What does it mean when a person won't look you in the eyes?

Hi WebMann..I never thought of that - thanks for the suggestion. I'm sorry you had a rough childhood and I hope you can trust even a few people in your life. I appreciate your honesty and I thank you for the response.

Yeah I have got same experience about this problem, it's mainly because a lot of people didn't help me to give them a certain amount of trust and then subconsiously i started to avoid their looks, there is many factors on side of it which accumulated to that kind of behavior and its often hard to control. it's related to our fear and precautions of not being rejected again. in fact this is what is causing another chain reaction of other people who are not sure of our toughts just because we didn't look into their eyes. I am glad i did understood this problem and after long time i did changed my looks to the people for more confident. But its still there and quite regretful, sad memories. Cheers to everyone who has got same issue, smile a lot and don't be afraid of others!

i know mostly it happens if we are not sure of the other person's trust. hey!! i know lots of people have very difficult childhood but it deos'nt mean that you have to carry it all your life. try to over come the feeling and it will help if there is someone who loves you unconditionally. the world is beautiful and its meant to be lived. generally most people are good at heart. its only bad experiences that make them bitter.

I believe that eye contact should be used as much as possible, and that it does as you said show a professional motive. I would never want to talk to my boss and not look at him. I think there is a certain amount of time that needs to be given throughout a conversation where eye contact is used to show " I understand. "

Hi luv and power... I do always make eye contact - I think it's very important especially in a professional environment. I understand your comment that eye contact is always broken but do you look at the person when you're speaking with them? Or do you avert your eyes? It's interesting that you say it's a matter of judgement. Thanks for the response.

These are very valid points. There are many reasons for breaking eye contact during a conversation. I feel every conversation should start with and end with eye contact, and a smile. It makes the conversations feel better. You should of course, try to look at and listen to who it is that is doing the talking as well. And looking into the eyes of the person you are speaking too can help you judge their receptiveness. But it is not a widely utilized concept. And many people feel they are being evaluated by eye contact and this creates discomfort, so you do have to break it occasionally. Just when talking to girls, focus on something above and behind them, or to the right or left, not down. They seem to take offense at that.

Hi tammy...I understand that you don't like eye contact if you don't like a person. And that could certainly be the case here. However I have never shied away from eye contact in a professional setting whether I liked the person or not. I just think it's rude and unprofessional. Thanks for the response.

Interesting point of view, and all valid points in my opinion. I can look anyone straight in the eye and say anything, though, when I am hiding something from a loved one, I for some reason can not help but giggle. I guess it means the truth always comes out.

I see what you mean. Since in your case it is acceptable to look people in the eye all the time then there must be something wrong. Hope everything works out well.

Hi 2wicelot...You brought up an interesting point. I never even thought of it as a cultural thing. However I don't think this is the case in my case. I think that as co-workers in my culture there should be eye contact. Thanks for the different point of view and thanks for the response!

I would think the person that can look in the eye is telling the truth.

Hi jd...So who doesn't trust who? Does the person who is looking away not trust the person on the other end of the conversation? Or is it the opposite? Does the person speaking know that the other person doesn't trust the speaker?

LOL. I always found it a act of respect. Nothing to be feared or to cause fear by. The desire to create fear, is a negative aspect of life I hope you out grow it one day.

Hi Best Team and welcome to mylot...I in no way wanted this discussion to be cruel to people with certain conditions such as autism. The person about whom I'm speaking does not have any such condition, nor would I care if someone with that condition looked me in the eye or not. I never intended to bring that into the discussion and apologize if you thought so. This person is a fully functioning adult who does not have any such condition - just a habit which strikes me as very rude. However there are different takes on the issue, which is wonderful here at mylot. Again, thanks for the response and I apologize if you took offense.

Hi bestboy...I don't think in this particular case the person is shy but you may be on to something when you state that it could be a confidence issue. Thanks for the response.

Hi waseem and welcome to mylot...You're right - it's different each and every time. Sometimes people are doing other things while talking to you but sometimes it's something else entirely. I always thought that it's rude to not look at someone when you're speaking to them, especially in an office setting. Thanks for the different points and thanks for your response.