rewarding your children with good grade is good or bad?

Rewarding your children for good grades is an excellent idea. However, you are the parent so if the kid turns it into extortion guess what the child should loose? Everything that was given to the child should be taken away from the child until the child shows some respect for the parent and gratitude for what she has. Wow! Teenagers are really nasty huh? Or wait are we talking a tween? Maybe the parent needs to limit the reward to something of lesser value.

I think that your sister has a bigger problem on her hands. If you are going to reward grades you should have a set price list or reward system that is writen down and not flexable. My folks did not do this because there were three of us and we all had different bests. I was an A B student, that was me trying my best. The middle sister never made less than a 95 and if she did she cried and punished herself by studying harder. The youngest did good to make B's. When we did our best we were rewarded with surprises and not what we demanded. On the other hand, my husband and chip in to pay the nieces and nephews for grades, $5 for each B and $10 for each A. It adds up but they also have to buy their own electronics.

I think rewarding is good. I just wouldn't do it to the extent your sister did. Like my sister gets allowances and maybe a prize under ten dollars. THis week her prize was a trip to chucky cheese. I think if you dont over due it then it is fine. I do think being rewarded is necessary. Like at a job you work hard you eventually get a raise. THats our reward.

Rewarding kids with good grade is good if done just enough. I think it is good if the reward is not too much, or if the reward is just given at the end of school year. I can't remember if I was given any reward when I was still schooling. But what I am sure is that I never take my studies for granted. When I am sick my great grandmother won't allow me to go to school. But I kept on insisting. I hate being absent nor late. That attitude stayed with me until now so most of my classmates admired me for that. I always wanted to be on top, so no single recognition or graduation day pass without me getting the top reward. I got no big rewards from my parents. I was contented with their praises. So I guess I will do the same with my son. He is only seven months old but I have already plans for his future. When he goes to school I will make sure that all the encouragement and convincing words will be told to him. I will of course give him reward if he did well in school and got high grades but rewards will just be simple toys or his favorite foods. I do not want kids to manipulate their parents and I hate spoiling kids. I want them to grow naturally and be responsible with their school works. Expensive things are a no no to kids not unless they graduate with the highest honors of belong to top 5. As parents we should be strict and not allow our kids maneuver us. They should be the one to follow and not us following them.

People need motives to do something. It really réally depends on the child. Some kids will want to get high marks so they'll study as hard as they can to get it. But usually, teens won't find that all too important. In that case, if you want them to try harder, you have two options. You can give them a reward whenever they do something nice, or you can take something away from the if they do badly. The problem with giving things is that you learn only to do things when you get something in return. So you'd have to be careful using this technique because it will get quite valuable. I réally have no clue why those parents give an ipod as well as a cellphone for some a's, you could better start with some small things and only when she has done something really good, not just for anything. (not judging, just my opinion) If you starting to take things away when they do badly in school (for example, no internet for some time, no television, whatever they like) it will encourage them to do better, because otherwise they'll lose privileges. But, for some kids (including myself when I was younger) that won't matter much. Sure, it's annoying when it happens, but I never even considered working harder. Maybe the best thing to do is to give something when did something well, and take something away when they did bad. That way, they either have win-win or loss-loss. Anyway, whatever you choose, you might wanna consider just how important it is to get involved with their schoolwork. It's still something they have to do and still something they will either benefit from or will regret later, not the parent. In my humble opinion, you can try to encourage them, explain them why it could be important, but that's all their is.

it realy depends i think because it is true that some kids will only study after a wile to get what they want and then when they dont get any thing there mad and cause truble but i think if you set guid lines and let them know that there are times that even if they get scored at the top of there clases some things are more important then a reword for seting your self up to be susesful in life .though on ocation ive met a teen who evan being tought that was still ungreatful and while your trying to pease them they need to learn that nothing in life is easy and that they have to work hard to get what they want and even then sometimes all that hard work cant always get you what you want.this is an important leson expesuly for teens because they wont be able to expect mommy or daddy to bail them out every time somthing dosnt go ther way any more ther just two steps fom being momys and daddys them selves if there not already wich means we need to stop codling thim and teach them the cold hard truth and yes they'll get mad and say mean things.maby even act out and try to make you feel bad but you have to be strong or they'll never lern the most important leson in life.that is that life is hard evan if you rich or famus you always have some one to anwer to you have to work hard to sevive in this world and be content if not happy.

I just think that it's sad that out society has turned so materialistic. What ever happened to getting rewarded with a trip to the park, or running through the sprinkler with your sisters, or baking cookies with mom?

I think it is always positive to reward your kids when they have performed well. I think this motivates them. I will defiantely reward anyone who performs. I think this will lead them to be better performers next time.

Hi Clorissa, the carrot and stick must be used together. Parents should reward their children for working hard, regardless of the grading. The most important thing is that the children do their best. As long it is their best effort, the marks are not important. So giving ipod and other rewards are appropriate. At the same time, parents should punish their children for not putting in any effort in their work. They can take away existing privilege, like reducing pocket money to the bare minimum necessary for survival, or lock away the computer, or confiscate the mobile phone.

I think that rewarding a child for getting good grades can be an incentive. it is hard when you have a child who isn't working up to their potential. i see that it can get out of control when you have a child who is bargaining with you. they are only hurting themselves but there has to be a better way to make sure that your child is working up to their abilities. kids can be smart the way that they abuse their parents. as a parent you just have to be smarter.

rewarding is good.. but.. limit it though.. coz they might ask for something so expensive.. but it all boils down to one thing.. i guess.. discipline ..

I think rewarding a child to perform better in school is a great thing. It will show them that working hard will get them the things they desire in life. However I believe your sister is abusing it as well. How old is her daughter? My daughter is 9, Grade 3 and one of her friends has a cellphone. I think it is absolutely ridiculous. A young child doesn't deserve all those expensive things regardless. An ipod should only be given maybe as a end of year reward. Not just because she got an A... Maybe this is why the daughter is abusing it. She knows she will get the A so she is going to try and control the situation. But in the end the only person she is hurting is herself, but a child doesn't understand that.

It is always good to reward our children if they will get good grades at school, or even if they do something good, like helping in household chores. It will be a motivation for them to do something good or strive hard at school. BUt we should always explain to them why are we giving them rewards. And not just that if they did otherwise, we should let them know that what they did was wrong and let them suffer the consequences, teach them to be responsible in every action they did.

Yeah, do agree with you that it's common for parents rewarding their childer for good achivements they've done. However, overdoing it will sure be not a good one, instead the children will get spoiled. Just like in the case of your sister rewarding your niece. I can see that the value of the reward keep is increasing each time. What will she going to give in future if this continues? A sports car? A house? i can't imagine that. Indeed this will only make the children become more materialistic and money-minded. They'll only go for things which will give rewards or good return. Thus, in my opinion, rewarding the children is good and should be just simple or moderate ones, and by this i believe both parties will be happy for it.

I have always praised my girls for good grades and never rewarded them. The reward is or should be the knowing that they have done a good job. Likewise, I have never berated them for poor grades but rather encouraged them to do better for their own good. Recently my daughter got a "D" in sewing. I mentioned that I think she needs to pull up some grades. She said..are you talking about sewing mom? If you are...I will never be good in that. I don't like it at all. I'm not going to get on her about it. She is a good kid. The grades are only a small fraction of my concerns in raising her.

I think it is a good idea to reward a child for doing well in school. kids work hard in school and if they are doing good they desreve a little reward. I like to be rewarded when I do well. I think it should not be overdone though.

rewarding your childrens is really great idea as this will make them to become more and more sincere towards their work but you should not make it a habit of rewarding then only reward when they have really done some good thing as this will also be great for their and your happiness

according to your details , if parents reward their children with such things, it is ususal ; that is going in your sister's mind. parents should reward their children for their hard work , but with a limited quantity(means in ratio to their hard work), & when ever a child do less than the previously hardwork , they should rewarded them with a such things that cost to their child(not in actuall price , but according to their child). so, child will do more hard work in future to get more costly things(according to their mind).

uhm well for me parents should reward their kids for having good grades to motivate them to study well again, but this should be done carefully because sometimes kids gets so acquainted to the reward thing that they will always look for a reward in everything that they do. so moderation will be a goo thing

I think its a good idea to a point. If the child gets manipulative than its a problem, you gotta lay down the law. If you are going to do the rewards system then you gotta have both rewards and punishment, if the kid gets good grades he/she gets rewarded. If the kid does something like getting good grades to get something like an iPod for one semester than ignoring his schoolwork the next, you gotta take away the reward. This way its more of if you keep your grades up you get rewards and you get to keep them, if you get bad grades than you lose the rewards given to you if any.