How do you forgive those who have hurt you?

the secret is to forgive and try to forget. I'm really hard to forget (I forgive easily, cause I'm pretty flawed too). I usually get stressed and need some time away to calm down and forget about things. It's extremely necessary if we must live with other people, but it's not really easy.

I have had some very bad experiences like that. One way which helps me to forgive the person(s) who hurt me, is to believe that it is not their fault, rather it is my unlucky fate that brought the people who hurt me. I need not put the fault on them, just forgive them !

forgive and forget, will be lightens burden in your heart. Pray for the person you forgive. Fogive meanst let your heart forget those bad experiences which such person who have sinned in you. Pray for them that they will realized they wrong doings, and accept it with open heart. No body is perfect so you should understand and forgive those person doing wrong on you.

I pray hard for myself to forget all the pains inside. It was really hard to forgive those people who've hurt but I need to forgive them for the LORD will also forgive me too. I had an experienced with a guy that I almost don't know how will I forget what he has done to me. Time had passed, and those years, that I never communicate with him and I have learned to forgive him and totally he is just a memory...

its really hard to forgive someone. it will really take a long time to erase the hurt and anger towards the person who hurt you. personally, the best thing to forgive someone is to totally erase that person in your life... forget any memories of them, throw all things that will remind you of them, and create new memories with other people.

However hard I'd bring my religion into it and pray that God give me the ability to forgive and move on. The act of forgiveness is wonderful because it's not just a means of letting the other person off the hook but freeing yourself from the bitterness etc. (=

Hi, lcainiao, you raised a good post, when I loved my ex-boyfriend, I loved him heart and soul, but after our breaking up, I found it very hard to forgive him because he hurt me so much, since he worked far far away from me, I texted messages to him and blamed him, I'm sure that I seemed like a freak, but the reason why I blamed him is that I really really love him. It was so hard, but I finally forget him, what I wanna say is that, time is the best cure.

That will depend on how they hurt me. If it's a small matter and will be forgotten over time, I will just forgive and forget. There's no point holding grudge over something like that. But if it's something big like leaving scar in my memory, it won't be easy for me to forgive. I will remember and only forgive until the person apologise.

it is hard for me to forget than forgive, even i forgive, that hurt will be on my mind forever. if that person really feels sorry, i will forgive them.. but if they have no sense of regret or guilt for hurting me.. i will not forgive.. it is really hard. i m trying to change that attitude. i hope i can..

i think that the time can change all of things,including hatred,i found that it is very little i could not remember in my heart for long time now,maybe somebody said it is amazing,but i can do that,maybe somebody ask me why did you forgive those who have hurt you,yes,your speaking is right,i was hurted deeply and hate why they treat me with that way,this thing was obssesion with several years and affect my life and work and my character,i could not believe that good thing happened,this is not useful for me,there are only dark in my heart and not shine,but the time past quickly,i am besy at my work and my life,i could not enough time to notice the past thing and forget this and become happy in my life,so this teach me why to look at it with attitude,maybe you found this is dirty that finally wash out,so i forgive those,i know i could not easy to be hurted by this,i still believe i can live better.

i find it hard to forgive right away those who have done me wrong...... i do hold grudges for a while... but not for long.... i don't go out of my way to be friends with that person again/ but if he/she comes to me i would be okay after a while ...........times does heal

It is easier said than done. Not every one is a Jesus Christ or a Mahatma Gandhi to do it, at least with the ease they did. The reason is very simple, not every one has the understanding of people, their mentalities, concerns, conditions and reasons. It may be that we may be just small enough to be bogged down in hurt and not big enough to look beyond that. I have been in many such situations and have, in every situation I have fallen short of what is what is expected of a human. I have been a person, crass, warts, moles and all the infirmities, until I chanced to listen to a feature on hurt on the Telly. (BTW Who called it an Idiot box?) This was what on it. Let us say someone insults you in front of the whole world! It is natural that you think of it and are miserable. Stop! Ask yourself "Who caused the most hurt?" The other person? or You! You would most probably say, "Hold on! ME? NO!" "OKAY! How many times did the other person insult you?" "Once" and you? My guess is that you have repeated it to your self as many times as it took to make you utterly angry, resentful, dejected, depressed and miserable. So who did the most damage? YOU! Hard to digest, but true. You simply affirmed and re-affirmed it to yourself till you made yourself believe it and maybe even found it romantic! That is why it is very hard to forgive anyone who hurt you, because you are not sure who did in the first place. Your mind is so full of negative thought that positive thought has no chance to enter even edgewise. Assuming a work issue was the cause of the incident, let us think a work done or not done, was the trigger. If the work was not done or done badly, not on time or botched, then, you were asking for it! The worse the insult, the more you should thank or it, because it is a reminder for you to pull up your socks. You are the main offender to yourself. If the other person has insulted for no reason at all, then it is evident that he is mistaken. The way to deal with him is to reason with him. (May not work!, but try, if there is a resistance,it will start thinking, he is not likely to try it again!) Getting stuck in hurt is hurting yourself. All this happens because of an ego, you had started to nurture as "Self respect", but which went haywire somewhere along the way! Let go the ego, self respect will let you forgive yourself, the "Main offender", forgiving the lesser is easy.

If some one hurts me,The way i forgive differs from person to person.I have a habit of changing my state of mind instantly.But i always try my best not to hurt them back just because some one hurt me. Most of the people in todays society doesn't think before doing something.It might be for the good or for the bad. But me of course Prefers to forgive at any cost. After al to forgive is God.

all i know is u can never forgive somebody who had hurt u .dat particular incident will be etched in ur memory forever. all u CAN do is give them another chance at being ur friend.or watever the relationship.it may sound contradictory but i know it to be true.i have a friend who once asked my gal to do soething i did not approve of... a very petty thing actually but wen i opposed the idea this friend thought dat i was imposing upon my gal my ideas and am forcing her she told me dat wat she was asking my gal to do had nothin to do wit me and dat should back out. this was hurting because not only did my gal not approve of my friends idea but she accused me of lot of things which i was not and insulted me in the process. i stormed out and thus started a cold war which lasted for nearly one and half years. she herself understood her fallacy and demanded forgiveness but as i said i did not wnt to refuse her my friendship when she was asking for it and though i did not forgive her i had missed her in that one and half years and we both gave each other another chance at our friendship which lasts until today. and we have not talked abt the fight ever since dat day.cos we both know i will only be causing fricton which is not requred and somethings are best left buried beneath.maybe dat is forgiveness. but i dont know.

hi I was molested by dear hypocritical dad at age 7 going on8 and he only did it once only because I would not let myself be alone with him anywhere and I hated him so much that when I married I felt as of'i were carrying the world on my back.my hubby said forgive him,your'hatred wont hurt him but it will make you sick so I did' I willnever forget how he betrayed an innocent child but I did forgive him and the load lifted.After all he was my father,good bad or evil he was my father andi owed him some respect but not any love,never again.

I wish I had the courage to forgive my exGF who had hurt me so hard. Sometimes the pain is too impressive to forget. Letting go of the past isn't an easy thing. I am learning to forgive. Good day.