you dress? I mean should an employee be obliged or voluntary obliged herself to dress up the way her/his co-workers dresses, even if she can’t really afford to buy expensive clothing?
I am asking this cause I think my sister has seen it all wrong. My sister works in a much known company and she badly wanted to fit-in with her co-employees. She said it would be embarrassing if she won’t dress up the way they dress. As a result, she continues to buy expensive clothing and wanted to be in style like her co-employees who in reality belongs to a rich family. Well, she has been like that ever since we were kids. She never wanted to be left behind by her friends’ styles. But as a result of her attitude her credit card bills are way over her salary and she can’t even pay them in full thus, interests continues to add up and still she continues to use her credit card.
I wanted to know what you think of this matter. I never worked in a luxurious company like my sister. I have worked but I do field work so we dress up differently. There are times I dress up formally if the need arises but I never thought that I should dress up the way my co-workers does, buying expensive clothing and the like to fit in cause if not, I will look embarrassing.
6 people like this
15 responses
@tolits_phils (96)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
i think that performance is still foremost so one can really be recognized and fit in the workplace. but of course looking good will also have its advantages. people will tend to like her more. it will also be beneficial to her self esteem and confidence.
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
Hmm.. That's a good thought. You know my sister really has changed a lot in carrying herself. She is more confident now. I know she has to dress up good but I'm just worried about her credit card bills. It's way over beyond her salary and still getting higher.
1 person likes this
@psyche49f (2502)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
Not in my place of work. I guess that applies to big companies where employees have to dress up in order to impress their clients. We work wearing our uniform, so there's no way that we need to buy expensive clothes just to keep up with co-workers. If ever, I'd not feel comfortable in a setting where you have to wear expensive clothes, and I hope with higher pay. Our uniform suits me well.
2 people like this
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
Hi! I would also like it better working in my uniform. It's less expensive having to buy new clothes all the time. And so that means my sister has to keep up with the way her co-workers dresses? Hmmm... I guess that's the disadvantage with having to work without uniforms.
1 person likes this
@AcousticSoul (1309)
• United States
8 Apr 09
I got a job 3 years ago at a fashion coporation, and all of the hundred plus employees dressed really nicely. and I wanted to fit in. the only difference is I know how to bargin shop and still look really good. I do have to say it does depend on where you work and how they dress because the JOb I am at now is very laid back and causal and I dress down almost every day.
but as far as your sister going into debt her wordrobe should not exceed her income.
she doesn't have to keep up with the jones to fit in. tell her to get her own style of clothing where she doesn't have to justify the name brand or where she got it from... to me thats a little superfical for her co-workers to judge her because she doesn't have the means to dress like them. but I understand because in these times fashion is the forefront everyone is into fashion
1 person likes this
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
9 Apr 09
Hi! I guess I can't blame my sister for having to go into debt from buying nice clothes. The company she's working with is a really good company and from what I know it's hard to get a job there. Maybe employees there really do dress well.
Plus the fact that in their department they don't wear uniforms. So when she got promoted, she has to buy a whole set of wardrobe. But she must learn that she needs to shop at cheaper stores too.
Happy posting!
@catabianca (142)
• Tunisia
8 Apr 09
I'm lucky, I have no uniform to wear, I'm gpoing to work with my own dressings, but we need to be good looking man in order to get respect and give respect to your work!
1 person likes this
@emilie2300 (1882)
• United States
8 Apr 09
I don't think you have to be in style with your co workers in order to fit in.
You shouldnt try to fit and just be your self. Wear what you feel is comfortable.
But at my job we have to wear smocks and dress pants. Jeans got baned last year.
1 person likes this
@emilie2300 (1882)
• United States
10 Apr 09
Yeah but what sucks is I don't work in a office and we don't get to have civilian day.
It would be nice to let us dress down one day a week. I work in a day care and we wear smocks like a scrub shirt and we have to wear polyester pants it sucks so bad.
I mean who wants to wear dress pants to a daycare to get destroyed puked on and what ever else. I hate it but I am dealing with it.
Have a Happy Easter... Happy posting to you also....
@deviander (20)
• Canada
8 Apr 09
This is simply a psychological problem. Fitting in any environment does not require you to dress the way they do, unless everyone in that environment wears the same uniforms. Of course, you have to be tidy and clean, not dirty and smelly. As long as you're nice, friendly, talkative, outgoing, and all those billions of positive adjectives that describes a person, you can easily fit into your workplace. Some people feel like they're always by themselves, but they're not born for it, it's the way they act. There are rare situations where people try to stay away from you because of some rumors / facts about you or someone related to you. I don't think this happens (much) in today's society, though.
So, iskayz, my suggestion is to tell your sister not to DRESS the way her co-workers dress, but be herself and WORK the way her co-workers work. Hope this helps.
1 person likes this
@roniroxas (10560)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
well it always depends on what is your style. if it is a corporate world then you will be out of style if you wear rubber shoes around the office. but your sister, i agree with you, she took it all wrong, and wanted to jive with them in a wrong way. if she spends more than what she earns then working has not much meaning anymore. i have some younger friends who are just new in singing in the bands. and of course they can not afford to buy cool clothes. booths and accesories. i just bring them to used items shops where they can get cool stuffs that are affordable. she will look embaracing for thats what she thinks. sometimes we over react on some things that are really not like that. if she wants to dress up, then dress properly. look for sales and marked down prices. i have a few branded clothes but i make sure that i always look for discounts.
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
Yes.. I think she really is just trying to jive in with the way her co-workers dresses. Well what else is new with her. She's been like that since childhood. Always wanting whatever her friends has and not be left behind with regards to fashion.
I tried bringing her to cheap stores cause there are lots available nowadays. There are really nice clothes too but to her it doesn't look good if its not branded.
@syankee525 (6261)
• United States
8 Apr 09
well you dress for the job, but to dress like everyone else, wanting just to go out and buy high clothes like other just to fit in. naww
i am like i dont spend or i can spend lot of money on clothes and i will not jut to fit in.
tell her she would be fake, be herself and more people will like her.
1 person likes this
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
Well I would like to really tell her that she's not herself anymore and that she's a fake just trying to fit but I don't want to hurt her feelings. We always had fights every time I see her coming home with a bag full of clothes.
Sometimes I just shut my mouth and try hard not to say anything to her. Sometimes I would even see her hiding those bags of clothes and shoes. She is out of control trying to fit-in.
1 person likes this
@rymebristol (1808)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
as much as possible that be yourself and look good and the most important thing is work hard in your job.
being in style just to cope with co-workers is optional.
@Lee_Rites (845)
• United States
8 Apr 09
I believe that if you have a good character and good work ethic you will be respected regardless of what you wear. But if she feels the need to dress like everyone else to fit in, you will not likely be able to change these feelings.
1 person likes this
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
You think so? I may not be able to change her feelings?.. You know, thinking about it you maybe right. It's been a long time since I have been trying to awaken her senses about trying to fit-in but it seems her mind is fixed to what she really wants. I guess I should stop nagging her about it from now on.
Happy posting!
@deejean06 (1952)
• United States
8 Apr 09
Hi iskayz...I think as long as she's dressed nicely she doesn't need to spend zillions of dollars on the latest fashions. I've purchased suits from thrift stores, had them cleaned and they look great. You don't have to spend tons of money to look great if you know where to go to get nice clothing. Personally I think it stinks that so much emphasis is put on fashion and particularly name brands. I think all the rage now is brand name pocketbooks. I've gotten gently used brand name bags at thrift stores for a fraction of the cost.
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
9 Apr 09
Yeah I agree with you that fashion has put emphasis on the brand of clothes. That's why some people think that if the clothing is not branded, it's not fashionable. Just like the way my sister thinks.
I like going to thrift stores too. I know a friend whose an expert thrift store shopper and she can find great clothes that are very very cheap.
Happy posting!
@CJscott (4187)
• Portage La Prairie, Manitoba
8 Apr 09
I wear Uniform too. It is easier that way, and the employer has to pay for it. Here anyways. But, you Sister should just have to dress nice, not like others. And would it hurt for her to shop at a quality second hand store? I get all my formal clothes second hand, much much cheaper. You should talk to her about the disadvantages of debt, and stuff like that. Sounds to me like she has enough clothes, if that is all that is causing her credit cards to sky rocket.
1 person likes this
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
8 Apr 09
I have tried countless times telling her to buy cheaper clothes. Dress appropriately but not having it expensively. She has a big salary but it would need 3 months of it to pay for her credit card bills alone. Excluding the bills she has to pay for her sons maintenance. She is already married by the way.
I also told her not to try and be like her stylish and already rich co-workers who can afford to buy branded clothes. But she refuses to listen to me. She would always say, "if you would only see how my co-workers dress up you would feel embarrassed." Sometimes I think she's only using her workplace as an excuse just to buy the things she wants.
@maiann (29)
• Philippines
9 Apr 09
Well i think no as long as you dress properly and comfortably. You should not be getting dressed the way your co-workers dress because that dress might not be good on you or you're not comfortable in wearing it.. your goal should be as long as you are properly dress in an office, party, gathering and you look good at it well you are already in style .... why bother to buy expensive clothes if you look fat in it, you look ridiculous when you are with your officemate..... Better yet choose clothes that enhances your look and not by how expensive, how stylish it is ....
@csrobins (1120)
• United States
8 Apr 09
You shouldn't have to be in style if you don't want to or can't afford it. Peopel who need to be impressed by other's outer appearance aren't worth worrying about anyways. You need to wear what you want to wear-the only people you need to be concerned about is your boss. You still have to dress professional-but there are ways to be professional and still be within your budget. I do it. There are also ways to dres "in style" and stay within your budget also. I do that as well.