Cheating

Lampar, Cheating is NEVER ok. It is always a sticky situation for the cheater as well as the cheatee. I had a boyfriend once who cheated on me, and quite frankly my first reaction was pure revenge and hatred. I wanted to hurt him as badly as he hurt me. I was so angry and furious that nothing seemed to satisfy me. Then when I chose to stay with him after I had calmed down, whenever we would fight, I would mention that, because deep down it still hurt. Also it was just too hard to completely forgive him and to believe that he wouldn't do something like that again. In the end we decided to split because it created too many trust issues.

i am not a kind of person who deals with problems like that, but i will tell or express to the cheating person that i saw him/her. i will look at him in the eye with disgrace. but if i saw the wife of my brothers, or husbands of my sisters well thats a different situation. with regarding my wife, i dont think that she will do that. i am a perfect husband har har har joke. well we talk about anything and everything and we rather hear it from each other than to being caught in the act.

This just happened to my mom and she wanted to try and work it out, if only because she had invested 30 years of her life into my dad and couldn't imagine her life with out him. Now he has become a jackass all the way around and she is not feeling the same way. They are divorcing. I do not tolerate cheating and I make it known. It has never happened to me and hopefully it never will, but that is the ultimate breech of trust. My mother is now in a situation where she is divorcing my dad for something horrible that he did to her and his family and the lawyers tell her that California is a 'no fault state' which means that all divorces are mutual and no one is blamed or punished for their actions that may have led to divorce. Now she is in danger of becoming a poor, single mother, cheated out of some of her child support because of the way that my dad is trying to make the judge believe that he will take care of the kids. It seems to me that the system here is giving positive re-enforcement to my dad, who screwed another lady in a parking lot and punishing my mother who was always faithful and stayed home her whole life to take care of his children. Cheating destroys people, and not just the people directly involved... I too am having to redefine my view on the world and on men in particular.

I would catch him in a lie, make him confess, and then leave him. All trust would be gone and I would never be able to forgive him for what he has done.

cheating is never ok whether he did it first or she did this or that...it doesnt matter. u made a commitment to that person so u either restrain urself from cheating oooor or walk out

If I found out my husband was cheating behind my back I would first be hurt but then angry. I think if you have the desire to cheat (and I've always told him this) come to me first and let's work on why you want to cheat. Cheating in a marriage is adultery and grounds for divorce. I know I could never fully trust someone who cheated on me and there wouldn't be any point in continuing the marriage. Trust is the foundation of any relationship and if you don't have it because the other cheated it's better to end it. Even before I was married I felt the same way, if you feel the need to cheat then you don't need to be with that person or you need to work on why you feel that way and you'll have a better relationship.

I agree with you. I cant compromise and forgive in a situation like that......

I'm choosing your path. My husband is having an emotional affair with another woman. While he shows me no emotion, it's actually breaking my heart being in this relationship. But I'm counting the days to when I can leave him and start over somewhere else.

hi lampar, that problem is very common nowadays lampar, i hate if a person does it.. if ever that will happen to me, well i will talk to him seriously and talk with each other if do we need to continue our relationship.. i will not shout at him or even make him bitter, talk and talk and we can just fix it out.. if it will not, oh better break him off and leave him alone with his girl.. maybe we are not meant for each other and start another chapter in our life to someone who deserves our love.. janebeth.

Hi lampar! I think nobody wants to be cheated except when you are also a cheater. I would definitely ask my partner why is he doing that to me, if he is no longer happy with the relationship we have then we can part ways. However, the decision should both come from us depending on the explaination that he'll be giving me it might be me who had pushed him away. In this case I can give him a chance and make sure that we both make an effort to work things out but the third party should be out of the picture.

As for me, i think i will just talk to him heart to heart. i will ask for an explanation why he has to do that to me and then ask him to choose between us. if he choose her, then that would be the end of our relationship. However if he choose me instead and promise me he wont commit same mistake again, i will forgive him and give our relationship a second chance. and i will help him forget the girl and make our relationship worth fighting for.

i do not take cheating lightly. i will confront my husband about it and much as i would want to be cool-headed in doing so, that i can only try but cannot promise nor guarantee that i would be able to control my temper. things such as cheating ur partner is already a grave offense between spouses. i may be level-headed in other confrontations but this one, no guarantee. i believe that cheating, either once or a few times, is still cheating. and i am of the opinion that if he can cheat for once, i am sure he can do it all the time. i would be very much hurt if he cheats me and that fact would surely make me feel depressed thinking about it all the time. i should think of ways to save myself from depression, talk it out with him, tell him i want to break free from the relationship. it would be very hard at the beginning but it is better than being in a relationship where cheating has no end. i have to accept that fact and i will try to move on with the help of friends and relatives and with a lot of prayers.

i would deal with this type of situation like this.. 1. if i suspect that my boyfriend is cheating on me, i'll confront him. i'll ask him face-to-face and ask him whether or not he's having an affair. i'll give him my reasons for having such suspicion. and i'll tell him how all this makes me feel. after airing out my side, i'll listen to his. i'll give him the chance to explain himself. then we'll both straighten things out and decide on what to do with our relationship. 2. but if i caught my boyfriend cheating on me, i will walk out from our relationship without telling him that we're over. i will not hear his side anymore because it's enough that i caught him red-handed. i will not communicate with him anymore because i don't like to be with someone who cheats on me. if somebody cheats on you, then it means that they don't love you and they're not happy with you that's why they are having an affair.

i would definitely be pissed and then i would break up with him immediately. cheating is cheating. when you cheat on somebody who you claim you love, it's like disrespecting your commitment to each other, etc etc. look for that person who would want to be with you and would never cheat on you.

If I found out that my man was cheating on me behind my back I would kick his butt to the curb. I would end the relationship immediatly and find me someone who would love me and not go behind my back to have an affair with someone else.

I honestly cannot see this ever happening in our marriage but I'm sure there are hundreds of women who have said the exact same thing only to discover their husband cheated. If he did cheat on me I would be absolutely devastated and I really do think I would be filing for divorce. We've only been married for not even 6 months so I can't fathom either of us cheating and I can't even imagine what it would feel like to find out he had. Hopefully I never have to find out what it feels like!

I think most of people in the world can not accept the cheating relationship. I also think it’s not acceptable. However life is very complicated, likewise our love feeling is very complicated too. Sometimes we don’t have right or wrong answers. Sometimes we are in conflict to make a decision. Many people know the story between Clinton and his wife. When he did cheating thing to his wife, but his wife still stands in his side. His wife said I know he loves me; there is difference between love and relationship. Her statement made me thinking a lot.

one word! "enough" if i am right his cheating on me, ill just tell him this.. "i gave u all, i love you with all my heart, i gave u my trust and that's only for once, if u break it once, the only need to do is just go away forget me and thanks for being past, thank you because of this you gave me a chance to love and to be love someone deserve me and my love."

I have been involved in this type relationship for several years. My husband is a cheater and he promised he would end everything several years back. I know he has ended everything but now that he totally committed to me im not having the same feelings about him. So i guess he cheated first and then i went and cheated but honestly its not anyones fault we just are not ment to be together , cant be happy together. I think over the years its the falling out of love thing and since so much bad has happened i cant seem to get that feeling back about him now that ive found someone i honestly feel i was ment to be with.

I have a long distance relationship with my boyfriend, although i trust him 100%. If he met someone he did want to sleep with.. say have a one night stand with and he talked to me about it, i think i would be ok with it, as everyone has urges. as long as its me he wants to be with ( i know a lot of you will disagree) I just hope he would never cheat AKA always be honest with me about anything, including his urges towards another woman