Not having a baby, does it bother you?

Having children was a difficult and unhappy time for me. It's not all joy. Are you ready for children? Are you settled in a home with good finances? Do you have set ideas, your husband and you as to how you will raise your children? Do you have friends and family who will support you with love and care and not interfere or neglect you? Do you know what to expect from a pregnancy, birth and the next 18 years? If you are fully prepared and you and your hubby know what to expect and are ready then you should probably visit your physician to see if everything is ok with you both. Please don't rush in to anything with thinking it through carefully. Best wishes and lots of luck.

After I married when I was younger it was this way with me. It didn't help that my mom would constantly ask me when I was going to make her a grandmother. I felt so bad and like I wasn't whole. I was married for 5 years before having my first child. I had given up. You see my husband had been married for 5 years before he married me and no children of that marriage. I was also told about an accident when he was younger and he also had polio when he was a child. So it was thought that he would never produce a child. I had gotten in touch with an adoption agency and was working it out to get a child. I of course wanted a newborn which they said could take at least a year. This went on for about 6 to 8 months and I found out that I was pregnant. WOW, what a pleasant surprise! I told the doctor about before and asked why I finally got pregnant and not when I was first married or even later. He told me that when I was under pressure to have a child that I could not conceive. But as soon as I thought I could not have one of my own then my body relaxed more and I was able to get pregnant. It made sense to me as I always was hoping to get pregnant and was never relaxed. Then when I thought I could not have a baby there was no pressure to have one. My body was relaxed and I enjoyed love making more with my husband and I got pregnant. A very valuable lesson learned. I wish you lots of luck having a baby. Although I think that a couple needs at least 5 years together with no children so they can have quality time to themselves and with each other. having a baby takes a lot of your time. Many peopel resent the time the baby takes and no time for each other anymore. So when you do have a child make sure you and your husband still make time for each other. And relax dear...you'll get pregnant when your body is ready if you'll just allow it to. Tell the family not to pressure you or you may not have one any time soon. Relaxation is the key.

Not having children would have bothered me too...because I've always wanted a houseload of kids. But you need not despair. My husband's aunt had her first child 7 years after marriage...not by choice. So, it's not too late. Look at things positively. You've got more time to bond with your partner and understand him better. I had my first child less than a year into my marriage...and that wasn't a very good idea either. We ended up fighting all the time because we didn't know what ticks each other off and we also had the added responsibility of taking care of the baby which we couldn't push aside. Maybe you should go to a doctor and have a checkup to see if everything is alright. But I still say, it's not too late and you can have a baby.

Have a medical examination for both of you regarding this issue. Identify the problem and proceed with medicines. Extreme climates prevents production of sperm probably. Let him lay in bathtub with cold water for sometime everyday [:p] Peace.

It will not bother me.I will leave it all up to the hands of God.When we do not have a baby we must pray with faith to get a baby and God will see our faith and answer us.Here in meetings i see people who get babies very fast and i see people who do not have a baby for more than two years.Still i see joy on their faces as they might expect a baby in the future.

I don't really like children, or at least, I don't want to be bothered; so I don't feel at all the way you do. Some people should not be parents, and I'm one of them.

I use to be just like you. It seems like I just could not get pregnant. But I remember reading a book and the lady said that if you want soemthing you have to envision it and plan for it. She bought baby clothes, saw herself pregnant and put pictures around her of pregnant women. I also did some of these things, as well as pray. Remember Hannah in the bible who prayed to God for a child and He answered her prayers. Soon after I got a vision with a voice that said God has blessed you with a child, a male child. Now my son is 8 months old and very dear to me. Try it it just might work. Take care

pormadi I am an American and no this does not bother me as we do not marry solely to have babies, we marry for love and companionship and if we have babies fine, if we dont, we are sad but if we really want children we can adopt. I understand we all have different cultures, and am not at all criticizing yours. We all have our own customs. But two years is not all that bad as you are still fairly young and it can happen any time. sometimes Ihave seen couples get really upset because they were still without a baby but just as they were set to adopt the woman becomes pregnant. sometimes we want it too much and both man and woman get all uptight and that sort of slows down the whole scheme of things so just relax and see if pregnancy does not come after all. good luck, hope you soon have a baby . God Bless.

Obviously your culture is putting a lot of pressure on you - you have to get married and then start a family. It is seemed the 'norm' but Im talking from someone who doesnt follow a religion. I wasnt brought with being told to get married and have a family. I am currently pregnant and unmarried, it annoys me when people especially family members ask about me and my partner getting married. Im not really interested in getting married, maybe in 10-15 years but not now.

Hey, Yea I think that many couples should start thinking about having a baby 2 years after they get married. I think that yea, it would bother me, I mean it wouldn't bother me as much if we actually tried to plan when we could have a baby. Make sure you have a good day, God bless and Happy Lotting!!

I feel sorry for the women in your culture who opt to remain child-free. I have several friends who don't like and don't want kids, and that's their business. But they're entitled to their own opinions, just as I am. I don't have a problem with it. If they don't want kids, then God speed to them. I am a mom. I know it's not for everyone. I know several people WITH kids who should have aborted before they were born as they are horrible mothers. At least the child-free people KNOW they don't want kids and for whatever reason, may not make a good mom and they are reasonable enough to realize this and NOT bring a child into this world that will be abused or neglected.

Actually it depends on our longings in life, there are people who seemed not care having children, but personally I want to have children, so it bothers me to have none at this point in time because I am still single. Well, you have just married for two years, so you have still plenty ahead of time, actually there are people I know in my country who have children 12 years after they married. Just pray hard for it, God never fails you, try to ask heavenly and divine intervention for your longing and everything will be put into order. Remember the story of Samuel in the bible?Samuel mother was barren and for many years of her marriage she longed for a child but everything is fruitless, until one day she asked fervently to God with tears for a child, then later on she got pregnant and named him Samuel. We all know that Samuel became the last judge of Israel and he was the one who anointed Saul and King David. So keep on praying nothing is impossible if we offer yourself to God, surrender all your worries and fears to HIM and just believe in your heart that miracles do happen everyday. God bless you and Good luck!sooner or later you will become pregnant, mark my word.

Two-year is not a long time. So take easy. I know there are so many people who get their baby 3-5 years after their plan. In fact, this time is becoming more open and tolerant. It's ok even if having no child. DINK is a new fashion style of life. Whatever happened, just accept it and enjoy it.

Just for2 years, no problem. But, maybe, from now, your hubby and you should set down a BABY PLAN. Good luck for you.

Hey, Yea well most people don't really want to have a baby too soon, but I think that after about a few years, you should start thinking about having one. Don't have one at a too old age, because it will be harder to bring up the little one. Make sure you have a good day, Happy Lotting!!

I don't think having a baby, is not a big deal, my friend. You must think liberal in these days, my friend. Do not believe in that customary because they are incline with the commandments of God. Only God, know better for us. having no baby after the married is really happen. This is because of some defect and other consideration or condition in maturity...If you get married older than the regular age of entering marriage. Expect that you cannot have a baby at once but wait... Do not be worried if you haven't any baby yet. just patient to wait for the right time. If you are educated, and knows some scientific base why you are not having a baby after your married...do not influence from your belief that is against your will. have a nice day!

i understand you very much,i have a child,he give me o lot of happy time.i can't imagine how my live is if i have't my own child.but you can see a doctor to find reasons,sometime you relaxe yourself ,mybe i have your own baby someday.

Hello Pormadi, It is samething happen here in my culture. when ever the couples get married. Both side of the parents expect them to have children as soon as possible. It is something not accepting if you married with no child in my hubby family. Always this happen in those traditional thinking family. Just don't give up, you have only 2 years past. You can still have time to get pregnant. Maybe you can go for a relaxing vacation with your hub.

Hi Pormadi, Don't be sad. Getting pregnant is not easy for a woman. Some woman can easily get pregant and some are not. Don't pressurised yourself!! They are several factors need to be concern about before getting pregnant. In my culture, It is important to have a kid after getting married. But it does not mean it has to be a COMPULSORY. If God given me a kid, I will treasure him/her and try my best to give him/her the best. Since you are very concerned about having a kid for yourself.Try to find a time to talk to your partner,Visit your gynae together and have a proper chat over your case. Get a proper check up and find the problem on why you are still not conceived yet.

Hello I believe if it is meant it will happen when the time is right. I have one so I can't relate, but I know people that have and I often ask myself, why? I also know people that don't have and I think its a good thing, would not call this a cultural thing for me, just sixth sense. Not all woman are meant to be parents in my opinion, but I feel really bad for the mothers that try really hard and it takes longer than they wish, I hope you will have your bundle of joy soon, don't lose hope