help me?
By sarcasms
@sarcasms (120)
India
July 30, 2009 5:28am CST
i ve been going out wiht a girl fr almost 8 months now and we have fights pretty regularly and i do love her but i feel she doesnt care fr me ...........there s just a limit u know and i guess she has crossed the limit where my slef respect doenst allow me to be with her coz i constatnly feel hurt by her insensitivty towards me ..........so even my mind knows tht she isnt right fr me and its in my best interest to break up with her but i cant do it ..........i dont understand ive been thinkin abt breaking up with her fr 2 months but i dont know why i cant do it ,i just cant let go pls help me wat shuld i do ........why cant i just tell her to go away frm my life........whenever we have a fight i kind of take the blame always and let her be even if it s not my fault .......i jut cant understand wats my hesitancy to let her go even though it s makin my life a living hell .............pls tell me wat to do pls?
3 responses
@swaggalicious (111)
• United States
30 Jul 09
I know this is difficult,especially with someone you love. Take it from me if you have been together 8 months and you are constantly fighting and arguing instead of getting to know each other, you dont need to be with this person. It always up to do, but ask yourself is your happiness more important than being miserable with someone who dont care.
You really need to sit down and talk to her to see where her head is and why she treats you the way she treats you. Maybe a past relationship has messed it up for the future who knows. But if you are not happy as being a couple, you should try being friends since you cant let go.
@sarcasms (120)
• India
30 Jul 09
ive tried everything but i dont know wat to do one proable reason i can come up with is tht im too scared too be alone ..........maybe thts why it might be a problem.....and i just love her so much u know one of the other reasons why i am still with her so tht she isnt dissapointed or her heart breaks...........
@swaggalicious (111)
• United States
30 Jul 09
Yea.. I can understand that. I am married and alot of times I'm not as happy as I was before. I love him and thats why I stay with him. I know he loves me. I question why would you bring so much pain to the one you love. I struggle with some things, but all and all its females that poses as a problem for us. I fight and fight to stay until you just can't fight anymore. I have almost reached that point. I never want to give up, but I dont want to be unhappy. No one wants to be alone.
All I can say is once you are truly fed up you can let go. Scared of being lonely is the number one fear for us all. Even though no one wants to admit to it, but its true. Good luck with this. Who knows it may work out for the best. God Bless you
@kevchua (1004)
• Malaysia
30 Jul 09
Hi there, I had a girlfriend a few years ago. We didn't get along well, we argued - she said she loved me, well... i loved her too but the arguments that we had were not what I had wanted in a relationship. It was too frequent because she had her ideals and her expectations, and I guess I couldn't meet them no matter how hard I tried. I was bluffing myself - I kept telling myself she's not the one for me. In the end, I had to break up. It wasn't easy but I had to do it. Now I'm happily married to another woman.
In your case, there is a bit of similarity. You need to know what causes the fights. If the fights are caused by unfulfilled expectations, then one of you have to reduce the expectations. If the fight is about money, then do something about it. Try sort things out in a civilised manner first. If nothing works out, then I'm sorry to say that you've to gather enough courage to leave her.
@sarcasms (120)
• India
30 Jul 09
yes the situation is similar there are so many expectations frm my end u know fr her to meet me more often to care fr me..........coz i m totally into her and she says she is very happy but smhw i feel betrayed u know smtimes and hurt coz it seems she shuld haev done smthng but she didnt why is tht .......just makes u wondder at tht instant tht is she really care fr u if she does why is she so selfish and insensitive ..........coz i always put her things frst i have more priorty fr her why doenst she ..........?
@aubreykrzyz (16)
• United States
30 Jul 09
break ups are never easy. it seems like you've made up your mind about it but you are having trouble actually letting her know. just do it! tell her exactly how you feel and then focus on getting over her and moving on. you deserve better. everyone should be treated with respect especially by their partner!
