I'm feeling guilty about myself

@bhanusb (5709)
India
May 10, 2009 9:50am CST
In my locality I pass a girl almost every day.She is pretty,charming,well dressed and well fashioned. She attracts me. The day I don't pass her I feel bad. A feeling has created within me about her.I can't express what is that.She is much more younger than me. I have good relationship with my wife.We love each other.Now I'm feeling guilty about myself. Am I unfaithful to my wife? Should I avoid that girl? I'm fighting within myself.What should I do?
4 responses
@nanajanet (4436)
• United States
10 May 09
It is a feeling based solely on very little but it is not uncommon for people to have such feelings for others. It is a conscious decision to remain faithful and just because you mention it here means that you are a good man who loves his wife and would not hurt her in such a way. Those feelings will pass, eventually, but avoiding her is not a bad idea.
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
10 May 09
Many thanks nanajanet,then I'm not so bad.According to your advice I shall try to control myself.
@nanajanet (4436)
• United States
12 May 09
Thank you for the best response. Did you ever see Jurassic Park, the movie about dinosaurs being brought to life from old DNA? Well, there was a great line in that movie, "Just because you CAN, does not mean that you SHOULD!" That says it all.
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
12 May 09
I saw the movie.You have picked the appropriate dialogue.
@ketybhagat (4123)
• India
13 May 09
Bhanu, you say the girl is much younger than you, so she will regard you as uncle ! Ok, this happens to all and if you let it play on your mind, you will feel more and more attracted to her. See her as God's creation and no more. If she is pretty, see the hand of God in this and nothing more. Accept the fact that the girl will never look at you twice or even give you a second thought. You love your wife, so just let is pass away. Dont go out of your way to wait for her. This too shall pass away. Remember, the neighbours wife is always prettier. Its normal and let it be. Dont give it much importance. At the time she passes by, be ther with your wife and talk to her. She will help you pass time and this p hase will just go away.
• India
15 May 09
Yipeeeeeee ! Thats my friend.
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
14 May 09
Though late response I'm grateful to you kety. You have given me very thoughtful advice. Yes beauty is God's creation.The girl is a rose in the garden of God.I should see that way.This is a weakness of my mind.You have awakened my conscious.Thanks a lot.
• United States
12 May 09
Hello my friend,don't feel guilty for looking it is just human instinct as long as you don't act upon it,I really don't see the harm in looking.It sounds to me you love your wife very much and that's most important.We all look at other people a time or two,we are simply human.What you are feeling is normal behavior.Just do some special things for your wife and engage in fun activities,you will be fine and this phase will pass,it always does.
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
12 May 09
I'm thankful to you that you found nothing wrong to me. However I shall try to rectify myself.
• Indonesia
10 May 09
I have been in your situation once and I also love my wife very much. I do have a good relationship with her too. But I don't feel guilty at all. I think that's normal as long as you never think to try to cheat your wife. As in my case, the feeling only last for a week and then gone. I guess I still love my wife more. Probably because I know her inside out :)
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
10 May 09
I'm feeling consolation at your response.I also hope my feelings regarding that girl will not last long. Many thanks.
• United States
10 May 09
I think this is a good time to spice things up between you and your wife . Why not go out dancing or something . Spend some more time doing things with her . Romantic things :)