what do yo do when you find out someone talking trash about you behind your back
By syankee525
@syankee525 (6261)
United States
May 12, 2009 7:11am CST
i know so many who will do this, they will talk trash about you behind your back, i can say one thing people who know me know i am not like this, if i have something to say to someone i say it to thier face.
but if i hear someone is talking about me behind my back i will confront them and ask them so what's up ? be big enough to say it to my face.
what do you do if you find someone is talking about you behind your back? do you confront them or leave it alone ?
3 people like this
21 responses
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
12 May 09
but if i hear someone is talking about me behind my back i will confront them and ask them so what's up? be big enough to say it to my face
yep I'm the same way..if you have the nerve to act tough and talk smack about me when I'm NOT around, lets see what you REALLY have when I call you out on it! I can't stand ppl who do that sort of thing..
1 person likes this
@syankee525 (6261)
• United States
12 May 09
yeah one time this guy was talking about me when i faced him its was so different he was like well hum hum. didnt know what to say. so he asked the guy who told me that he was talking aboutm me, the guy was i like you, but my and syankee has too much respect for each other not to tell him, plus it was funny as hell watching to get yourself out of this mess. lol
this time my neice been doing this to my daughter, and they were kind of close until this happen and my daughter too much like me. so now we're waiting to see what my neice have to say about getting busted on.
i love confronting people who talk crap about me, i tell them be big or bad enough to say it to my face, i dont need help to look bad, i do a good enough job of my own making myself look bad, and what they really say just dont matter to me..
i like confronting them to see the reaction on thier face and what dumb excuse they can come up with.
thanks
@drumgurl21 (58)
• Philippines
12 May 09
I'll probably do the same thing you did, ill confront the person ( better in a private area) face to face, and get the facts straight. If he/she has a problem with me then its best to hear it coming from them and its easier to resolve things that way (vs phone call or even text) :)
1 person likes this
@sudhajosyula50 (3808)
• India
13 May 09
Hi friend,
Till now i haven't faced that type of situation.If i face the same situation like you may be i would react like you.I think it is always good to discuss about us sitting in front of us rather than talking about us sitting behind us.I may leave it
for 1-2 times.If it continues like this than i will react to them.
Have a nice day
@underdogtoo (9579)
• Philippines
12 May 09
People tend to do this without thinking, especially people who are close to you. I get the feeling that this is not really intended to hurt you but is just nothing more than trash. Cheers!!
@syankee525 (6261)
• United States
12 May 09
sadly most of the time its people who suppose to be close to you, but most of the time the people who are close to me know way better then to do this with me, they know i am not scare to confront anyone..
thans for your reply
@tundeemma (894)
• South Africa
13 May 09
it depends on the personality of the person involved in the nasty act, if it is someone that is very close to me, i will rather give him or her some warning otherwise it will mark the begining of the end of our friendship, if it is someone new to me, i wilkl rather cut such a operson off immidiately
@kntr07 (9)
• Italy
13 May 09
I'm the same way, I tell people what I think about them to their face. I usually don't confront people who are talking about me behind my back. I think it's because I expect people to at least say things to my face. I know, I know. But most of the time, it's just not worth your time confronting people who have nothing better to do than to talk about behind your back. I usually just shrug it off. But if it was something serious I would confront them. Most of the time, the trash talking is just too funny and I get a kick out of it. If they can't say it to may face then I just feel sorry for them. If they about something that I'm doing, I make it an effort to that it more especially when they are around. I like to play games. But if they make up a lie about me, i guess depending on what it is, I might confront them. I just don't like wasting my time on stupid people.
@Beertjie (976)
• South Africa
12 May 09
Most of the time I would confront the person, depending on the seriousness of the story. If it is something that can cause harm, I would definately confront. If it is something silly I would just tell the person who told me about it that they could judge for themselves whether the story is true or not.
Some people are not worth confronting. They would usualy jump on the back foot and make a scene and make you look stupid. I would then just set the record straight with those who heard the stiry and are doubdting whether it has merrit or not. Usualy after hearing the truth from you, and your side of the story, they would be left to judge for themselves what they want to believe.
@orderfox (231)
• China
13 May 09
I is positive. I will analyze the contents of other people talking about what I? If it is nonsense, I will stay away from to avoid or ignore other people talking about funding again. If it is talking about the issue of my ability, I will positive face and to upgrade their level.
@lynnemg (4529)
• United States
13 May 09
It all depends onwwhat is being said. Some things need to be addressed, while other things aren't worth it at all. For axample, if someone were trying to cause trouble for my family, or trying to cause any of us harm, I would have to confront them and find out what is going on and why. Other things, such as someone saying that I am ugly, fat, too skinny, whatever, are not worth waisting my breath on.
One thing I have learned over time though, is that just because someone says that so-and-so is saying this or that doesn't make it true. If it is a serious matter, I will confront the person if for no other reason than to allow them to have the opportunity to admit or deny the accussations. If, after confronting the person, the trouble persists, I will simply move on with my life and cut them out of it.
@hershiez (464)
•
13 May 09
Hi and hello there, syankee! ^_^
I don't care about them. Just keep talking about me. They are just making me p0pular! Hahaha...
The wheel of karma is run by our sin commitment. Keep that in your mind. And the only reason behind why they back-fight us is they are insecure! Insecurity is a very deadly disease so, just give them a tap and good luck them to get well soon. Hahaha... And also, insecurity reigns with an ugly heart with an empty brain.
Happy MyLotting! ^_^
The wheel of karma is run by our sin commitment. Keep that in your mind. And the only reason behind why they back-fight us is they are insecure! Insecurity is a very deadly disease so, just give them a tap and good luck them to get well soon. Hahaha... And also, insecurity reigns with an ugly heart with an empty brain.
Happy MyLotting! ^_^ @Rainbow2009 (45)
• China
13 May 09
It depends. If those things are really related to my reputation, my virtue or badly influence my happiness, I will manage to clarify the matter. I will confront him or her, because such things are not endurable to me. But if some matters sound silly or not so harmful to me, I will ignore it. Maybe next time, I will involuntarily take what he said about me behind my back to pretend to play a joke with him or her. In that way, he or she will feel embarrassed about that or feel ashamed of himself. I like others to say something to my face. Whether he criticizes me or shouts at me, I will not be angry at or hate him or her, because we are frank and plain. The person who talks trash behind other's back is always mean and despisable.
@zzyw87 (1254)
• Philippines
13 May 09
If I found someone talking behind my back, I confront him/her. I won't let the matter be just tossed aside and let him/her get away from what he/she did because it was wrong especially if it was a rumor he/she is spreading about me. I will ask what his/her problem is and why he/she did it. I would like to know the reason why. I am not a confrontational or violent person but it is something I won't tolerate, especially if it was someone I consider a friend who did it.
@makingmoneysoeasy (70)
• Philippines
13 May 09
Im a very Black and white Person..., but because of doing so.., i got a sobpheona.., which really scares me... My lawyer advised me to sometimes be gray.., it will help... Dont Confront those who talks trash behind you in a manner that it will backfire on you... Anyway Life has a Purpose, according to a song " Tell it to Jesus alone..." hahahaha they can talk about me just as much as they could i'll talked about them down on my knees and just pray. According to the Holy Word " Vengance is Mine saith the Lord of Host" so just do your job and let God do the rest...
@Margajoe (4746)
• Germany
12 May 09
I will confront them if they are worth the confrontation.
If it is someone I consider to be a friend, I will confront.
But, if it is someone I don't consider a friend, I won't care.
I will do nothing, cause these people are normally only jealous people with nothing better to do the whole day. Though if I hear it and have a bad mood, maybe I will get a little angry. Normally I don't care to much about what others say.
Take care, have a nice day!
@nanajanet (4436)
• United States
12 May 09
I look at it this way. People who really know me will not believe it and those who do believe it I do not wish to know, so if it keeps them from me, that is fine. Anyone who listens to gossip without finding out the truth is not worthy of my time or friendship.
Oh, and the person passing it around would be out of my life, too.
@roxannekight (67)
• United States
12 May 09
I ignore it, that is the best thing to do. Who cares what anyone else thinks about me, I dont have time for all that. If the person who is doing all the talking about people behind their backs obviously has something really lacking in their life for them to have so much time for backstabbing. The best thing you can do is kill them with kindness, that will really hurt them.
@Hedwig (283)
• China
12 May 09
I experienced the kind of situation when I was in senior high school. I just left it alone at that time.
Because I didn't think that there was anything I could do. They didnt say it to my face, which gave me no evidence to accuse them.
However, I was very sad when I heard about it and did hate these guys. But I have totally forgiven them now. They were just bored ,maybe even meant any harm to me.
@Shauna_L_B (82)
• United States
12 May 09
really depends... if it is worth the hassle then i will take it to them and get the the bottom of it.. but what i find most of the time,is that the bulls*$#@ comes from people who have nothing going in there life- so in that case no i have more to loose then they do....
