How do you deal with negative people?

United States
September 18, 2009 8:50am CST
On a day to day basis i deal with a person that is %100 negative all the time. It drives me crazy! My husband is the most negative person on the planet! I just dont understand how one person can be so unhappy. I honestly try to live my life to find the good in most situations, im not a negative person and try to be encouraging to other people. With his negative attitude its starting to effect our marriage and im even concidering just moving on with my mylife without him. In some ways I already have moved on but just physically still living in the same house just for the benifit of my children. I really think he needs professional help but is the typical person that refuses to admit that point. If he could only see how it effects our children that they are starting to be negative about issues in their lives too. Thanks for any advice i can get from here
5 responses
• United States
19 Sep 09
OH I have this same problem My boyfriend takes everything that is negative way to seriously and he does not look on the bright side at all. He always points out the negative in things instead of looking for whats good about it. I am very much influenced by the energy around me so I have to work very hard to stay positive while still living with him but I am really unsure of how long it will last if he does not try to be more positive.
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Sep 09
I know it can be hard to keep yourself focused when so much negative energy around. It is difficult at best.
@malamar (779)
• Canada
18 Sep 09
That is one tough row you have to hoe, my young friend. In these somewhat difficult times, it is frequently hard to be positive. But, by being negative most of the time, he is doing harm to both you and the children. I don't know how you get someone to seek help when they refuse to to it. What I do know is how very difficult it is for children to grow up in an environment of negativity, conflict and stress. Maybe you should find the courage to seek some professional help. I am not sure how it works in your area, but our clinics offer free counseling to all citizens, as do our pastors, ministers, and so on. This is not to imply there is anything wrong with you, so please do not take it that way. These professionals have dealt with these situations many times before. They can provide you will answers to questions, and advise on how to handle day to day situations. Also, they can assist you in ways to keep the situation from affecting your children badly. Don't be afraid.... reach out, and at least listen to someone who has experience in these matters.
• United States
21 Sep 09
Thank you so much for the advice. I know you dont mean nothing bad or against me in saying these things. You are right im not experienced in dealing with this so might be good for the children if i get advice on how to keep things from effecting them so much. Thank you for your kind words :)
• India
24 Sep 09
hi, I understand how it goes when it comes to deal with negative people...and specially we cant even leave them so easily...My MIL is also a very negative person and i just cant avoid to stay away as we all are living together in joint family...also she is aged...so cant even make her understand her negativeity...The last 2 yrs of my life was very bad living with her and managing myself to be positive everytime and getting fail day by day...but now i got the key which is "to ignore her"...I now started ignoring her n her negative thoughts..i just dont look at her and dont listen to her.. But this cant be the same with you as it is ur hubby...I suggest you to take print out diff questionnaire which is available in internet which leads result of taking professional advice..when ur hubby is in good mood u ask him all the questions and then explain him his nature very calmly..that why dont u just come with me to a professional...there is no harm in that in fact it will give us all a better life including our children..
@niitesh (1653)
• India
24 Sep 09
Honestly I don't think we have much of a solution for such kind of person, even my dad is pretty much negative with his opinion, he always makes it a point to find a flaw or ways to avoid it instead of trying to get to the other end. He is just very much negative in everything he does and it really is effecting our lives as any decision we take we find him trying to avoid us from doing it.
• India
24 Sep 09
JUST CAME ACROSS YOUR DISCUSSION. I FEEL THAT whwn you say you are fed up with your husband then there is some negativity there also. I suggest that every day in the morning write the 5 best things you have in life and tell him to do so also. tell your children also to write the same .and i am sure if in any of thoise 5 things you have his name then there is still hope . just make it a habbit to count your blessings everyday .and lots of it .