When things are tough, how do you show your support?

I'm so sorry for the financial stress your family is facing. First of all... is there anything you can cut back on? We're working on canceling the cable b/c I recently signed up for netflix for $17 a month we get three movies at a time, etc. So that knocks a HUGE chunk off the bill. I got rid of my cell phone and if i feel the need for another I'll get a prepaid phone. I started going to A LOT of other websites to look for grocery coupons (food, soaps/shampoos, toilet paper, cat food, everything). Just keep reasuring him that he's doing wonderfully and this won't last forever. Let him know that everyone is happy and he should be less hard on himself. Maybe think of fun little ways to welcome him home after his long day of work... have dinner on the livingroom floor on a picnic blanket with a good movie instead of at the table - I don't knowh ow hold your girls are... but have them make fun little crafts for daddy to give him when he gets home. With my fiance, Joslynn (my daughter) and I draw silly little pictures when he's away, date the back of them and hide them in the bottom of draws and in the glove box and all kinds of places. Sometimes he finds them right away, sometimes he doesn't find them till a month later... but he has fun trying to think of where they could be and is always interested to see the dae on them. It lets him know that we're thinking of him all the time. Send the girls to the neighbors while you have some "quiet time" whether its "fun adult" quiet time... or just that... layingon the couch giving each othe foot rubs while catching up on life. I guess what I'm trying to say is... the bills are paid. That's an important thing. Wheter its a month early or on the due date, you're not falling behind. You have a loving family (which is number one) and you're concerned about him which is great. Maybe words aren't enough for him. Get everyone involved in showing appreciation for him and make sure to keep a smile on your face... its what he needs most of all. I hope everything looks up for you! Take careand good luck!

Financial situations are building higher everyday. The best to way to see throguh it is to be grateful for what you do have now. Most people lost everything, home, job, car etc. and have nothing left. Your husband sounds like a great man to even try to continue working hard to make the best out of the situation for you and your kids. Always remind him that what he does for your family you all are grateful for. Remind him of other families who are not as lucky as you are. A man always wants to feel that he is "the Man". And I understand that position that they try to hold. When my husband is down about out situation I just always tell him how grateful and special he is. I go out of my way to show my appreciation to him by doing special things for him. I have surprises waiting for him when he walks in the door. One time me and my kids made a big banner that said, We love you Dad, you are the greatest and we hung it up in the livingroom, and then 1 of my kids wrote him something special and read it to him and my other 2 kids made special pictures. Needless to say my husband was very surprised and I saw his spirits went up. So everyday I try to do some speical things for him. Even the smallest things count. I hope I helped you a bit more.

Just continue to do the things you are doing. And be certain to always have the house clean and maybe supper ready for him when he does come home. This is one thing that makes me feel better when I arrive home from working. It makes you feel as though you really are doing what is right. If he knows you aren't just sitting around doing nothing it will make it easier for him to deal with. Also think about using coupons and rebates to help alleviate some of the financial burden. You may also try having a garage sale or selling items on Craigslist or ebay or some other site like that. when you have extra money be sure to use it to pay down some of your debt. I have paid off several bills since the beginning of the year and this has made life easier for the entire family.

Hey, I am very proud of a person like you. You are doing your best to be a mother and to be a best wife. I am single, don't have hubby but what I can advice is, we all have problems, some are much heavier that what your husband is feeling. Life is like a wheel one day you are up one day you are down, tell him that you are thankful that God gave you the person you really needed. The person that completes you, the person that will make you happy whatever status in life you have. Maybe he doesn't see it because he is shy of what life he is giving to you, no no no bad thinking hubby, tell him that you choose to be with him and you will accept whatever he can offer and that is enough with you. You have to let him feel that his hardship is very appreciated. Always says thank you and I love you in front of him. In the first place, being with your family is most important than money.

I am married but my husband doesn't work (never has) but thats another story. I work part time, go to school full time and have a son (6). I know how stressful it is to worry about money for the household bills and other issues that may arise. I get very stressed and upset so I can see where he gets his feelings plus being a male that makes them feel worthless and takes from his pride. I would just make sure he knows no matter what you will always be there for him and will try your best to help in anyway possible. Right now, everyone is in the same position with losing their jobs, some are even losing their house, hours cut, etc. just let him know there are people who are worse off and as long as you are getting the bills paid everything is fine. My step father likes to hourd money (not kidding) he will always say he is broke and we all know he has about 10 grand if not 20 in the bank. He hasn't even finished remodeling his house because he don't want to touch it. He is shutting off their internet and cable to save money and if they want to use the internet my brother comes to my house. He was even talking about shutting off their cell phone or cutting down to two lines (3rd line is his brothers) to save money on the cell phone bill. He is finding all sorts of ways to cut off and save money. If he does all this he will save 200 a month. I know it may be hard, I myself don't get any extra money but just for bills and maybe have enough left for gas. I also do things online and trying to work at them more each day to earn more a month also. Good luck and I wish you the best. Keep your chin up and keep praying. We all will be praying for you and others in the same situation.

I really wish I had some good advice here. My husband has a good job, yet still worries all the time that he may lose it or other things will go wrong. He says many times he is a failure. I always tell him God has always taken care of us and that he should stop worrying so much and leave it up to God were our life is going and just enjoy the blessings we have. He says yeah and the very next day, he is worried again. So my answer is more in relation to you than having any really advice. I wonder really sometimes if men are from Mars???...LOL

My partner and I have known each other since he had nothing. I've never left him for a richer man, he knows that and I think I don't have try too much to show my support. I do as I always do. When we had financial problems, I didn't try to make more money, it might injure him because he could think that I was troubling on his capacity. I just reduced my spends. During the hard time, I did't go shopping for lux things, I didn't ask him for go out for dinner. Even I did't ask a gift if it was for my birthday. I can stand the material lack if we're together. After that, when the difficulties were over, my partner always said that he hadn't mischosen the love of his life.

just be patient and don't end your support even if sometimes he will burst out his emotions. most men feel it the same way and they handle the same way. as a wife, you need to be most patient enough and pray. avoid things or expenses that are not really that necessary. that would help a lot.

I am in a somewhat similar situation. I think that a man needs to hear from his wife that he is doing a good job in trying to be a provider for his family. Sometimes small words and gestures here and there can really do something to bring someone's mood up. I have a small child and we also have bills and we have been behind. It is a struggle to keep food on the table but we are trying to over come this. This is not a great economy right now and I believe that a lot of families are having their struggles as well. Once thing I also do is just count my blessings and pray a little. There could be some light at the end of the tunnel some day. Your husband is definitely not a failure. He probably just feels bad because he is trying to keep up with the finances and there are set backs. It might take some time to get back on your feet again but I am sure it will happen. If you keep trying to encourage him it will give him the incentive to not give up. That is what I try to do. Take care and best of luck to you.

Let him feel that your situation is much better than others. It's alright though maybe quite a little financially hard up but there's no health or legal problems. For the meantime when everyone is experiencing this recession it's alright living simply. Tell him this is temporary, life will change after a while. Yes, prayers do help a lot.

Hi mom and welcome to mylot...I have much respect for you and your husband. I wish I could stay home with my son but for the moment it's just not possible. I think financial stress is the worst but the thing you and he should be focused on is the fact that you are taking care of your family, keeping it together and working through it. You are wonderful and you should be proud of yourself!

I'm not married, so I dont really know what to say to you. All I can do is encourage you to support him with words of comfort, peace and assurance and let him know that you are there for him no matter what. Increase the hugs and the kisses and the affection.. Make him feel more than a king and he will surely rise up from that discourgement. My aunt was in a similar situation as yourself and I watched how she did it so am just telling you from her experience. Hope it helps...

I would say those specific things to show him how you feel, "you are a awesome, talented, smart and handsome guy,". Tell him what attracted you to him in the first place. Then show him how those qualities still apply to your relationship today. If your husband is just down in the dumps I would continue to encourage him and continue to pray. Tell your husband that there are few people who are not in the same boat as you guys due to the current economy. However, if you ever think he is more than down in the dumps maybe suggesting counseling or talking to his pcp about his feeling would help. good luck.

You are a loving wife. The words you comment on your husband should be heard or known by your husband. Then you try to get something to be done by your husband. on one hand, these things can distract his attention from his failure; on the other hand, they can make him realize that he is still the person in life you or children or friends value, love and respect. You try to get him realize his importance or value again. Otherwise, you don't show your worries or discontent with him before him. Your children can also be a good help to you. Their loveliness or understanding can also make him know how happy his family. your husband is a wise man. He will regain his confidence before long. Best wishes.

I know the feeling. My husband feels down because of our finance, but every chance you get encourage him. Tell him you love him. Tell him how much you appreciate him. Do something for him that he really enjoys for example bake his favorite cake, ccok his favorite food. Let him know even though your are just getting by you are making it. He has to realize he is taking care of his home. He's a real man for that. There are people out here there are in worst shape then we are, If you are into religion... pray for your family and your husbands strength. It works. Just make sure you let him know you appreciate everything he does. It may take time but he will come to his senses and appreciate what you do have.