My Own Relationship Dilemma
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
Philippines
September 14, 2009 4:23am CST
Ok, I want to open up this to you all mylotters.. ^_^
I have a problem with my current love relationship..
To start off, I have a steady girlfriend, but I think it's not stable because we didn't communicate that much for a year now.. I think the love is gone.. And now the problem is.. Another girl came around and I was dropped dead in love with her!
Don't call me a cheater because I didn't do something.. yet.. ^_^ but I don't know.. I'm so lost now.. we text and I think she has some interest in me..
Need some advice.. thanks.. ^_^
1 person likes this
15 responses
@busybren (258)
• United States
15 Sep 09
First of all, if you care, be kind. No one deserves to get hurt just because one person fell in love. You can love whoever you want, but to be in love is so strong, so deep and so beautiful. It's almost like a miraculous journey that you can see yourself sharing with this person for more than just fun times and desired feelings. It's like a union of souls. LoL cheesy? Well think about it this way. Why waste either of your guys' time together when you can just set eachother free and still be happy ???
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
17 Sep 09
^_^ I don't think your words are cheesy.. They were beautiful! Seems like prose poetry to me.. yeah I do care for my girlfriend still and I don't want to hurt her but when love comes to balance the equation i love the other girl more than more.. Yeah it's the sad truth..
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
19 Sep 09
You are right about we still love each other, It's just tough that we don't have a communication though.. I just miss her.. maybe.. and just feel the void by having a love for another girl? I still don't know.. But I try to be fair.. ^_^
@busybren (258)
• United States
17 Sep 09
THIS IS TOUGH! You both love eachother (you and your girlfriend), but you probably love alot of people. To be "in love" is something totally different. Tell her that you need time, perhaps you'll feel different later, but to have her think you want to be with her just as equal as her wanting to be with you, isn't fair. Or you can just let this other chick go, along with your feelings for her and see what will become of your current relationship or try out this new relationship and hope you didn't make a mistake LoL
Good luck with that and an update down the line would be pretty cool. Spread the cheese lol
@jscaz1314 (82)
• China
15 Sep 09
I agree with the second floor's expression: lack of getting in touch with everyone is the killer between relationships.
Those you have lost maybe make you heart broken somehow.But it is the fact,you
should not worry about it very much.I think you are very happy now.Because you find the one you love and love you. You must get the chance and never lost it if you real love the girl.
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
19 Sep 09
I'll take the chance with her but I'll just do it slowly.. I will build friendship to her first.. ^_^
@personaave (598)
• Philippines
14 Sep 09
Just like what the other mylotter here said, I don't think you're cheating. Although I think you better try to communicate with your girlfriend first and straighten out things with her, find out what the real score about your relationship is. And anyway, since you mentioned that you think the love is gone, then tell her that, so you could start a new relationship and move on with your life.
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
I don't know but I don't have the guts to say that I don't love her anymore.. I'm so worried what will happen to her if I said that deadly words..
@anna728 (1499)
• United States
14 Sep 09
It sounds like you already know that you want to break things off with the old girlfriend and make a move with the new girl, but just want someone to tell you you're making the right choice... well I have to say, there is no point in sticking around in a relationship if you don't feel the same anymore, so you might as well go ahead and go for it with the new girl anyway.
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
Another straightforward answer.. I'll maybe do that but like in my previous reply to the other mylotter.. I'm so scared to say that I don't feel the love for her.. Still worried for her future thought..
@martieann (40)
• United States
15 Sep 09
The honorable thing to do is to break up with one girl before putting the moves on another. If you are out of love with your girlfriend why keep her around? Back up? It is best to be unattached totally, before getting involved with any one else.
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
19 Sep 09
You have some points about being fair with love that you must break up with a girl before foregoing with a new one, but I have to disagree with you that he is a back-up.. What do you think about human beings as materials? But you are right about in your point of view in love..
@nidiajudith (2)
• United States
15 Sep 09
Well marlonjohn_varon,
The thing is once you begin to build up feelings for someone whoh has just entered your life, it's a sure sign that you do not have as much feelings for your girlfriend as you may have had in the beginning of things. Many people grow out of love, and if they are given the time to be on their own, you find out that your interests don't meet eachothers. stop wasting your time and hers. It may not be easy, but you should end the relationship as soon as possible. Don't get invovled too quick into a new one though. Build a relationship from friendship... That always turns out good.
Good Luck
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
19 Sep 09
This is the one reply that I want to follow trough. I think that it is best to start with a new friendship with the new girl before going things to quick.. So I can be sure if the feelings that I have for her is so true to the core, and not infatuation..
Thanks for the beautiful post and keep mylotting.. ^_^
@snowy22315 (181948)
• United States
19 Sep 09
If you don't want to be with your girlfriend and longer break up with her. She may feel the same way about you anyway. You aren't going to do anyone any favors by being with someone you don't care about any more, and she will be better off being with someone who cares alos.
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
17 Sep 09
If you haven't spoken to your girlfriend in a year, I'd guess that relationship has long been over and you're holding onto nothing! You're a free man and able to date whoever you wish now.
@EliteUser (3964)
• Australia
19 Sep 09
Hey,
Well why not try to communicate with your other girl who you didn't talk to for a long time? You should ask her some questions to see if she is still interested in you. If she isn't, then you can freely go for the other girl. But make sure that you LOVE her and that it isn't lust. Make sure you have a good day, Happy Lotting!!
@med889 (5941)
•
14 Sep 09
I do not think this is cheating because one year waiting for someone who did not turn out is more than enough to know that the relationship was not a continuity. Now you have a right to think about you too, but I will suggest you talk with your girlfriend who is the long distance one to make everything clear before going out with this girl.
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
I don't know what to say because we haven't communicate that much.. I think she forgot all about me.. But there is some invisible thread attach to her.. I'm so confused..
@arek_ngamen (183)
• Indonesia
17 Sep 09
communication is important ...
you should choose which one is you must comfort and enjoy to chat and spend a time ...
@mohitseth (568)
• India
14 Sep 09
u r not a cheater dude belive me.
its mentality of man so accept it.
good wishes for ur new relationship.
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
This is the straightforward comment I've received so far.. Yeah, I think it's just normal for a man to be in love again.. ^_^
@marlonjohn_varon (33)
• Philippines
16 Sep 09
Yeah, I think communication is beast when you are in any kind of relationship.. Each other must be transparent for the future..
